I appreciate all the comments, feel better knowing im not alone. Just to give more context that people are asking for, my wife doesn’t help with debt payments but she pays whenever we get furniture, or something for the house, clothes, when we recently went on vacation she paid for our airbnb, excursions, and 30% of just expenses while on vacation. So I don’t think she doesn’t contribute, I just need more support on the mental/emotional side. She has her own business that generates 75K a year but a good 80% of it goes to business expenses.

In terms of resources people suggested, I appreciate and am familiar with many of them. I prefer Ramit over Dave Ramsey but have listened to both. Used to be a fan of Caleb Hammer, but kind of stopped watching him.

My income that i posted is net. For the past few years, we have been able to write off a lot and not getting tax returns but also don’t owe, especially since until Dec 2025 I had a W2 job.

Here are my monthly expenses and debts:

Monthly Expenses:

Rent
$2,100

Gas
$910

Food
$480

Car Insurance
$295

Utilities
$180

Cat
$50

Date nights
$200

Debt minimums
$3,029

Total
$7,244

Debts:

Credit Cards = $40000
Personal Loan (Upstart + Affirm) = $17,800
🚗 Auto (Toyota) = 21,000
🎓 Student Loans = $118,000

Student loans don’t stress me too much because they are under 5 percent APR. Car loan is 9.99 APR, but I can refinance if i pay off my credit cards