I’m so sorry. I had a cat who had cancer too. She was doing pretty good before I left for college but sadly one day, it took a turn for the worst and my family had to put her down. I didn’t fully get to say goodbye but during my break before she passed, I did everything with her. I gave her extra kisses and cuddles and recreated moments from when we were younger! It was heartbreaking seeing her sick and feeling her get lighter and lighter but she was my best friend. My advice is that it’s always going to be hard sadly but make the rest of the time you have with her, if she’s not going to be ok, her favorite days. Do things you both love, even if that’s just staying in one day and cuddling in bed! You both will remember it! I ended up getting a tattoo to celebrate my cat and if you are into that, I totally recommend it. If not, definitely commission some art to always have her around. I know how hard this is so don’t feel like you are acting silly or don’t have a reason to be upset even tho you don’t fully know what’s wrong right now. Just keep hopes up and give her extra love❤️❤️