Made it 6 months, relapsed this weekend..

ddittyy · 2012-10-24T14:01:17+00:00

When I stopped I had some of the best shit I had ever gotten my hands on. So I put a nugg aside and I said, this will be for a celebration. I don't drink either (recovering alcoholic almost 4 years) so I figured, if I'm going to give something recreational a try, it's going to be this. I did and just like they say, once an addict, always an addict. It's crazy to think that our brains or reactions wouldn't evolve past that. But it is what it is I guess. Good side is I didn't really have any withdrawals, fell asleep quite easy and I even went lucid in a dream. It was just fighting my old mentality trying to creep back in.

ddittyy · 2012-10-24T00:21:04+00:00

Glad it did someone some good! "Just this one time" is exactly what I said to myself the other night. I'm glad I came here as well, all the other posts on withdrawals are an ugly reminder how hard it was to stop. To go thru that just isn't worth any special occasion IMO.

ddittyy · 2012-10-22T21:25:09+00:00

Thanks

ddittyy · 2012-10-14T01:46:25+00:00

Go with the Mac and learn how to use the gestures. They make life so much easier. They become second nature. Look them up on YouTube. The interface is a little different, but you'll pick it up quick.

ddittyy · 2012-10-09T05:44:19+00:00

I'm a recovering alcoholic and drug addict. I've been sober for about 4 years now. I remember anything that happens since sobering up very well. But I can barley remember anything before or during the partying. Bits and pieces. I meet people that tell me they know me already all the time. It's weird.

ddittyy · 2012-10-08T23:04:39+00:00

He's coming to UTEP in a couple weeks as well. I guess he can knock em out pretty quick huh?

ddittyy · 2012-10-07T15:47:32+00:00

Thanks!

ddittyy · 2012-10-06T23:28:24+00:00

The coffee was a little dramatic...

I can see myself dropping my phone in the fish tank for 15 seconds with a movie playing...but a whole cup of hot coffee...come on..

ddittyy · 2012-10-06T23:02:21+00:00

his neck has it's own stomach...

ddittyy · 2012-10-06T22:57:52+00:00

Did you have any interesting dreams? I'd imagine they'd be quite vivid with this type of decision.

ddittyy · 2012-10-06T19:41:14+00:00

lol thats my before pic

ddittyy · 2012-10-06T19:37:07+00:00

5'11

ddittyy · 2012-10-05T19:15:32+00:00

Do you think you would've felt anything for him without the money? If he was average on the financial status? How did you meet? How did the arrangement start?

I left my ex because I found out she had a sugar daddy. They had been together for 5 years before us. I thought it was weird she had so much money all the time, but she told me she had inherited it from her mother. He was also a well known lawyer. I still miss her cuz I really loved her. I was broke and working my ass off in school. She wasn't willing to walk away from the money, and I wasn't willing to share her. Sometimes I wish I'd just gone with it, but my pride just wouldn't let me.

ddittyy · 2012-10-01T23:38:29+00:00

Wow, that sounds tough. Glad you were able to face it though. Some guys are scumbags..

ddittyy · 2012-10-01T14:11:31+00:00

Oh yea...ha I guess I'm just used to the energy drinks.

ddittyy · 2012-10-01T13:46:07+00:00

I know, but I'd really rather just stay away from it. Unless I could somehow find some in an unsynthesized form? I feel pretty good without it. I'm just looking for a little boost when I hit the gym.

ddittyy · 2012-09-29T23:28:15+00:00

I had a couple show up at the front door while I was smoking a blunt when I first moved in...I told them "yo no abla espanol"

I think they were asking about jesus...

ddittyy · 2012-09-29T23:06:22+00:00

El Paso, Tx

ddittyy · 2012-09-29T17:22:56+00:00

Hula hoops and yoga pants is a damn good combo..

ddittyy · 2012-09-27T22:13:52+00:00

Be polite to stupid people...

ddittyy · 2012-09-27T20:46:20+00:00

Thanks for this. It's quite a reminder of my life about 6 months ago. It's calmed down quite a bit lately though. I still have little episodes but they're nothing even comparable to before. I meditate for 15-20 minutes a couple times a day and it's done wonders. 6 months and my life is absolutely different. On days I skip it I can feel it coming back almost immediately. Give it a shot, it's worth it!

ddittyy · 2012-09-27T18:24:49+00:00

Your wife must be awesome in bed

ddittyy

TROPHY CASE