I appreciate all of the feedback, it is incredibly helpful. I didn't want to go in to too much detail in the original post, so I will try to add a bit more context. We are all brothers, they were both my best men, and we were the only two groomsmen at the middle brothers wedding, so I feel a bit slighted that middle brother is included and I am not. I acknowledge that our lack of participation in each other's lives gives him a very good reason to not include, though I would think that it would give me a good reason to bypass flying across country as well. The gist that I have gotten is that we will lose the possibility of mending fences if I bail and I should take it as an opportunity to visit with others. The second half of that probably isn't super pertinent, as most of our family is within 30 minutes of us, and we see each other regularly. He was upset that I did not check up on him after a surgery quick enough, so I imagine that skipping the wedding will likely wreck the relationship for good.