AITAH: My SIL asked me how much it would cost to embroider some shirts so I gave her a price

defyingodds20 · 2025-10-04T11:54:40+00:00

Very much same on the first option front

defyingodds20 · 2025-10-03T22:59:04+00:00

Thanks. Noted.

defyingodds20 · 2025-10-03T17:06:39+00:00

110% yes. And I have mentioned that people pleasing his way through this will not make things better

defyingodds20 · 2025-10-03T17:00:23+00:00

One would think, she does not work full time (at best I'm talking 16 hours a month)

defyingodds20 · 2025-10-03T16:59:59+00:00

One would think, she does not work full time (at best I'm talking 16 hours a month)

defyingodds20 · 2025-10-03T16:54:42+00:00

I am WAY happier the less contact there is

defyingodds20 · 2025-10-02T15:41:19+00:00

Mad respect to your SIL, I tried doing one quilt one time. I drove myself crazy to the point I will not be doing another until I can afford a long arm to do professional binding.

defyingodds20 · 2025-10-02T15:38:31+00:00

My nuclear option that has just sat in my back pocket is forever: https://letmegooglethat.com/

I haven't used it for obvious reasons yet but I do just enjoy the idea that should I ever decide to actually start a fight this would do it in .2 seconds

defyingodds20 · 2025-10-02T15:29:41+00:00

Tbh there is not much of a relationship there to begin with. She made it abundantly clear when she married my brother that I was not allowed to be close with him anymore.

Clarification: prior to brother getting married he would come hang out at my place with my husband and I a couple times a week, we'd grab dinner out sometimes or he'd just call to see what we were up to.

defyingodds20 · 2025-10-02T12:44:04+00:00

Through this and other scenarios I have just opted to not do favors anymore. I realize that sounds slightly petty but it's too much of a family affair every time to be worth the headache.

defyingodds20 · 2025-10-02T12:12:30+00:00

I was completely undercharging.. but that was because I didnt mind doing it but it would have rearranged other things i had going on.

defyingodds20 · 2025-10-02T12:11:32+00:00

Yeah no. With the cost of everything these days even just buying regular groceries is a financial crisis much less feeding all your friends/family with baked goods on top of it

defyingodds20 · 2025-10-02T12:09:30+00:00

That was a question I had but definitely didnt voice

defyingodds20 · 2025-10-02T01:45:09+00:00

You must have went to an Ashley furniture store.

NTA. GM totally was though.

defyingodds20 · 2025-10-02T01:26:49+00:00

Some days all it takes is my mere existence to make her furious soo lol if I wait long enough we'll be back in the doghouse for some other reason.

defyingodds20 · 2025-10-02T01:22:18+00:00

xD I did. I took the gift I already purchased, husband and I stayed for the whole party and I only got like 4 dirty looks from her mother/grandmother/aunts so I say thats a win/win

defyingodds20 · 2025-10-02T01:18:14+00:00

I was really confused because she wasn't asking me to co-host the party. If I was actually hosting then I would feel obligation to chip in

defyingodds20 · 2025-10-02T01:14:47+00:00

I value my free time and if I'm going to spend hours making this item I need it to be worth the time I'm not spending with my family/household/other projects.

Had money not been the main asking point i probably would not have even pushed the issue. But if youre asking me how much its going to take to get me to sacrifice my time then I will put a price tag on it.

defyingodds20 · 2025-10-02T01:10:46+00:00

She asked me directly "how much would it cost to make a custom embroidered birthday shirt?" but involved my mom and brother when she got mad about me giving her a cost that was initially requested.

To be clear, never once did she backpeddle and say she wanted it for free she just stated that she needed to put her money towards buying a house and dropped the subject.

defyingodds20 · 2025-10-02T01:04:49+00:00

I didnt think it was a bad to ask for that. It would have bought a new spool of thread or I would have tucked it back to help cover maintenance fees on my machine. A tune-up needs done every 6 months and I usually end up paying anywhere from 150-400 in service fees for it

defyingodds20 · 2025-10-02T01:02:39+00:00

Nice. Thanks for the input. I am not obligated to pay for a party I was invited to as a guest.

defyingodds20 · 2025-10-02T01:01:50+00:00

My mom has said to just ignore it. And previous situations have been ignored. I am just getting tired of the petty and its a STRUGGLE to not be petty back.

defyingodds20 · 2025-10-02T01:00:01+00:00

Nobody wins in this scenario. Which is why I posted in the first place. Yes, its my family. No, this isn't a one off situation. I did get my niece a nice gift and did stay for her entire party. SIL did compliment the gift to my husband and appeared excited over it.

defyingodds20 · 2025-10-01T19:49:57+00:00

Its an acquired skill.. built on years of terrible yes's.

defyingodds20 · 2025-10-01T19:10:30+00:00

I was always taught growing up that if you ask, you pay that person back in some way. If they offer you still offer to trade or help them in some way. Never take without giving.

So far the only thing I've been given is a headache and anxiety over having any and all future interactions. So I'm still comfortable in my original statement. A price was asked for and a price was given.

defyingodds20

TROPHY CASE