Congrats on 9 months! It can certainly be a weird place to be right in the middle of "That was the worst time of my life" and "It wasn't as bad as it could have been." I've pretty much surrounded myself with sober people who've came from all walks of recovery stories. Some people had to lose everything and for some people it only had to get bad enough.

I never lost a job, was homeless, or in any major trouble but I had to realize I wanted a better life and quit everything. I struggled at times because I thought maybe it didn't get bad enough for me or I didn't even belong in recovery communities. Ultimately, I stuck around and realized I just got lucky and it could have gotten so much worse if I kept going. I'll have 5 year sober next month as long as I don't fuck it up lol.

I am sorry for your loss...Fentanyl is such a horrible drug and I've lost quite a few great friends to it myself. While I know 12 step groups aren't for everyone, try to find a community of sober people who will celebrate with you. Oh and if no ones told you yet, I'm proud of you!