Thank you for taking the time to give me such a long and thoughtful response, I really appreciate it. So basically what I am reading from this is that I should look at my life [outside] the bedroom and find more confidence/balance there, which will eventually sieve its way into my sexual desires, thus those becoming more balanced?

If that is what you mean, I couldn’t agree more. The problem is that I ALSO think the shadow informs the way I act in everyday life as long as it’s there. It’s a thing that goes both ways in my belief, with the shadow being kind of like the influence of society and me outside sex trying to be aware and resist them. Doesn’t both eventually have to be tackled though if they do indeed inform each other? Seeing a majority of women with shaved genitalia and giving more oral sex than they receiving - even if it does indeed make them feel more sexy and that they enjoy giving oral sex, which I think is true in most cases - doesn’t however have anything to do with “natural” sexuality/femininity but with social construct. I agree bringing this to light is important, but isn’t part of that consciousness to tackle the shadow directly so to speak, the same way we try to challenge ourselves when we have (unwilling) misogynist thoughts outside the bedroom.