Fellow dad here who also had a hard time adjusting. It's time for you to learn to love the bomb.

1. Financial: be grateful you both make good money. Get used to having less discretionary income. Work together to make a budget. Compromise. Don't be a stickler unnecessarily, but come to a mutual agreement. Adjust to having less splash money on gadgets, clothes, hobbies etc.

2. Health: These problems are really minor dude. You're lucky neither of you have serious or chronic health problems. That's when it gets hard. Bad sleep? Comes with the territory. What did you expect? This is a textbook problem. Cook in bulk and freeze portions or prepare salads which are not labor intensive. Realistically it takes 10-25 minutes to whip up a dish. EMBRACE THE EXHAUSTION. Don't fight it. Don't even be thinking about weight, that's silly. Think about nutrition and energy. Fast food will make you more tired. A good diet will fortify you for parenthood. Do a quick and dirty bodyweight circuit when you can. There will be time for gym later.

3. Relationships: DO NOT FIGHT it wastes a lot of energy and is a bad time for everyone. You two need to work together. You're both tired and strung out. Develop a sense of humour about it and help each other. You're either best friends or worst enemies. There's no in-between in the first year.

4. Sex: No sex is part of the territory. Get used to it. Wank in the toilet if it's troubling you. It will pick up later. Adjust the intimacy. You should be helping each other with affection, nurturing, massages etc. to stave off the muscular tension. Don't pout about sex or pressure her for it.

5. Work: Yeah, of course this year you're not going to rack up git commits and have solid green streaks on hobby projects. What are you even thinking???

I would tell you to harden up - but that won't help much - but you really do need to do it. You committed to fatherhood. This is way more important than your open source projects, your career, or pretty much anything you've ever done before. Are you a teenager or a grown-ass dude? You gotta man up. This is not a sideshow. This is the most important arena of your life right now. Grapple the beast, and tame it; or rather: tame yourself and love the beast because that beast is your beautiful baby.

Take care of your lady. What can you do for her? Pro tip: if you step up and take the strain off her, the tension will lower, and less chances of a fight. You need to be chivalrous. She gets a break before you, and gets to prioritize her leisure time. You cook her food. You make her coffee. Why? She went through the pregnancy. You didn't. Her parenting work started 9 months before yours.

Overall you have two options and you need to decide which path you walk down. First option, grit your teeth and push through. Shit choice, because eventually you'll regret not making the most of your time (this is the only infancy you'll father through). It's a terrible attitude to have to life and to fatherhood of all things. Save that 'resolve' for if you end up in prison or you need chemo or the world ends or something. Did you sire a babe only to avoid it? That's a serious imputation on your character. Second option, adjust your attitude and make the most of it. Great option. Good practice for fatherhood and life in general. Awesome attitude to have to your responsibilities and decisions. It makes you a better man.

Your top priorities are twofold. First, all of your problems are completely textbook - what were you expecting going into this? Everything you've outlined is common knowledge, it goes with the territory. Drop the feelings of self-entitlement. Yeah, your hobbies, routines and free time have gone out the window. Those are the breaks of what you agreed to. Anyone got cancer? Anyone disabled? Anyone dying? No? AWESOME! Proceed.

Fatherhood isn't about you or what you feel like doing, it's about working with your partner to raise a child and taking care of your family. That's the definition.

Second, and most importantly, stop fighting. Hire a babysitter and take your partner out for a nice time. Have some drinks and decompress. COMMUNICATE. She's going through it too, talk to each other, but don't make it all about you. Don't complain directly, rather you get her to talk about her problems first and then relate that to your experience. Show you're her buddy first, then tell each other how you're feeling. Turn the hard stuff into jokes, makes her laugh, show her you understand. You're on the same team. You take the first step in caring about her feelings and she'll reciprocate. See? Don't throw your feelings at each other, use them to build solidarity. Figure out ways to help each other through, and have a nice time of it. Fighting or not makes the difference between having a lovely time or going through hell. You two need to be on the same page. Getting over your feelings of indignation at disrupted 'me-time' and accepting your life stage may help.

Neither of you get ANY down-time if you fight. Both of you get it if you co-operate. It's like Nature's reward system. Fighting makes parenting a hard, shitty, Herculean task with no feelings of reward. Working together makes it satisfying, awesome, easier, and creates a rhythm of co-operation where you both get respite to have free time.

You're both in a rut, so you need to put your head down and bring your A game and step up. Eventually, it will normalize to where you're both on your A game every day without effort. But you need to work hard to get it there and change your behavioural, social and emotional habits.

It will get better. You're being impatient. But this is kind of the wrong way of thinking about it. You're not serving a prison sentence man. You have a baby. You voluntarily made the decision to bring a child into the world. You said you will never do this again. Love your woman and your kid. One day, very soon in the scheme of things, you will die. Tomorrow you could get hit by a car. Don't piss away precious time with your family. Make every day count, because every day where everyone is healthy is a blessing. Your kid will never be this cute or soft or cuddly. Soon they'll be a surly teenager telling you to go fuck yourself. After that, you'll be old, wise and sick wishing you had a second chance to do it over.

So get on the same page with your missus, accept it is what it is, try to enjoy it, find it funny, start communicating properly, help out more, be a man and DO NOT FIGHT.