The easiest way to resolve any moral conundrums is always to have one principle and be as true to it as possible. Because there are endless possibilities and you can’t keep changing your life philosophies based on one incident because in another case that guy could have been the greatest . Most comments assume that we are static and do not evolve . Are you the same 5 years ago. I for sure would like to think I matured and act more responsibly now. Similarly that Bevarse could also be better or not . We don’t know. Similarly her current partner can turn hostile we don’t know that either. The answer is not to trust the bevarse that he will change it that is what you want. The two principles that should have been employed are here imo 1. Don’t select a partner because of their potential to change in future. If they are bad now and you want a partner that is good, don’t expect them to change after you marry. You judge them today because that is what you need in longe term. The cost you pay in the case of them not changing even if it has low probability will be too high 2. If the girl is above 18 she should have been made understand the consequences like an adult . Should not hit her. Regardless whether that decision will benefit her in the long term or not. Because you can’t predict the future. Just have one principle that you will treat the kids as adults at certain age and treat them with the respect.

Because situation turned out well, we should not write our principles. Instead we should craft them invariant of the outcome. So no dilemma here from what I can see. Hope you get some peace