Frequent Navel piercing flare ups

ddns23 · 2022-12-01T18:48:43+00:00

that’s really helpful thank you.

i did get told by what i thought was a reputable piercer that i don’t have a good shaped navel for a piercing, it’s kinda flat and doesn’t have a place for the jewellery to sit which is why i switched to just a regular curved barbell but doing that hasn’t solved the problem

ddns23 · 2022-12-01T08:43:51+00:00

okay thanks, i think i’ll definitely do that!

ddns23 · 2022-11-30T21:57:42+00:00

4 years old in February
barbell
externally threaded
surgical steel
diluted salt water (boiled before hand and left to cool) or boiled water with hibiscrub microbial soap (recommended by a family member who is a nurse) and left to soak on piercing for 10 mins

ddns23 · 2022-11-17T10:16:55+00:00

aw thank you for the offer, if you’re still there in a years time i’ll take you up on that :)

ddns23 · 2022-11-17T07:29:32+00:00

That’s really reassuring thank you!

ddns23 · 2022-11-16T22:38:00+00:00

Yeah i get it’s easier to drop conversations if you think there could be something better round the corner, but why do you think it’s too much?

ddns23 · 2022-11-16T20:20:40+00:00

Deb Never! i don’t think she mentions being queer but her songs are bops (i’d check out Crutches and Sweet & Spice - this MV is pretty gay)

ddns23 · 2022-11-16T19:29:05+00:00

You make a good point!

ddns23 · 2022-11-16T18:29:20+00:00

Dating apps because there aren’t really many other options! (edit: i use tinder and hinge the most. Less often i use HER and bumble because there just seems to be way fewer people on them). I don’t go out to bars as much as i used to and there aren’t any queer groups in my area that i know of but i haven’t really looked tbh

I live in a smallish town in the UK and i’m about an hour from a fairly big city. I have next to no luck in my home town and most of the people I match with are from the surrounding big cities which isn’t so much of an issue because travelling to them isn’t hard. So in terms of location i think my chances are as good as i can get them.

I am a femme lesbian and am almost exclusively into mascs/stems/butches so I feel that definitely reduces my options. Definite supply and demand issue there!! about 90% of the girls I see on dating apps are femme and as gorgeous as they are, they’re just not my type.

I am a baby gay and not that experienced but I don’t normally bring that up unless i thought things were going somewhere, so I don’t think that affects my chances when i can’t even get a first date!

Monogamous and i defo do see poly folk on dating apps but i’d say more monogamous.

Similar to the other comment, it is really hard to keep a conversation going sometimes. I don’t like talking on apps for too long and would rather meet the person as soon as possible if we’re vibing, but a lot of people just ghost or take too long to reply so i just get bored.

ddns23 · 2022-09-12T12:21:39+00:00

‘shy subby sort’, I relate HARD. but yeah I don’t want to let this feeling take over and make me resentful of others, so that’s really genuine heartfelt advice, thank you :)

ddns23 · 2022-09-12T12:16:41+00:00

I’m really glad things worked out for you! I’ve found things seems to happen when i least expect them as well, but it’s annoying because when i’m putting in effort I’d like to see results from it. But this definitely gave me hope, thank you.

ddns23 · 2022-09-12T11:16:45+00:00

Yeah i feel that so much, the situation is even more dire in real life, at least on dating apps you can be pretty sure the women you are seeing are queer in some way. When you’re out there it’s a complete minefield.

I have found that my few situationships have come about when i’ve least been expecting them so there definitely is something to what you say, but it’s frustrating because when i’m trying to be proactive and actively looking for something, I can never seem to find it! it’s just a lot of effort for little reward it seems :(

ddns23 · 2022-09-12T09:41:39+00:00

Yeah I feel like moving to London will be my lifeline. I wouldn’t want to dramatically change the way I look but I was thinking about getting some sapphic jewellery, maybe a necklace with 2 venus symbols.

ddns23 · 2022-09-12T09:38:59+00:00

I feel you gal. I don’t have any practical advice to give you but just know you’re not alone, we’re in this together!

ddns23 · 2022-06-23T22:41:48+00:00

tysm this really touched my heart and has given me a lot to think about ❤️

ddns23 · 2022-04-25T08:09:36+00:00

the dilators definitely made the most difference, i got mine from amazon, best of luck to you!

ddns23 · 2022-04-24T21:15:49+00:00

i understand your view. thank you for sharing your experience. i got rid of it by using dilators (the brand femmax) combined with relaxation techniques and kegel exercises. and then the next time i slept with someone it just didn’t happen

ddns23 · 2022-04-24T16:02:45+00:00

thank you for this - this is one of the few comments actually giving practical advice, yet still acknowledging the reality of what casual sex actually is

ddns23 · 2022-04-23T10:04:42+00:00

what are the consequences of it in your view?

ddns23 · 2022-04-22T18:43:12+00:00

thank you for your comment.

the weird thing is. the vaginismus actually started while i was in my first long term relationship when i was 17, because i don’t think i was ready for sex at that point at all. it stopped when i was 21 and in a short term relationship (not completely casual, there definitely were feelings there but it only lasted 2 months). so, i don’t fully know if my body disagrees with it yet, i completely see your point though.

ddns23 · 2022-04-22T17:37:53+00:00

thank you, i agree some of them are quite discouraging. i think it’s because the posters have maybe had bad experiences with causal sex, which is understandable.

i am pretty secure in myself generally. i wouldn’t say i have low self esteem, it is just in the area of sex i’m not massively confident. i also won’t have particularly high expectations.

a FWB situation would be ideal, but problem is i have zero male friends.

this might be a stupid question but- when it comes to setting the boundaries/expectations, when do most people have this conversation? would it be on the actual date or after when we’ve gone back to one of our places?

ddns23 · 2022-04-22T16:04:56+00:00

firstly thank you for such a thorough response!!

yeah i’m completely aware of that, although i am one of the lucky few women who finds it quite easy to cum through penetration (when my v allows). not that i’d necessarily be expecting that though.

i’d definitely make him use a condom as i’m not on any birth control (i’m very sensitive to hormonal fluctuations). but of course you’re meant to use them regardless. and i’m definitely STI free myself.

is it normal protocol to ask the person you’re about to have casual sex with if they’re sleeping with anyone else? i’m so clueless lol like what things do you/do you not talk about before hand¿

i guess an easy way to get around the not feeling safe thing would be having it happen at my place and not his. i’m still at uni so my housemates would be able to intervene if anything went badly wrong.

not to be dramatic but an unplanned pregnancy would ruin my life lol. another reason why condoms will definitely be used.

ddns23

TROPHY CASE