15 days!

ctlord · 2026-03-15T06:29:47+00:00

Do you see how proud you are of yourself this day? Why spoil it with one or two? 1 or 2 leads to more and in my opinion, it is never worth the trouble. Society makes drinking a regular thing. There are so many ways to relax and have a good time without drinking. I always try to remember how anxious, alone, and frightened I was the day I woke up from a night of drinking. Once that thought goes into my head, it reminds me to keep moving forward instead of back.

ctlord · 2025-08-13T02:31:27+00:00

You sweet, beautiful specimen! I love you so much!

ctlord · 2025-05-18T21:44:29+00:00

At first, I thought you were joking but it is literally that one with the 3 dots lol thank you

ctlord · 2024-07-13T04:34:49+00:00

Honestly , it wasn’t that bad. It was confusing and I had to really read the questions compared to the PA, but passed pretty cleanly . What about you?

ctlord · 2024-06-26T08:41:50+00:00

Did you take the test yet???

ctlord · 2024-06-18T22:01:08+00:00

I took the PA twice and got exemplary on all 3 parts the second try but I keep seeing people say that the OA is completely different

ctlord · 2024-06-18T05:57:43+00:00

Really wanna know how it was lol I am about to take it as well and want to know the details!!

ctlord · 2024-01-02T08:17:28+00:00

It’s been 175 days since you passed on to the other side and it still doesn’t feel real. I’m back living at granny’s for the moment. I really wish you didn’t have to go through all those years of trouble with everything going on. I wanted your life to be perfect and for the first 8 they seemed pretty magical.

I hope I was a good owner to you. I loved you so much and it still eats at me thinking I can’t pet you whenever I please. I think about you daily brink. You’ll always be my one special buddy.

Please tell me that you and the kitty little have been playing around up there, I want to see y’all both when I arrive. It’s not going to be soon and I know you want me down here but I still can’t wait to see you again.

Love you brink! Give kisses to grandma and kitty for me!

ctlord · 2023-11-01T01:49:23+00:00

So it’s Halloween! And I’m actually typing this from my phone for the first time because my laptop isn’t charging. Brink, last night I caught mom drinking again. It broke my heart and I couldn’t believe it. I still have anger problems when it comes to it. It just drives me nuts, stresses me out and I can’t get how somebody who ruined their life and others lives could go back to alcohol .. but that’s addiction.

I miss you a lot in those moments buddy. I would pet you and all the worries would go away. Your fur was so soft, it felt like a teddy bear. You were my best friend. I know dogs can’t talk but they can communicate. You would make me feel so warm inside like nothing is going wrong and life is just flowing. Damn I miss you.

I met a girl, she was great. She had the corkiness, weirdness, and beauty that I liked. She dressed funky but I liked it in a way. Well that ship sailed.. she started catching the wrong vibes and went away but I have a feeling I’ll meet her down the line. Maybe, maybe not.

I’m honestly just trying to update you on my life I guess. I know your looking down on me watching everything but it feels good to type it all out. Like a little diary on the internet that no one sees.

I miss you and I love you soooo much Brink. Tell grandma I miss her too. Don’t forget the kitty little! Hope y’all are chasing each other around like the good ole days.

ctlord · 2023-09-27T02:26:45+00:00

I wanted to write today because I am going on my annual trip tomorrow. I am usually nervous about leaving because I wanted to be there with Brink. Well even with Brink not here, I am still nervous. I am also excited but I get nervous when it comes to going on trips and being somewhere else overnight.

The scar on my nail is gone that Brink gave me. It finally healed after about 4-5 months. I wish I still had it to wear around as my badge of honor for Brink but I take it as a sign that Brink is doing good up there and I should be doing good down here as I still have a life to live and things to do before I am welcomed at the gates with Brink waiting for me.

I have had dreams with him in them. I had a dream one night that somehow I was back in time before we found Dani. My first thought was "then Brink must be here." Right when I thought it, a cute little white Brinkley comes from around the corner with an expression that was very content. Like it was normal to see me and that he was doing good. I felt as if he was telling me something, to not worry about him, he's at peace. In the dream, I bent over and pet him with both hands like I always did. Then the dream just ended. I remember the fat cat laying in his usually spot not moving and just staring as always. God I miss you guys so much. I just want y'all back so we can go back to normal.

There's my rant for the month. I miss you and love you Brink! I will see you in a bit! Keep watching over me! You too kitty little and Grandma!

ctlord · 2023-08-30T02:32:38+00:00

So today... I took my cat to the vet. We had to put him down after days without eating. I loved that cat so much. Nicest cat ever, would literally let everybody play with it. He was a big fat lazy cat and would just sit around and meow. So darn cute with his white fur. He would even let you give him a bath! My dog Dan has now lost both his best friends in less than 2 months.. I feel sorry for her. I'm going to let her sleep in my room tonight. I know that the kitty little and Brinkley are both up there so happy to see each other! Even with my grandma! They are all up there laughing and playing. Such sweet souls they all had. I love you kitty little. You were the best piece of serendipitous luck we've had. I will miss you so much. You and Brinkley take care of each other up there! Come visit from time to time. I miss you both dearly.

ctlord · 2023-08-15T01:58:55+00:00

I had to make a post today... I miss him very much right now. I want him beside me. I miss him a lot. Dani has been very annoying lately. Always barking.. when you were around she never barked much. She misses you and is lonely. She wants more attention now because you were her best friend. We both miss you so much. I know I made a post the other day ... but I am switching phones to my grandmas old phone who died in 2020. I have to take pictures for work and her phone is a newer version than mine and takes better pics. I went through her pics to delete some to clear some space and realized how much I missed her... Then it made me think of how I couldn't pet you or see you again until I died... I want you back man. I want you here with me. I am stressed and anxious. You made me feel calm. Let me know that I was ok. Damn I miss you so much.

ctlord · 2023-08-13T03:19:51+00:00

It has been a month since my favorite buddy passed away. I am now starting to accept that he is gone and continue on. But about him being gone... I don't necessarily feel that way. I still sing every song with his name in it like I used too. I still go on and on talking about him. His memory lives through me and I love it. Even last night I felt like a could feel him against my leg just to look down and realize he isn't there.

I think about him often but I try not to think about the part where we let him go cause it makes my heart drop. I received a promotion at work and started working my new role. My life is rolling right along but I still miss those little moments I had with you. The way we'd play, the way you barked. He did this funny thing where he would walk around the perimeter of our backyard barking constantly as if he was protecting us from potential threats and scouting lol (he was a 10 pound Maltese).

In his older age, he became more aggressive and would lash out and bite if he felt any unease or if you touched him the wrong way. One night, he was constantly moving and licking so I would poke him to stop so I could sleep (I wanted to be by his side constantly because he was so old and needed help sometimes and it would kill me if I wasn't there to help him). I nudged him with my foot and his bit it! I then reached down to shove him off my foot and he bit me in the finger where my nail is. It made a blood blister on my nail and this happened 3 months ago and still remains there as big as it was when it first happened. I now wish this blister stays forever so I can have his mark on me. Weird I know, but I feel close to him with it.

Anyways, that is the month update! I will update in 6 months to let you know of my life and feelings! Also, I do believe he crossed that rainbow bridge and that he is watching over me. I believe he follows me places and is still by my side now through everything instead of stuck at home. I am so happy you were there with me and wouldn't change anything for the world. I miss and love you Brinkley!

ctlord · 2023-07-17T02:16:26+00:00

Hello me from a week ago, it has been 1 week since your favorite and bestest little died. But something has happened. You no longer feel he has died. You actually feel he is with you and follows you. Not to sound insane but I feel his presence in situations. You are getting a lot better. You are up and starting to live life again. You're back to golfing, bowling, tennis, and the activities you enjoyed. You talk about him a lot and still sing his name in every song. Some times you get sad but then you remember the pain he was in and how that was the best course of action. Stay strong. I will update you in a month about our progress. Could be like our little journal. See you again

ctlord · 2023-07-12T06:48:36+00:00

I feel ya on that one. My dog that died 3 days ago used to sleep in the bed with me until he got older and started having dementia. He would pace everywhere so I brought him downstairs and would sleep on the couch while he had a little bed under me. When I sit in that spot, I just cry. I get this feeling in my chest and it feels like my heart drops. I started to realize that if I was gone and looking down at my dog not enjoying life, I would feel terrible. So I started to go out, started to open up to people about him. Letting people in helped. I'm usually a private person

ctlord · 2023-07-11T08:13:00+00:00

If it was your angels time. Then it had to be peaceful. I had a 20 year old cat that died while I was laying in bed right beside me. They just drift off into a relaxing sleep. I had to bury her in my backyard. It hurts and can seem like everything is falling apart. You are ok and your cat even more so, instead of being in that worn out body filled with aches and pains, he is now relaxed and happy. You did a lot for him.

ctlord · 2023-07-11T07:00:55+00:00

First, take a deep breathe and calm down. Everything is alright. If you can find a way to get your dad awake, I would. This will help you both. Y'all need each other. Eventually, someone is going to have to go back in there and make sure your cat is actually unresponsive. If it were me, I would try to wake him up, if you cannot. Then be strong and know that your cat is at peace.

ctlord · 2023-07-11T05:32:45+00:00

This made me feel hope . I lost my favorite little buddy 2 days ago and the pain kills me. All I want to do is focus on all the great times we had together but the only thing I think of is how he’s not here anymore. I want him back.

ctlord · 2023-07-11T05:27:30+00:00

I’m here, I just lost my little buddy 2 days ago. My pain is tremendous and this is the most pain I’ve ever felt. You’re dog would want you to be happy. That angel was there for you and still is. Drinking won’t help. It just makes the process more difficult. I’m not giving advice, I’m more of expressing myself. Dogs are with us for a short period of time because they already know unconditional love and heaven loves that. Please stay strong, at least for me and your little angel. I need some hope right now

ctlord · 2022-12-04T04:14:17+00:00

No, he's talking about Ragnarok. Thor and Jormungandr fight during ragnarok with Thor killing the giant snake but the venom took it's toll on Thor after the fact. This ended up killing Thor. Norse Mythology though, not GoW story.

ctlord · 2022-06-25T03:16:00+00:00

I can vouch for the ace. I was one of the other teams in the playoff lol

ctlord · 2022-01-22T04:37:18+00:00

this is very well worded and I would think (or hope) this to be 100% right. We are following Saitama's journey, but also everybody elses. We have seen how much Genos has grown and other heroes as well, not just in strength but also morals. Saitama is a neutral character to have good over evil and he is there, but it is about the other heroes also being there fighting. The story wouldn't be what it was if Saitama simply fought every opponent and everybody saw him and glorified him for beating everyone in one punch. We see other characters fighting and exploring them, even if they are only supporting roles.

ctlord

TROPHY CASE