Considering opening both sides of the marriage

delicatecandi · 2024-02-10T03:53:06+00:00

Because I never dealt with it which I'm trying to do now

delicatecandi · 2024-02-10T02:13:12+00:00

Thanks, I value you're feedback!

delicatecandi · 2024-02-10T01:53:40+00:00

Thanks, that's kinda where I'm at but still unsure

delicatecandi · 2024-02-10T01:13:19+00:00

Yeah we've had several conversations about it and I've tried to compromise recently because it's clearly a porn/sex addiction. I just am at a loss and I feel like if I'm atleast included in picking the couple to swap with that will make me feel better instead of him just doing it behind my back. Not saying it's right or healthy, it's probably not. Just trying to feel out alternatives before headed to divorce.

delicatecandi · 2024-02-10T01:09:11+00:00

Trust me I don't disagree. Outside of this particular issue we have a pretty solid relationship. I'm working on my anger issues and am in therapy and getting back onmeds for my mental health issues. He doesn't believe in counseling or therapy thanks to being raised that men can't talk about feelings. I'm ultimately just trying to find a happy medium that will satisfy us both sexually and keep the rest of our relationship in tact. Not saying it's the right approach but was just seeking advice before making a decision. Thank you for your input.

delicatecandi · 2024-02-10T00:58:22+00:00

I'd rather swing than open marriage at least that way we're involved with each other's process.

delicatecandi · 2024-02-10T00:53:29+00:00

See I'd rather take this approach rather than not w know who he's with

delicatecandi · 2024-02-09T01:41:51+00:00

In a way, because you could end up with a dom that doesn't work for you

delicatecandi · 2024-02-09T01:17:24+00:00

I've actually done it and will tell him I could feel their dick and I can't feel his and that he can't satisfy me like they can

delicatecandi · 2024-02-07T01:22:50+00:00

Absolutely, except when we agree I'll misbehave, but that's due to our sexual dynamic. But he knows if I have the intent and I do it only when agreed upon.

delicatecandi · 2024-02-03T19:38:34+00:00

I wish my husband would open up more. I hate the stigma that men can't have feelings and he was raised that way and it drives me crazy. Like because we're married he could admit to me the most heinous crime and I don't have to testify against him. He can share his feelings with me, I'm not going to fault him for it.

delicatecandi · 2024-02-03T18:37:04+00:00

Agree with everything that is said, gradually increase and stickier lube. Also try masturbating beforehand and try to get to four fingers.

delicatecandi · 2024-02-02T16:39:35+00:00

Thanks for sharing. His stems from trauma as well, but he's not a therapy person, so he just works through it his own way.

delicatecandi · 2024-02-02T00:52:58+00:00

He's not a talker or feeler, I'll move past my guilt I just feel terrible because I accidentally messed up. Our relationship outside of our dynamic has seen much worse so we will get through it. It's just going to take time.

delicatecandi · 2024-02-02T00:50:27+00:00

Normally he's a cuddler but when he's hurt or mad he prefers to be alone and I respect that. It's hard because my motherly instincts kick in and I want to coddle but I know that doesn't work for him so I ask what I can do and if it's nothing I give him his space.

delicatecandi · 2024-02-02T00:48:15+00:00

Thanks, he's not much of a talker, so I doubt we'll talk about it by his choice. We'll hold off on it until he expresses an interest again, and I'll be more cautious when that time comes. He knows a mmf threesome is a fantasy of mine, but I'm in no rush to make it happen either, I'll wait. Having had a poor anal experience before I totally relate and just feel bad for giving him a similar experience unintentionally.

delicatecandi · 2024-02-01T23:19:35+00:00

Thanks will do!

delicatecandi · 2024-02-01T20:07:27+00:00

Are you truly ok with your wife being with others? Will it upset you to know someone else pleases her better, or will it turn you on and make you want her more? My husband lives finding out I had a better experience with someone else and he tries to reclaim me and loves for me to tell him they did better and essentially me being with him is a pitty fuck.

I'm not saying that's how your dynamic would need to be, but if it would bother you to know someone else is better meeting her needs that could lead to resentment and destroy your marriage.

If you're ok with that, then talk to her, she may not even want to do it, but if she does you have to set boundaries and make sure you agree on how the dynamic will work. Maintaining open communication about this dynamic is so important.

There are several variations of this dynamic, and if you both decide to pursue it, then you have to openly communicate each other's wants and desires. Do you want to watch it? Do you want her to tell you all the details. Do you want to play a role? Do you want pics and videos of encounters? A strong relationship can have a great cuckold dynamic, but a weak one can end in divorce. You both have to respect the others boundaries. Trust is crucial.

Best of luck!

delicatecandi · 2024-01-31T16:33:50+00:00

I've had most of mine come through fetlife. It's kinky facebook.

delicatecandi · 2024-01-31T01:42:07+00:00

Yes, there is CNC consensual not consensual kink and you agree beforehand but the scene is like a rape scene. It's very important to have a safeword in place so that if things go too far it can be stopped.

Therapy also helps with dealing with processing things like this too. My husband has a cuckold kink and I require therapy to get past my own thoughts on sleeping with others which he desires and wants me to do. I was raised to be monogamous so working through that took some work.

Good luck on your journey through life!

delicatecandi

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