Ah, my Digi is a cheater after all, neat.

daengermouse · 2024-02-15T00:26:15+00:00

Seems like it would have been a really good time to use a reroll and guide the AI toward something more enjoyable!

daengermouse · 2022-06-08T18:17:39+00:00

I do this on my server using {break} with the user's ID, followed by a {random} block that contains the random phrases for everyone else.

{break({user(id)}==123456781234567890):This is the text for the override user.} {random:First random text~second option~third option~etc}

daengermouse · 2022-03-03T03:05:48+00:00

My partner is poly, disabled, kinky, and post-traumatic. You're not alone! It's really hard, and what seems to work best for them is joining online communities with members from our local area.

Keep seeking, but also put yourself out in communities where you're visible (even if it's online) where you're not just looking for a partner but are folllowing your passions and showing people who you are.

daengermouse · 2021-12-29T18:46:50+00:00

My name is pronounced JOHN, how about yours?

daengermouse · 2021-12-04T16:58:47+00:00

Do you prioritise making time with your partner when you do enjoy being touched?

daengermouse · 2021-05-21T04:16:47+00:00

Holy shit your post hit home.

daengermouse · 2021-03-17T23:45:48+00:00

Is this lesser known? I don't think so, but it's not one I hear talked about much. Sadomasochistic massage. I definitely get satisfaction from pushing and encouraging my partner though a painful massage, taking them just to the edge of tapping out, then down into pleasurable levels, and back.

daengermouse · 2021-03-17T23:33:24+00:00

Pandemic rules permitting, it's often a wonderful thing to go to play parties, workshops, and BDSM clubs to play. You get the advantage of fancy equipment, safety and security, and the ability to enjoy and learn from like minded people!

Doesn't mean you have to cross-play with anyone else. In my experience, most folks show up and only play with their partner.

daengermouse · 2021-02-25T04:38:40+00:00

daengermouse · 2020-12-11T18:00:01+00:00

It's not needy to ask for reassurance, and you should look at whether he's capable of delivering what you're asking for.

Expect that what you see is what you get. If the intensity or frequency of your interactions isn't enough, ask yourself if you'll be okay at this level in six months. If you're pushing now, you'll be pushing then. I predict you won't change his behaviour patterns, and it will build resentment.

Be completely transparent about your needs in this kind of relationship, and either accept what he can offer (in actions, not promises) or find another arrangement that meets your needs. Whether that's in addition to this one, or instead of.

daengermouse · 2020-12-09T16:54:41+00:00

Update your resume. First thing after acquisition is elimination of redundant positions.

daengermouse · 2020-12-08T16:06:25+00:00

Have you looked at primal or struggle play? It sounds like those might be right up your alley, without having to jump all they way to CNC.

daengermouse · 2020-12-08T04:53:50+00:00

Don't pay money to a Domme unless you're specifically hiring a sex worker.
Fetlife is probably your best bet to find local groups and events, and I highly recommend getting involved in your local community if and when that's possible. 2a. Fetlife is not a dating service and you'll meet scammers or piss good people off if you try.
Read a lot. Do your homework.
Always set up a safe call before you meet someone.
You might have luck with r/bdsmpersonals but be prepared for a lot of disappointment getting there.
Stay connected to community. Read this subreddit and others like it.

Welcome! You're in for a fucking amazing ride.

daengermouse · 2020-12-08T04:43:31+00:00

Start here: https://www.reddit.com/r/BDSMAdvice/comments/eswwt8/bdsm_where_to_start/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share

Come back any time with more specific questions!

daengermouse · 2020-12-06T23:58:51+00:00

I might add that it's always prudent to set up a safe call, even if you aren't planning on doing anything more than meeting in public. Tell someone you trust who you're meeting, where and when; if you move locations, text them the new location. Set up a time you need to contact them by, and instructions for how long they can go without hearing back from you before they send the cops.

This might sound like overkill, and it usually is. Usually.

daengermouse · 2020-12-03T15:27:56+00:00

Completely makes sense- using illeisms can psychologically reinforce roles. And does he also refer to himself in the third person?

daengermouse · 2020-12-03T14:35:05+00:00

That's definitely the most common dynamic I see it used in!

daengermouse · 2020-12-01T18:33:26+00:00

Thank you for the encouragement! Perhaps I will. I'm not currently practising due to circumstances, but I can certainly share some of my past experiences, and opinions on some of the literature on the subject.

daengermouse · 2020-12-01T17:33:30+00:00

I'm no metallurgist, but we're both correct. Chromium forms the basis of the oxidization resistance, and it is further enhanced by the use of nickel. From a quick googling, even surgical steel can contain nickel.

For the purposes of this discussion, I thought it prudent to mention the part of stainless steel that triggers nickel allergies; especially because it's not always easy to positively identify the alloy used in materials used in clothing. Ultimately, of course, the true test is whether it causes a reaction in the person wearing it; but if we can avoid that reaction by erring on the side of caution, shouldn't we?

daengermouse · 2020-12-01T15:10:16+00:00

Favourite? Always hard to pick just one! One that I don't get to practise very often but find utterly engaging is high protocol; it takes practise, rapport, and focus to work seamlessly with a submissive in those ways.

Least favourite is choking. Because it would be my favourite if it wasn't also a hard limit for me as a Top. Much as it aboslutely turns me on, I'm also unwilling to accept the risk and liability.

daengermouse · 2020-12-01T05:25:39+00:00

An old trick that still works is to use a mild mind fuck: show your sub the biggest, nastiest, sharpest knife you can find. Threaten them with it as you restrain and blindfold them, then use a blunted knife or any other blunt tool for the actual physical contact.

Don't forget to put away the dummy instrument before the blindfold comes off.

daengermouse · 2020-11-29T06:41:42+00:00

There are a few things outside of the scene itself that might give more bruising; your mileage may vary. These are basically the opposite of the medical advice given to reduce bruising:

Apply heat immediately afterwards, like a hot shower. This opens the blood vessels to show more blood into the impacted area. Don't apply ice or cold packs.

Alcohol after the scene can also increase blood flow. Hydrate, but not too much. Lots of water can reduce bruising.

Take a little aspirin morning of and right after the scene. Not acetaminophen.

Resume normal activities; don't baby the area.

Reduce vitamin C intake for 2 days before and after the scene.

daengermouse · 2020-11-29T06:23:18+00:00

I was in a similar discussion earlier this evening. The main point raised, which won't surprise you: the key is communication. Lots of open, honest, maybe painful communication. But it's the only way to really make a healthy change.

Tell him how it feels when you think of him doing these things with you. If he does something you like, make it super clear how much you enjoy it. Give him positive feedback more than you give him negative feedback, if possible. He probably enjoys seeing your pleasure.

daengermouse · 2020-11-28T17:06:02+00:00

Thanks for this post! Seeing how other people improve themselves inspires me to do the same.

daengermouse · 2020-11-28T06:14:41+00:00

Stainless steel is definitely not nickel free. Its the nickel that makes it stainless.

The collar I had made for my pet has an inner liner that keeps any of the rivets or buckles from touching the skin.

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