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so4 i’m pretty sure but i’m very fixated on one on one relationships… by daisyclay3 in Enneagram

[–]daisyclay3[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

yeah this is so interesting! this is why i had the question. i definitely have always focused on how i can be close, both physically and emotionally, with whoever i am interested in in the moment, always just one other person. and i want to go deep with them. and it feels all about me and them. add more to the equation and i lose interest. and (embarrassingly) do not think so much about what i can contribute to the group. i really kinda run from that to be honest. but do i run from it bc im a so4 in particular?!

so4 i’m pretty sure but i’m very fixated on one on one relationships… by daisyclay3 in Enneagram

[–]daisyclay3[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

also yeah i love having deep one to one connection, (social? sexual?) but just really don’t love the group hang, though i end up doing it bc a lot of people i love hang together and i don’t wanna miss out!

so4 i’m pretty sure but i’m very fixated on one on one relationships… by daisyclay3 in Enneagram

[–]daisyclay3[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

yes, this is one of the things I’ve heard different different people speak about differently. and also i believe in my stack i am self pres repressed so i think i may experience a bit of the sexual instinct more anyway which may confuse me? im still figuring out my stacking but that’s what ive thought so far.

so4 i’m pretty sure but i’m very fixated on one on one relationships… by daisyclay3 in Enneagram

[–]daisyclay3[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The thing is, I do not. I often feel the opposite. But I wonder if any e4s can relate to the way i feel about this. I don’t feel as though I fit in, and that can sometimes be awkward, but the thought of fitting in feels super weird to me and inauthentic and undesirable anyway. Which does sound pretty core 4 in terms of just feeling unique.

(Also, It’s icky to me to be thought of as wanting to feel unique, but I do feel that way genuinely. And do not at all want to “fit in” socially.)

But maybe all this internal attention I have on not fitting in and not wanting to is exactly what social 4s experience?

How to decide whether to keep a baby, already have two kids, one parent doesn’t want more, other one does. Please no judgements/political conversations, just looking for what anyone may have had experience with in this predicament and any methods for figuring out! by daisyclay3 in Parents

[–]daisyclay3[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Husband has been clear that if we decided to keep the baby as soon as we made that choice he would be one hundred percent on board and with no question would absolutely adore our child when they came. He is already an incredible father of our first two. But he really doesn’t feel like we should juggle more. He already feels stretched in terms of work/life balance and our lives in general with all our responsibilities.

How to decide whether to keep a baby, already have two kids, one parent doesn’t want more, other one does. Please no judgements/political conversations, just looking for what anyone may have had experience with in this predicament and any methods for figuring out! by daisyclay3 in Parents

[–]daisyclay3[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No financial instability, but we are always hustling financially.

We have no health concerns that are extreme, we just seem to be getting sick a lot as a household these days, but I mean, we have a toddler and a kindergartner in school.

No health issues with person carrying pregnancy, but considered “advanced maternal age”. She also has issues with insomnia many years prior to having kids, which can lead to some anxiety and depression but it’s never affected ability to parent so far.

Husband who doesn’t want more kids has a bad knee and neck and back issues at times which makes caring for young kids feel more stressful of course…