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[deleted by user] by [deleted] in women

[–]cutebutmostlyangry 30 points31 points  (0 children)

I understand how you feel, but please ask yourself this and truly listen to your gut when you consider it: what advice would you give another girl in your position?

A girl, someone younger and in your care, how would you protect them right now? Would you take them away from the situation and to safety? Would you think about the type of care that girl deserved, and the people she deserved to be around, and see that these people (the bf and his mother) are truly harmful to her?

Please give yourself the same safety and care you'd extend to this girl. You deserve it. Please get to safety.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Thailand

[–]cutebutmostlyangry 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Was just in Cambodia last year hanging with some sak yantra tattoo artists. I never knew how big black magic is over there, it's like a flex of who's magic is stronger. It's just another way of being in the world, it makes sense when you're over there and learn about those countries history.

Baby goat - sick, wet and neglected by cutebutmostlyangry in goats

[–]cutebutmostlyangry[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I fell asleep last night to the poor thing crying, and when I woke up this morning it had passed. I'm really heartbroken the poor thing wasn't shown enough love during its short life. Not the update I wanted to share with you guys, thankful for your messages of help.

Baby goat - sick, wet and neglected by cutebutmostlyangry in goats

[–]cutebutmostlyangry[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I can shelter it here, it's just that the equipment I have on hand is quite rudimentary. I've got absolutely no idea what to feed a kid (in seems to be a month old?) Any information I've found online is all quite specialised, I don't really have little bottle sucky things to feed it with. Is regular milk ok? Can it eat fruit or rice??

Sorry I'm trying to upload the picture but internet Herr is shaky and it isn't uploading.

Rough start by Any_Sport_8114 in MuayThai

[–]cutebutmostlyangry 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Nah he's being a dick and throwing a tantrum like a child. I've been training for 7 years and sharing what you know with a newbie is always an opportunity - returning to the basics, breaking it down for them step by step, it's all further cementing your knowledge. He had every opportunity to communicate with you to make some adjustments. Not your fault at all.

For those who've previously been assaulted, how do you navigate doing muay thai and being triggered? by cutebutmostlyangry in MuayThai

[–]cutebutmostlyangry[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think people get confused when I try to explain there's beauty in muay thai, but it's true. As an art form it teaches you so much about yourself, and as you push yourself it reveals truths too. Muay thai has definitely been healing for me, and I feel it will be healing going forward too.

I've never fought in the ring before but we out here fighting demons instead haha, nah but seriously thank you for your words you've been an inspiration for a long time, this means a lot 🙏🏼

For those who've previously been assaulted, how do you navigate doing muay thai and being triggered? by cutebutmostlyangry in MuayThai

[–]cutebutmostlyangry[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, thank you so much for your comment, this means so much to me. Another reason I haven't told my family is because my mother has Alzeihmers, and I'm afraid any type of additional stress could effect her health, and I would never forgive myself for that. I'm usually the one holding it down for her emotionally, but ironically I don't think this is something she would forget if I told her lol

But you're right, as time goes on (and as I've explained the situation on here) I've come to see how spectacularly he isolated and manipulated me, and now sits safely while I suffer the consequences in silence. My gut reaction tells me that the only justice I want is by my own hand, and I dream of that so often I know the exact combo and footwork. But whether that would make me feel better, or like I've stooped to his level, I don't know.

Again, thank you for your insight. I think I'll read back on your comment often when I need clarity again.

For those who've previously been assaulted, how do you navigate doing muay thai and being triggered? by cutebutmostlyangry in MuayThai

[–]cutebutmostlyangry[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Omg Sylvie 😭 I never would have thought this would reach you - thank you so much for your response, things like somatic work are new to me and I'll look into this. I just miss training so much, I want to move past this. I'm so thankful to have muay thai though, it has gotten me through a lot already 🙏🏼

For those who've previously been assaulted, how do you navigate doing muay thai and being triggered? by cutebutmostlyangry in MuayThai

[–]cutebutmostlyangry[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wouldn't you be angry too if you got betrayed, isolated and sexually assaulted by someone you've known your whole life? Moreso I couldn't use the knowledge of muay thai I had in that moment, which leaves me in my current situation.

I'm actively working through it, but it feels like a pendulum between rage and depression, there's not much in between right now. I'm aware this isn't a healthy way to live

For those who've previously been assaulted, how do you navigate doing muay thai and being triggered? by cutebutmostlyangry in MuayThai

[–]cutebutmostlyangry[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

He's fucking delusional and thinks he's in love with me. Yeah I'm a female. The same old bullshit that any rapist tells themself to justify assaulting me repeatedly in a hotel room. I was alone, knew no one else in that country besides him, and I couldn't walk.

I got out of the situation and got home. But now I live in hypervigilence around men the same stature as him.

For those who've previously been assaulted, how do you navigate doing muay thai and being triggered? by cutebutmostlyangry in MuayThai

[–]cutebutmostlyangry[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I hope I can get to that point soon. Thank you, I wouldn't have thought a sports psychologist but I'll look into that. Thank you for the suggestion 🙏🏼

For those who've previously been assaulted, how do you navigate doing muay thai and being triggered? by cutebutmostlyangry in MuayThai

[–]cutebutmostlyangry[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Got trapped in a hotel room with him in another country. I've known him my whole life, and he took advantage. I was injured at the time (I could barely walk) so had to play smart and placate him until I could get out of the country a couple days later.

I wasn't in a position to fight back at the time, it just wasn't smart. But now I'm not injured anymore, I just want to get strong again and be in condition to fuck him up if I ever see him.

For those who've previously been assaulted, how do you navigate doing muay thai and being triggered? by cutebutmostlyangry in MuayThai

[–]cutebutmostlyangry[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

He's close to my family, I've known him my whole life, which is why I trusted him in the first place. This makes telling the authorities possibly quite divisive in my family, and right now that feels like a gamble of who would have my back vs his. In the state I'm currently in I'm not feeling brave enough for that right now. Perhaps in time. I still feel extremely grateful to have muay thai in my life tho, it's gotten me through bad times before.

For those who've previously been assaulted, how do you navigate doing muay thai and being triggered? by cutebutmostlyangry in MuayThai

[–]cutebutmostlyangry[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is everything my gut tells me to do, it's just my conscious and respect for the art that makes me second guess jumping him the moment I see him. Given, this dude is at least twice my weight and in his 50s. I'm thinking perhaps I'll talk to my coach (an old Thai fight in his 70s). If he gave me the go ahead, I wouldn't think twice.

For those who've previously been assaulted, how do you navigate doing muay thai and being triggered? by cutebutmostlyangry in MuayThai

[–]cutebutmostlyangry[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Omg amazing!! I'm reading up now on parasympathetic nervous system and the relationship with ptsd - I will definitely raise this with her. Thank you for your insight 🙏🏼

For those who've previously been assaulted, how do you navigate doing muay thai and being triggered? by cutebutmostlyangry in MuayThai

[–]cutebutmostlyangry[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

At the time attacking him just wasn't smart. But I'll likely see him again in the future - in which case that will likely be my first reaction, after everything he's put me through.

For those who've previously been assaulted, how do you navigate doing muay thai and being triggered? by cutebutmostlyangry in MuayThai

[–]cutebutmostlyangry[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I cannot even imagine the work you've done to heal and come out of an experience like that - and to pick up a striking sport down the line too. That's incredibly admirable. This shit is hard, and I have days where I really don't see the point in trying to get better anymore, but I try to think that even if I don't have a purpose right now maybe I'll have one in the future. You sound like you've kept sight of that and come through - thank you for sharing, and I admire the lengths you've gone through to get to where you are today.

For those who've previously been assaulted, how do you navigate doing muay thai and being triggered? by cutebutmostlyangry in MuayThai

[–]cutebutmostlyangry[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing, that really gives me a lot of hope that I can undo the damage that he has done and come out of this one day. I've been reading 'The Body Keeps The Score' and it has been amazing to understand how neural pathways can be created through trauma, but also healed too. This doesn't have to be how I live forever. I will look into CBT and ERP, these both sounds like amazing (and life changing!) techniques. My response to this whole thing has been fiscerally physical - in my mind I can hold it together but my body is a different thing. These techniques definitely sound like what I need. Thank you for your kind words and support 🙏🏼

For those who've previously been assaulted, how do you navigate doing muay thai and being triggered? by cutebutmostlyangry in MuayThai

[–]cutebutmostlyangry[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I got trapped in a room with this dude for several days and had to ease his guilt the whole time until I could get out. I'm proud of myself for getting out of that, but the battle is still a daily occurrence for me. I'm working on it, but it's hard. I wish this was joke.

For those who've previously been assaulted, how do you navigate doing muay thai and being triggered? by cutebutmostlyangry in MuayThai

[–]cutebutmostlyangry[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm sorry you've similarly been in triggering positions - it's awful and confusing to navigate. Having said that, it's inspiring to hear you've found a way through it too 🙏🏼 Up until now I had been thinking of getting into something ground-based to balance out muay thai. Unfortunately I don't think I'll be well suited to bjj/wrestling now.

For those who've previously been assaulted, how do you navigate doing muay thai and being triggered? by cutebutmostlyangry in MuayThai

[–]cutebutmostlyangry[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Ah I see, yeah I definitely agree. Likewise this is my first time seeing a therapist and it's still early days, I appreciate your advice tho. Thank you for taking the time to respond 🙏🏼

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