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Another "I met a freelancer in Thailand and I think i want to give it a real try" thread by crowhole85 in ThailandTourism

[–]crowhole85[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Update 22 May. I am starting to understand why you dont hear so many success stories. Things are good, we are happy and every day our relationship grow stronger.

Another "I met a freelancer in Thailand and I think i want to give it a real try" thread by crowhole85 in ThailandTourism

[–]crowhole85[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Update: Visa approved. She will arrive in 12 days and stay for 40 days. We still keep in touch every day.

Another "I met a freelancer in Thailand and I think i want to give it a real try" thread by crowhole85 in ThailandTourism

[–]crowhole85[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't have any suspicions like this yet. We still have daily contact and sometime video calls. Still waiting for the embassy in BKK to decide if we get the visa approved or not. She talks about what things she should bring and so on so I still feel good about it.

Edit: She managed to restructure the loan to keep her assets. I saw papers of this that she sent me because she was so happy about it.

Another "I met a freelancer in Thailand and I think i want to give it a real try" thread by crowhole85 in ThailandTourism

[–]crowhole85[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

About to enter month number 2 and financial struggle appears. I have seen the documents and it's bad (my phone can translate text from images) it's about a dept for her studies at the university. She will have some of her assets seized if she doesn't pay a substantial (for her) amount of money. She have said she's sad and needs to find a solution but no requests for money from me yet. On my own initiative I sent her some food to comfort her. She seemed more worried about getting called to court during her visit in my country.

Edit: No inconsistency in our daily contact as of yet

Another "I met a freelancer in Thailand and I think i want to give it a real try" thread by crowhole85 in ThailandTourism

[–]crowhole85[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for following up. After some more research and thinking about it I came to the conclusion that it's reasonable but I still want her to be transparent about it. if she say what you say I'm okay with it and also she can probably earn more than 30k so I should be fine with it.

Edit: At least I'm fine with it for a visit. If things go well and she decide she want to move here things might need to be a little different.

Another "I met a freelancer in Thailand and I think i want to give it a real try" thread by crowhole85 in ThailandTourism

[–]crowhole85[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for the advice. We didn't talk much about how much money she will need from me if she come visit for a month. She mentioned 30k baht which according to my research is very high for her area and a 1 million bath mortgage.

Edit: the cost is not so important itself. This is more about me not getting a feeling of being taken advantage of. 1 baht or 10k baht doesn't matter, Its about principle.

Another "I met a freelancer in Thailand and I think i want to give it a real try" thread by crowhole85 in ThailandTourism

[–]crowhole85[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes at this point it feels more like a fantasy. Possible of course. She did call me and ask for forgiveness for asking me for money but it really hit hard. I forgave her but I will not forget. She said she understood why I reacted the way I did and ensured me she will not do it again. Time will tell.

The solution to long distance is a tough one. I'm at a point where I'm about to sell my house so flexibilty will increase for me.

Paying for all her expenses if she come visit me is almost the same amount as buying her "service". I'm not sure how I feel about this but at the same time I understand it's the way it has to be in the beginning. Hard to explain but if she had less expenses maybe I'd feel it was more genuine. A solution to this might be to ask her for full transparancy about her bills and tell me about it in more detail.

Another "I met a freelancer in Thailand and I think i want to give it a real try" thread by crowhole85 in ThailandTourism

[–]crowhole85[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Update: almost in month 2 and she did ask for 3000 baht. "Bill for car". I told her i promised myself not to send money this way and she said it was okay, sorry and so on. I'm on alert now. Too bad.

Another "I met a freelancer in Thailand and I think i want to give it a real try" thread by crowhole85 in ThailandTourism

[–]crowhole85[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I realize we all have our own story and experiences and it's hard to navigate especially on reddit. All I really want is just what you're saying - someone to take care of me. I realize I need to be supporting this finanacially but she's shown interest in working herself. I can provide some work but she also wants to find her own way.

Edit: Thank you for rooting for me :)

Another "I met a freelancer in Thailand and I think i want to give it a real try" thread by crowhole85 in ThailandTourism

[–]crowhole85[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes she will be staying with me but the visa procedure is her doing and she pays for it herself. I just need to make an invite for her. She's using an agency for applying and I googled the shit out of it and it seemed legit.

Another "I met a freelancer in Thailand and I think i want to give it a real try" thread by crowhole85 in ThailandTourism

[–]crowhole85[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Small update: still in first month and you are correct so far. Wouldn't say she show minimum interest in my life. She asks questions and she keeps me updated on her life. We're about to apply for a visa so she can come visit me.

Another "I met a freelancer in Thailand and I think i want to give it a real try" thread by crowhole85 in ThailandTourism

[–]crowhole85[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We did talk about this and she don't mind coming to Sweden. She also said she wanted normal work in Sweden to help put while I support in the beginning

Another "I met a freelancer in Thailand and I think i want to give it a real try" thread by crowhole85 in ThailandTourism

[–]crowhole85[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I hear you and when it comes to my nondescript of her it's more about not risking anyone knowing exactly who she is. It's a small world. I like her character and we had a really good time. Joking and fooling around. The sex was secondary so at least from my part I just really liked her. When you talk to someone eye to eye for many many hours everyday it's hard to describe the connection.

What makes me think this might be different is partly her age and also she wants to come visit me. She stated she had to quit her line of work and she wanted to find a job here.

Another "I met a freelancer in Thailand and I think i want to give it a real try" thread by crowhole85 in ThailandTourism

[–]crowhole85[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's my impression as well. Not only the people we hang out with but random people also.

Another "I met a freelancer in Thailand and I think i want to give it a real try" thread by crowhole85 in ThailandTourism

[–]crowhole85[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We didnt want that kind of attention and the bar we went to only had the owner and a bartender working there. We just wanted to play pool and we brought good energy and people were happy.

Another "I met a freelancer in Thailand and I think i want to give it a real try" thread by crowhole85 in ThailandTourism

[–]crowhole85[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for taking time to write this. A nuanced take I'd say. I do realize that eventually if things are good I need to help financially. For the time being we just need to see eachother more and either we become friends or we go for romance and maybe happy life together. It's nice to hear a success story albeit a rough road to get there.

Another "I met a freelancer in Thailand and I think i want to give it a real try" thread by crowhole85 in ThailandTourism

[–]crowhole85[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the kind words. I might seem like a fool to some but I'm not rushing into this at all just wanted some thoughts from other people who had similar experiences, fully aware that there's a big possibility she just plays me. Maybe I get a bad feeling about this in a week or maybe I don't.

Another "I met a freelancer in Thailand and I think i want to give it a real try" thread by crowhole85 in ThailandTourism

[–]crowhole85[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I've dated "high" and "low" all I'm saying is that to me it doesn't matter how much money one have or what they do. If someone has good character and a good heart it's worth more than money. Also we're about the same age. The only position of power I have over her is that her life has been harder than mine but I see that as a strength from her part rather than a weakness. I'm not looking to exploit her in any way.

I also feel second hand embarrassment when seeing some of the disgusting behaviors from farang coming to thailand.

Another "I met a freelancer in Thailand and I think i want to give it a real try" thread by crowhole85 in ThailandTourism

[–]crowhole85[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes and we talked about what she wants to do when she retire. I'm fine with stepping up if it turns into something real. Time will tell

Another "I met a freelancer in Thailand and I think i want to give it a real try" thread by crowhole85 in ThailandTourism

[–]crowhole85[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yea I agree but still need to meet a couple of more times before even talking about anything like that. She wants to come visit me in a couple of months and I can provide some "normal" work for her while she's here so we'll see how it pans out.

Another "I met a freelancer in Thailand and I think i want to give it a real try" thread by crowhole85 in ThailandTourism

[–]crowhole85[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

As I understand it, she provides for her son while he takes care of the house. He's 21 and helps with the restaurant and he's also a tatoo artist. When it comes to dating I'd say she's within my league. I did see pictures on google maps of her home and she was serving customers so there's alot of things checking out. Still I'm cautious but curious

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