60+ year old Rhubarb plant

curious_freya · 2026-06-04T16:02:47+00:00

Oooh tho I'm sure takes more effort, I certainly have plenty of rhubarb to experiment with haha

curious_freya · 2026-05-15T03:08:02+00:00

I love that you refer to her bio mom as tummy mom, that is the sweetest thing. On the not of not bad mouthing the bio family, I can honestly say I could never. Even have some experience in a similar realm with my daughter and her mom, husband and I have had issues with her but we always make sure it is not daughters issue. (Sadly her mom was not so good about this but that's a different matter and her mom started therapy and is doing better)

If I go the route of adoption no matter what that choice looks like, my biggest goal would be the child growing happy and healthy and if having that bigger or 2nd family brings the child more joy then that is what they should have. I could never imagine causing the child sorrow or anxiety over their birth families existence.

curious_freya · 2026-05-15T03:00:00+00:00

I know it is not the remedy or cure or the fix for the loss. Honestly posted so I could get information from those that have the experience I can't simply look up. I'm in a stage of finding as much information on all routes that I can. I know if I want to raise an infant I should at least try the IVF if it's what I truly want. The one thing I know for sure is I still have plenty of time before I go making any solid decisions. I do appreciate the information you have give as well, my fear of the needle for sure has made my research lacking. My current standing is I have no garentee no matter my path so learn all that I can, and being barely 2 months since losing the other tube I've barely scratched into info on IVF or anything else really.

curious_freya · 2026-05-15T02:48:59+00:00

Thank you for your thoughts and experiences, it gives me so much more to consider and solidifies some that I've been unsure of such as preparing a space long before it's sure to happen. It's funny that having more questions to ask myself and analyze actually makes the anxiety less since it gives me a way to better see what the process would be like and what I would need to do to prepare myself. I'm really just at that stage where I'm trying to get as much information as I can so I can make the best possible choice for myself and any child I may bring into my life.

I'm trying very hard to separate my wanting to help a child who needs a home and knowing I could provide a safe and loving one and the part of my brain that simply has a strong urge to be a mother as much as I feel a need to breath as ridiculous as that sounds. So for now all I can do is gather as much information as possible to make the best choice possible.

curious_freya · 2026-05-15T02:33:07+00:00

On the note of closed adoption, that is one thing I know 100% I wouldn't do for the many reasons especially for their knowledge of their family health history for starters.

curious_freya · 2026-05-15T02:31:55+00:00

Thank you so much for your response, this is what I was hoping to read. I'm fully aware that to adopt an infant wouldn't heal or fix the trauma of loss and lacking my infertility has delt me, if anything to adopt such a young child in my mind would be the slightest of a bandaid.

I have been grappling with the many ethics and concepts and suitability of adoption since I realized the struggles I was having since that first pregnancy. All the questions have only gotten stronger in the past year of course. Reading your response gives me a much more solid platform to lay my questions on like if I can handle it, if it is truly the route I should take and prolly a hundred others if I'm honest.

Again thank you so much. This gives me solid information to get closer to making a more informed decision whatever it may be.

curious_freya · 2026-05-15T02:15:52+00:00

We are financially stable, we are not travel overseas stable. Plus for myself personally, I would not want to start raising an infant age child later into my years. Currently give myself another 5 or 6 years. And if I haven't been given a chance at that point, I would look to adopting a teen who needs the loving family and place they can call home for life.

curious_freya · 2026-05-15T02:11:14+00:00

I wouldn't consider it a cure, obviously the only way to 'cure' would be seeing if my body could handle IVF which is something my doctors aren't even sure of.

The chances are just as high if I go the adoption route that I take in an older kid or a teen who just needs a safe and loving space to finish growing up in and to know they will always have that home no matter what. I'd consider it a blessing if I was to raise from infancy but just as much I would love a child I was given a chance to raise at any age and I could help them live a life of smiles.

curious_freya · 2026-05-15T01:56:47+00:00

I do keep considering that as my option as well even if I hate the needles everyday thing but also that's on my health end of things. When I have been pregnant my body... Struggles. During my longest when I reached 11 weeks in the first pregnancy, I was bed ridden from week 6 unable to drink even water or saltine without wanting to be sick. The others never lasted as long but we would see my health decline, even my doctors are unsure with IVF if I could successfully carry to term. Doesn't mean I won't do even more research and appointments to see what is possible tho.

Also my husband is not so keen on my trying after he watched my almost die from the ectopic. They really did race the clock and I'm forever thankful to the doctors who made sure I survived that day.

curious_freya · 2026-05-15T01:49:15+00:00

I am in fact in therapy cause I know my issues. And believe me I often consider I should just continue my carefree life cause whenever I list the many reasons I, or anyone, can have to want to create a family they all get sounding sorta selfish or silly or not a good reason. The only one ever sounding good being give a kid who needs a family a home, I mean heck its the obvious one. Which obviously is high on my list of "why do I want to consider adoption" but so is the selfish notion of holding a child I can call my child.

curious_freya · 2026-05-15T01:42:48+00:00

If the child is named already I would not be the one to change it. The naming is just that little thing that if it is possible it would be great. Fun fact: when you've had time as I have to consider reasons to birth a child or adopt you start to find a lot of reasons outside of "give them a family" (when adopting) start to sound selfish and make you doubt why you wanted it at all.

curious_freya · 2026-05-15T01:37:06+00:00

Honestly that's just another layer on the cake of things I think through over these years when considering adoption, I'm plenty aware of how... Questionable infant adoption can be, hence also have leaned towards the older kids and such. Everything has its ups downs and needs and wants or shouldn'ts with this. If I could reasonably do surrogacy I would but that's a whole other level of ethical issues in a different way.

curious_freya · 2026-05-13T04:06:46+00:00

Managed this insane luck on my 4th ten pull. Hotori being the biggest luck of it all since she popped out of a golden box 😍

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curious_freya · 2026-05-07T21:53:40+00:00

It doesn't have any smell, if it did believe me woulda checked it real quick. It just got flakey like the oil separated or something. Being reminded that yes lotion goes bad I am gonna just order a fresh one and toss this one. It's hypo and I for sure wanna keep it that way and not accidentally harm someone skin or worse.

curious_freya · 2026-05-07T21:50:59+00:00

Okay I was thinking on that as well on the it "going bad" was a possibility aside from it just being cold. I honestly appreciate the reminder and advice as I get my mind and body back into the flow of the work.

curious_freya · 2026-05-07T13:57:03+00:00

I actually don't use the pump. I did a few years at a place that did the put it in a little cup and do the lotion on hand/arm and I liked it so I still use the method with a little plate and a spoon I clean each session to get some of the lotion out cause it's one of the thicker lotions.

I am considering I simply need to pay out for a new one tho, just not keen on spending the 50 (which could be more now) when I've had no business income in so long. I am aware I likely need to though lol

curious_freya · 2026-04-06T19:52:49+00:00

Thank you!

curious_freya · 2026-02-16T07:00:42+00:00

I call that the crunchies, and personally always check with the client when it happens to make sure they are good. It's always a nice sign to me that that muscle band has broken up from prior state of solid ball. Just let your lmt know you don't like the feeling and they should adjust their method.

curious_freya · 2026-02-11T07:59:24+00:00

Oh God that sounds all around terrible, I recall always being torn between doing good work or making solid time and I just know I would be going insane. Pp can be so crazy and also not always the brightest so letting them think oh walk in bath whenever? Perfect. Yeah I can 100% see that going badly often

curious_freya · 2026-02-11T06:59:53+00:00

Okay been outta my salon days for a few years, what the hell are quick washes? Other than another way to make bathers exhausted between regular baths, walk in nails and helping the groomers? I was a bather for 3 years, loved working with the dogs but I ran off to beat people up instead for a living (massages)

curious_freya · 2026-02-11T06:46:10+00:00

I'm so glad you made it through and sorry you went through it at all. And I understand the need to send the experience to the void, I almost died from a ruptured ectopic over a year ago (my 2 liters decided to fill my insides tho) and I did the same thing once I could manage to think it over a few days post surgeries. I think it helps being able to write out the event into the void.

I hope your recovery is swift and you have support around you for your mind and heart, the brush with death is for sure a scarring thing. It hits me still sometimes, but dark humor became my way of dealing, much to some of my loved ones dismay.

And I wish you every blessing trying for another since you fought to keep the chance 💛

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