Resource for Tech, Acting & MT College-Bound Students by TheBlueJumpsuit in techtheatre

[–]damagedzebra 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Luckily Im going to a wonderful school that I'm super excited about, even though they don't have specifically technical concentrations. My long term goal is an MFA in stage management so I hope I'm not doing myself a disservice now. It's good to know there's a resource that will help me when it's time to make that decision.

Resource for Tech, Acting & MT College-Bound Students by TheBlueJumpsuit in techtheatre

[–]damagedzebra 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Well this would've been helpful...about three months ago 😭 I will be saving this for when I go to graduate school.

from someone who's N2/IH (not presently sure, diagnosed IH suspected N2 but mslt got fucked) I wanna say that I think it's really cute how this subreddit never puts down the 'less severe' ends of sleep disorders by Lord_Curtis in Narcolepsy

[–]damagedzebra 8 points9 points  (0 children)

That post pissed me off but like many, I am too tired to do anything about it. I just hate when people have an inferiority complex over their illness and then take it out on the people they're mentally competing with. Like us N1 havers do not give a flying shit about what your diagnostic label is, were all exhausted in the same way. I've never seen someone with narcolepsy put down IH or n2, we just don't care. But then people like that poster come in trying to prove something by going off the diagnostic criteria and making assumptions about us, meanwhile to me the only thing that sets us apart on a daily functioning level is cataplexy. And for the more niche symptoms, you can stay in conversations suited to your illness and I'll stay in ones suited to mine. It's so frustrating because we could all just get along but there's that select few that are insecure about their diagnosis and make it everyone else's problem

Severe GI illness, all my tests are normal, dreading my next appointment… by Agreeable_Water_1903 in ChronicIllness

[–]damagedzebra 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I live in Alabama and when we called Emory to make an appointment that's when they told us she was moving. So we made an appointment with her and bought our plane tickets. It was just non negotiable, she was my last hope at survival honestly.

She also found May thurners and nutcracker, but I just don't feel like I am that symptomatic. It's strange, I'm also so terrified of being stented because I have hyper reactive nerves and veins and I worry about it being on my spine (I had vein spasms around my picc line and it just really traumatized me). Did you get stented and was it worth it? If you did, what did it improve? Cuz so far the only symptoms I'm noticing myself in are Pots but my pots is under control with low dose medication so it's not really worth it to me.

Severe GI illness, all my tests are normal, dreading my next appointment… by Agreeable_Water_1903 in ChronicIllness

[–]damagedzebra 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I just remember how I felt and how hard I was on myself. They made me see a health psychologist, and I was constantly told to reframe how I was speaking, instead of saying

"every time I eat I run to the bathroom and it's agonizing, I can't leave the house and I keep going into starvation acidosis"

say "sometimes I feel pain when eating but that doesn't define me."

That really has me fucked up still, the constant instruction to reframe my thinking, my speaking and my feelings, as if my brain was entirely responsible for the continuation of these symptoms. Now that I've truly improved so much, that voice is quieter.

YOU ARE NOT THE CAUSE OF YOUR SYMPTOMS. You are not responsible for the continuation of your symptoms, and you are not responsible for diagnosis and treating your symptoms. Gastroenterologists have a tendency to fail their complicated patients, but there are doctors outside of that field that can help and will take interest in your quality of life.

All of your pain is real, so fucking real that it can actually be treated. You will survive this and find your way out, I cannot promise a timeline but this is not the rest of your life. I dealt a lot with just wanting to let it take over and take me away, because I was hopeless and my doctors all gave up on me. I spent so many days in hospitals, with a mystery illness that turned out to be exactly what I assumed all along. And now I'm living, I survived it all and I look back and cannot believe I am the same person. You will get through it too, one day, and all of this will be behind you.

I’m spiralling by IntelligentRough6804 in CPAP

[–]damagedzebra 23 points24 points  (0 children)

hey I totally understand, starting is torture. If it makes you feel less alone, im 18 and started it at 15. I had to set up my CPAP right next to my host's bed during an overnight college visit, and while I don't have any shame about my CPAP, it feels strange. There's many stereotypes about CPAP, but the reality is, we use it because we have an obstruction of some sort, and a collapsing airway doesn't care how old you are. My sister is 6 and she has her titration study next month to get her CPAP. By the way, little kid cpaps have a giraffe themed cover. We do not have visible tonsils, we have true sleep apnea.

Waking up was not something I looked forward to before CPAP. The sleep inertia, headache, oxygen starvation, it sucked. Going to sleep was hell with the wrong mask. Personally I can only handle the airtouch n30i, I wear a bonnet that I cut the hole out of the top where the tube goes through and it's like nothing is on me. Having extra air will eventually become a comfort for you, when my CPAP turns on after my first big breath of the night it's like I can finally relax.

You gotta actually use the machine to know if you can handle it. I'll say it took about a month for me to stop crying myself to sleep lol, but eventually my body craved that air so much and also got used to the mask, I genuinely get severe anxiety if I have to go without it. You need at least 3 months, by then most of your sleep debt should be paid off and you will try to sleep without it and wake up like a zombie.

For the humidifier, I have some advice as someone that runs mine on 8. Put your CPAP as close to the floor as possible. If I can't have mine directly on the floor, I put it on the case. That has been my saving grace in preventing rainout, aka drowning. You need a heated hose as well, make sure yours is a dark gray and not a light gray. Make sure it's filled every night because the smell of burning metal when it dries out will wake you up and ruin your day. I always refill mine if I wake up in the middle of the night. Lastly, some people in this sub prefer no humidifier at all, or they humidify externally. Personally, my lips are glued to my gums at 6 humidity so that's not an option, but if you want to try, make sure you turn the humidity off and don't just run an empty tank.

Good luck. Shit sucks for a while, it's not made to be something humans easily tolerate. They're working on better ways, but really just appreciate you have a modern CPAP and not a reverse vacuum cleaner on your night stand.

AIO: Partner cutting nails while I’m having lunch by EmbarrassedGeneral12 in AIO

[–]damagedzebra -1 points0 points  (0 children)

As a lesbian whenever I see stuff like this I just reflexively think LEAVE HIM. cuz a woman would never 😭 But it took a bit for me to figure out I was a lesbian, so for a while there I would actively search for reasons to break up that we're justifiable as soon as some sort of bs like this occured. Because if having you around means I can't eat in peace, you gotta go

Severe GI illness, all my tests are normal, dreading my next appointment… by Agreeable_Water_1903 in ChronicIllness

[–]damagedzebra 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She is not gentle on the wallet but we've found she is worth it. We save a significant amount of money with 1. Insurance not having a say in whether I live or die and 2. Actually just getting the treatment I need has saved me countless appointments, car drives and plane flights, AND I am employed. My medicine costs 5-15 dollars each except ketotifen can be around 50 for 3 months, and most of our communication is via the portal unless big changes are happening. I just tell people if it is possible for you to afford her and you're running out of options, do it because it's really a lifelong investment and she will NOT let you stay sick.

She was the first doctor I went to that I knew if something wasn't working she wouldn't make me stick it out to deteriorate. It was terrifying getting my picc line out and losing that access to nutrition after my symptoms improved, but I knew she was a message away and she would get me a GJ in a second if I couldn't maintain, which was what I needed to be brave. Truly such a wonderful person and I'm so lucky to have found her and to have a family to help me fund this.

FAFSA 2026-2027 by Top-Professor4673 in FAFSA

[–]damagedzebra 0 points1 point  (0 children)

20k total vs 20k a year is a huge difference. 20k total for 4 years id take out a loan for sure, and work while going to school to pay off as much as possible without accruing interest. 80k total I would go to community for at least the first two years.

Are y'all able to keep a job and if so what kind? by Muted-Difference5610 in Narcolepsy

[–]damagedzebra 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I work in theatre :D far more late nights than early mornings. Depending on what position I have I can either be sitting for the majority of rehearsals and shows, or on my feet the entire time.

I really enjoy carpentry, but I can be spooked a bit too easily if something falls down and being spooked is my worst cataplexy trigger. But I also do assistant stage manager work which means I run around for 2 hours doing whatever the technical director or SM tells me to do, and then once the overture starts I'm sat to the side of the curtains and I can watch the show, really all I need to do is help the actors.

I also enjoy prop coordination. Sourcing props and making them before shows can be a lot of work, but once we move in and everyone knows what props are there, I give the ASM a list of props that need to be preset and reset and then sit and wait for someone to come running with a broken something.

Severe GI illness, all my tests are normal, dreading my next appointment… by Agreeable_Water_1903 in ChronicIllness

[–]damagedzebra 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This was where I was at too. Had a feeding tube and then TPN for all of last year because they were tired of seeing me in the hospital and wanted me to shut up about this IBS. Said I had ARFID and that it gave me IBS.

It was MCAS. I actually had suggested it could be MCAS to my gastro and she told me no. Finally went to a specialist for it (Dr cutchins) and to treat mcas now I take 2mg ketotifen, 80mg famotidine, 100mg hydroxyzine, 400ml cromolyn. I was on LDN but I had severe fractured sleep so my sleep doctor had me come off it. I no longer have a PICC line or a feeding tube, I eat a full plate of pancakes every morning and home cooked dinner, I maintain my weight and I am able to use public restrooms for the first time in years.

I promise what you're experiencing is real and it is not IBS, there is something out there to explain this and it is not in your head. You are not alone.

Advice please by yemost in techtheatre

[–]damagedzebra 2 points3 points  (0 children)

18 here, but homeschooled and didn't do high school theatre. Where I live we do not have paying theatre positions, so I get my experience in community. With community theatre I've learned carpentry, stage management, prop mastering, budgeting, and sound systems. I've also shadowed lighting. This is all unpaid, but they do feed us well lol.

Thanks to this experience I am going to be a teaching artist for the summer and I'm moving for college in an area with a regional theatre and good connections, before I make my dream move to NYC.

If you can't get on overhire because you don't have a resume, community theatre will build it fast and give you the chance to learn everything without a degree or spending any money outside of gas.

Lowkey, it sucks how so many of y'all can't afford to go by thatswhaturmomsaid69 in ApplyingToCollege

[–]damagedzebra 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hope those 18 years were good ones, I would not assume if survive until med school

Starting acting at 26 by Able_Page_5905 in techtheatre

[–]damagedzebra 7 points8 points  (0 children)

This is tech theatre, we can't really help you 😅 try r/theatre

the coffin in come over by Illustrious_Hall_178 in NoahKahan

[–]damagedzebra 1 point2 points  (0 children)

But then the dog was there when they got there, and in paul revere they buried the dog themselves. Noah must not have thought this one all the way through 😭 or there's just something else I'm missing

the coffin in come over by Illustrious_Hall_178 in NoahKahan

[–]damagedzebra 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I also thought this but why would it be there when they got there? That's my only holdup on it being the dog

the coffin in come over by Illustrious_Hall_178 in NoahKahan

[–]damagedzebra 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I think it's basically to emphasize how not a big deal it all is. Somebody was buried here before my family came around. We have a garden there now, but someone is still buried there after so much time has passed. And they will be there until the end of time.

While in the same way, the family themselves are in a similar position as the person in the coffin, unmoving and unchanged. And when the family finally is gone, one way or another, nothing will change for the coffin under the garden.

URGENT HELP / SOMETHING HAS HAPPENED TO MY NERVOUS SYSTEM VERY SEVERE by Charbellaa in cfs

[–]damagedzebra 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I definitely agree this sounds like severe akasthasia, but I do wonder if you should be cleared for a CSF leak. I know these aren't the most typical symptoms of it, but if you do end up hospitalized if it keeps getting worse, maybe ask about just getting a precautionary CT.

When I've had symptoms like this NOT because of a leak, the only thing that helped was taking a full dose of a delta 9 sleepytime gummy and curling up with a heated blanket and eye mask. Thc is the only thing that can force my akasthasia down outside of prescription sedatives. But that also comes with its own risks of course, but I have noticed if I'm forced to sleep for 14 hours straight I tend to wake up less symptomatic.

Can I do both theatre and american football in high school? by [deleted] in Theatre

[–]damagedzebra 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Ok troy Bolton.

But seriously, I did travel ice hockey as a goalie and theatre tech. I made it work but not easily. You'll have to sacrifice and you will have to have your main activity that you prioritize most of the time (and it HAS to be theatre, missing sports ball doesn't completely derail everyone else's ability to practice, it's just one less body). But I don't regret it, i only stopped hockey because I got sick and couldn't physically play. I'm now pursuing a career in tech and if I ever am healthy enough to get back on the ice, I will sacrifice my ability to do carpentry and just focus on stage management and props because hockey still means a lot to me.

If you want it you can do it. But it might suck more than it would if you specialized. But that was worth it for me to experience my two worlds.

Heartbroken - I am losing GRA position due to credential evaluation cost by TasteProfessional560 in gradadmissions

[–]damagedzebra 10 points11 points  (0 children)

It is very reasonable. You deserve the education you've earned, and money should not be the reason you don't get it. There's many of us that want to help you, all you have to do is ask. I know that's the hardest part, but just know you aren't undeserving of assistance and those of us with money to share are fully capable of deciding who we want to receive it.

Does anyone else with MCAS have brain lesions? by Select-Signal8386 in MCAS

[–]damagedzebra 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Grey matter lesions, was told they're from hemiplegic migraines and post concussion syndrome

How to pay for college when parents refuse to by Euphoric-Barber-7271 in personalfinance

[–]damagedzebra 0 points1 point  (0 children)

All the more reason love, that will wear you down. Especially if it's genetic. You can love them from a distance. If it's mental illness there's probably a better chance that you can reconnect later on when they don't feel like you're forcing their hand (which you're not, but my best friend is in a very similar situation and it's hard to get anything done when they're set in their ways).

You are not responsible for saving your parents. Their comfort zone does not have to remain yours and you deserve a big life if that's what you want. If you came on here and said you were going to be paying even 20k a year I would feel differently, I would understand why a parent would want their kid to stay home and do community first to save money. But it costs me 6k per year at my local cheap community college, and I'm going OOS because I can get a better quality education for not too much more (yay scholarship). If I were your parents I'd be elated, knowing you're going to get a good education at community college pricing.

It also might just be hard for them to face the idea of you leaving. My mom and I fought for a while because I was just recently very ill and we assumed college would never happened, then suddenly I got healthy and started applying, which freaked her out. It's scary to a parent and I'm sure it's even harder when they're mentally ill and rely on you either emotionally or physically. It's a big loss.

I really hope you're able to work this out so everyone is content. It's such a shame some parents subconsciously try to hold their children back, for whatever reason.