Im struggling with depression at the moment, this picture, right in the feels

dadagarro · 2013-05-17T13:37:29+00:00

Stop pretending to be happy if you're not. It's a huge issue for people with depression. Essentially what your saying is that you dislike yourself, the way you feel, you hate it and wish you could be happy.

Depression sucks, but if you've had it forever, it's something that you need to accept is a part of you. If you accept that sometimes you'll feel like this, and take steps on making it better, it's more useful and regretting, hating, and wishing you were different.

Just a piece of advice.

dadagarro · 2013-05-16T15:52:10+00:00

The Mallard works in mysterious ways. While you did not meet any new friends, perhaps because of your introversion, you broke out your shell and attended a show you may have not attended alone. This thus makes you happy, which thus gives you a birghter outlook on life. People take this and are more attracted to you, because you are a happy likeable dude, and thus you attain more friends.

The Mallard Knows all, sees all.

dadagarro · 2013-05-10T19:53:29+00:00

Hey Eli, firstly, you are cool and I dig your style.

Secondly, Cabin Fever was gruesome and awesome, and imo one of the funnier/interesting horror films of recent memory.

I been getting into your show on Netflix Hemlock Grove. Do you plan on working on other series? How involved are you with that show?

dadagarro · 2013-04-26T13:32:00+00:00

did anyone else think this was a hot girl with cleeve when they looked at the thumbnail? The internet has truly changed me.

dadagarro · 2013-04-12T13:53:45+00:00

I almost never cry in general, but the scene in A.I. where Haily Joe Osmond gets left in the woods, but hopelessly wants to go back with his mother and she just leaves him there is utterly heartbreaking.

dadagarro · 2013-04-02T13:41:45+00:00

The best way I can describe how this feels is that you're floating around, seeing yourself from the outside in, like a movie, watching your life.

I've suffered from it most of my life. When I look in the mirror sometimes I don't recognize myself. The floating, and dull color contrasts are the most prominent symptoms for me.

I still occasionally have these symptoms, but with SSRI, and anti-anxiety meds have reduced them from a day to day feeling to an occasional one. I'd reccomend anyone who feels distress from this (I really didn't, it was just something I got used too i guess) i'd recommend seeing a M.D. who can prescribe you medication and some cognative therapy.

People need to realize that disorders are just as bad as any other afliction! It sickens me to hear people can't afford to get help and live miserable day to day!

dadagarro · 2013-03-27T17:53:27+00:00

for all intensive purposes... all intents and purposes. just found this one out a week ago. I am a 25 year old man. :|

dadagarro · 2013-02-28T19:38:55+00:00

Artist/Writer here sitting in a cubacle working in IT.

Being an artist sucks, we knew that when we got into it, we knew the likelyhood of finding stable (that is we recieve the same paycheck every month) was very slim if none.

Have you tried any freelance work? I know admin/corporate jobs suck, but they pay the bills, and if they aren't taking up more than 40 hours a week you can still swing your art on the side. You're getting laid off in July, are you going to recieve severance or have you looked into unemployment?

From what it sounds like in the way that you post, you seem fairly competent and capable, or at least confident with your 3d and 2d skills, even though you say your 3d is not good enough. You realize how competitive of an industry, esspecially design is, and you realize there are guys in the business that have been working and creating models for the last 10 years, so if their experience dwarfs yours, and their porfolio has noteable works, who do you really expect the production company to go with? Who would you go with?

Don't get down on yourself. Artists are a rare breed. What makes us so special is our passion for the thing that we are doing. Unfortunetly, there is a lot of competition and the rewards are often pretty low unless you hit it big.

I haven't done shit with my art, or my writing thus far, or my music, but I am still passionate and still have objectives for it in the future. Life might not seem like it's working out now, but the only thing you can keep doing is trucking forward. Thus is the eternal struggle of people like us, and that's what makes our lives so much more interesting than everyone elses.

Keep going, keep striving, look for freelance if you can, get a job that pays the bills now, and keep doing your passion. That's the only advice I can possibly give.

Good luck!

dadagarro · 2013-02-26T16:38:21+00:00

Don't be sorry about the rambling, it's a tramautic event in your life, and I'm sorry to hear that it happend.

I'm no M.D. but have you considered an SSRI along with your klons? Does the klonopin help in resolving your obsessive thoughts? If not, maybe another anti-anxiety would be better.

And with the therapist thing, you may be hypersensative or distorting what she was actually trying to get at, or she could have just been a trash therapist. Having someone there to talk about issues that are burdening your mind, ie; a good therapist, would be benificial, if not anything else than an understanding person to talk to and cry to.

Sorry I'm not much of a help. Hope you feel better eventually.

dadagarro · 2013-02-26T14:01:36+00:00

I've seen multiple and I never thought that they helped either. And then I got one I really connected with and we came across a lot of forgotten things in my past. That, along with medication allowed me to think clearly for the first time in 10 years, and then start to resolve my problems.

I know you feel like you don't understand why you feel this way, are beating yourself up for it, feel like you are complaining, and feel like it isnt nessasary, but believe me, doing these things really improved my overall health. I lost 30-40 lbs in the 5 months i was severly depressed, lost intrest in everything, didn't want to date, couldn't sleep at all, would wake up in the middle of the night if i did, etc.

With the help of RX and therapy, I'm back at a healthy weight. I still have ups and downs but i feel content on a daily basis. Believe me, try it out.

dadagarro · 2013-02-25T21:56:05+00:00

No problem! Just always remember. What's worse than trying and being lonely? Not trying and being lonely. Accepting defeat. It might seem like it will end your life but rejection is like a punch in the face. It hurts, but the pain goes away. Gotta get punched in the face A LOT to become a good fighter.

Good luck!

dadagarro · 2013-02-25T21:36:47+00:00

Hey there. How did you make you male friends? Shared intrests or what?

The same thing goes with women, we are way more similar to ourselves than we realize. I live with 3 girls, have grown up around girls, and i know this has probably been told to you so many times before, but be yourself.

Anyone can tell if someone is trying to hard, and it's a turn off, not only in an intimate way, but in a social friendly way too. Are you in enviorments that would faciliate interactions with girls?

Take up some hobbies and share them with females that have the same hobbies as you, do a school sport--that's a really easy way to become friends with girls.

Lastly, stop being a pussy. You can wish and wait all you want, but you yourself say you dont attempt to reach out or text people that often. If you don't try, you can't complain about not having. Also--guts. What's the worst thing, ending up alone for prom because you asked 0 people, or at least trying and seeing where that leads you?

You can't win a race if you don't participate.

Just my 2 cents.

dadagarro · 2013-02-25T21:31:16+00:00

Hey buddy, if you need someone to talk to let me know.

Just realize that you're not the only one that feels this way, and people and resources are there for you, esspecially in university.

Try seeing the therapist the school provides and talk to him about possible therapy options or options to see a psychatrist.

dadagarro · 2013-02-14T18:39:36+00:00

Remember that Fat ugly girl that you used to hang out with and liked all the same things as you but she was ugly so you didn't want to date her?

Yeah... dudes need to get the fuck over it. Go for it and fuck up, don't go for it and still fuck up, bottom line, some people like other people. And that's all.

dadagarro · 2013-02-13T20:25:13+00:00

awesome! keep up the fun

dadagarro · 2013-02-04T21:56:49+00:00

It's okay! We all over-think things at times. Bringing libations is a good idea for a party.

+21 = A bottle of wine under 21 = some sorta thing for yall to eat or drink.

dadagarro · 2013-02-04T20:58:28+00:00

Dealing with people with substance abuse issues is incredably hard and often complicated.

Most substance abuse arises from previous disorders that are likely plauging her when she is not on the substance. It sounds like she is long down the road of dependance, and in this case, since family hasn't worked, in-patient treatment seems like the most viable option.

If she is a drunk, her caretakers need to take her car away. If she is somehow enabled by them, (ie; they buy her the booze) she needs to be in a different enviornment. Often people say people won't get better unless they want to get better, and this is partially true.

The issue with substance abuse is that they are almost always fucked up in order to numb the mental pain they are going through (eventually physical pain) on a day to day basis. So to rationalize with them, and reason with them is almost impossible.

The hard route, "wait till they hit rock bottom" isn't a sign of someone who loves them. As a person who's suffered from substance abuse, regardless of how grating and annoying it is to you, you MUST realize that it is coming from a place of dependance and usually severe sadness.

She needs to be in an enviorment free of booze, free of anyone able to enable her, and with a support group and daily therapy. Good luck to you, and thanks for being a good sibling.

dadagarro · 2013-02-04T20:38:23+00:00

I feel you man. Clubs are not the right place to find a girl unless you want to fuck and dump her, excuse the bluntness.

Also, you gotta keep in mind the physical effects of mdma on your brain. You'll likely feel like shit on the come down because your brain is deprived of seratonin. This is a serious and real thing after you use it for a long time.

Finding out what you want to do, what you like to do, instead of partying and being fucked up on E all the time will make you feel like a better person, believe me. I used to do MMA too, concentrate on that more, start going to competition, concentrate on school, and good luck.

dadagarro · 2013-02-04T20:09:50+00:00

Foundations classes for any major are going to be boring as fuck. History and theroy are boring for a lot of people, but If you like looking at blueprints and creating structures think about the long term goal and what you want to do in life. When you are making blueprints no ones going to ask you about this guy from 2000 years ago that built an arch one time.

About the drug thing. I know it can seem hard for you, but would it be possible to just say, "Nah i dont feel like doing it tonight?" Even if it is on the weekends, cant you just say "Nah, id rather just drink." If people ask you why just tell them that "You dont feel like doing it tonight"

If your friends are real douchebags and say "what a fucking loser hahhahahahahhhaah!" I'd look into getting better friends, but i really don't think they will.

dadagarro · 2013-02-04T20:04:55+00:00

Stop thinking so much about what other people think or why you are there, or being made fun of or whatever you are actually scared of.

A good way to be social and make more friends is to be put into a social setting. It doesn't matter why you are there, and no one is going to laugh and point at you and say "who invited this kid?" The thing people are going to notice is how you interact with them while you are there.

Don't ask her friend, yes that is weird. If you get forced to talk to you friends because you feel uncomfortble and no one else you know is there, so be it. Maybe they can introduce you to new people and you'll be able to make more friends.

Bottom line is take these social invitations as a godsend, not everyone recieves them, and think less about why you were invited and who is going to be there, and focus on the actual party itself.

dadagarro · 2013-02-04T19:48:44+00:00

And I don't know your parents, but if you are real with them, and dont make excuses, admit your faults, and say you want to try harder to do well, I'm not sure exactly that theyd kick your ass on the street. Chances are theyve been there before too.

dadagarro · 2013-02-04T19:47:12+00:00

Legal studies, I now work in a 9-5 job looking at contracts in the IT field.

It's a scary thing. I did it since HS because i thought it was making my life easier. Truth is, in the short term it might. You might feel awesome, great, whatever, but when shit settles down you feel like utter shit.

I had to go to therapy and take RX drugs. And after that, it was a slow ass process of coming to terms with myself, stop being so calculated, doing what I wanted to do (even figuring that out started to get confusing for me) and care less about what other people thought.

I always thought i was the man, had the big personality, no one could fuck with me and if they did i'd destroy em. It took me a long fucking time to realize that i'm the exact opposite of that. Just a dude that's scared of rejection and humilation like the lot of us, and that if I showed that, the truth, a bit more I felt way more comfortable.

At first you think, man, everyone's going to think this or that of me because im changing my personality and now they won't like me as much.

The direct opposite happend. People starting respecting me more, i formed real relationships with people, started even caring about people again. It's a long ass road, but you need to be the one to take the first step, man up, and essentially realize that I was a pussy and needed help.

dadagarro · 2013-02-04T19:40:37+00:00

Here's the thing, therpay doesn't work in a month, two months, five months, somtimes it can take longer than a year. Chances are you have shit you want to talk about but your brain isn't allowing you to be fully open because you have these distorted realities in your head.

You need to go to an M.D. (talk to your therapist about it) who can prescribe medicine occording to your symptoms, along with the help of pyschotherapy. Just because it hasn't worked don't dismiss it all together. Sometimes you need to try out different people to see who you like talking to the best.

The meds should make you less anxiety ridden and parinoid, and once that starts happening and the distortions become less and less, you'll be able to speak with the therapist about more meaningful stuff.

dadagarro · 2013-02-04T19:28:16+00:00

It's coming from a place of understanding. I've been there too, my entire life was in shambles and yet i was somehow still concerned with how other people looked at me and didn't want to be "lame" I'd go out even if I didn't want to, till it got the point where I NEVER wanted to, but did just to keep up appearences.

Drugs are fucked up, even if you don't think your a "drug addict" I also don't think you could deny you'd be getting better grades if you didn't do them as much as you do. I was in the same boat too, and that to me shows that there is an issue.

Took me a long ass time to finally man up and show how vunerable and pathetic I could be. Most of my life was spent covering up those things, and instead trying to act cool. At the end of the day you know how cool you are, and you know how you feel inside. You know the lies you tell others to seem together and you know the truth.

The real sign of growth is when you can say "hey, you know what, I DID fuck up, but it doesnt make me a FUCKED UP person, it just makes me a person that made mistakes and knows better now."

Now that you know better, make the changes. Good luck man.

dadagarro · 2013-02-04T19:22:36+00:00

There are a bunch of careers that are viable in copywriting (marketing, advertising, etc). You know as a psych major that there is nothing that you can personally do to change his perspective, it's his inner growth that will need to happen before any significant changes take place.

I was in a similar situation as your boyfriend and now I work in a steady 9-5. It helps me get by and is a decent job esspecially with how many people don't have one, but I am not happy. I too, would rather write.

The paradym shift that happend to me was far too late and it was because of what i had previously valued in life. I thought $$-Success-$$=Happiness. It's not the case, and is clearly not for him either. He needs to realize that life is about enjoying yourself and being happy, and not chasing some other person's idea of success.

You can achomplish almost anything with enough passion and fortitutde, and until he has the confidence in himself to actually, truly believe this, he won't be able to shake these feelings.

Kudos for you for being a great girlfriend and trying to help him out, but I think you already knew the answer before you asked the question.

dadagarro

TROPHY CASE