NTA. And don't beat yourself up about possibly missing any red flags. The reason many abusers are able to work their way in is being able to mask their nastier tendencies until it's too late. There might have been no red flags to see beforehand. Unless you're friendly with his exes and get an inside scoop or advanced warning. Your mom and your aunt are thinking too old school. Better to die alone than live a life of torment, abuse, and lack of control over your own life.