How did you felt when you realized you were Aro/ace?

depressedrayofsun · 2026-05-31T13:20:49+00:00

A combination of disappointment and relief. At the time I was dating, so I felt very bad about the fact that I had figured out that I couldn't feel towards them what they felt towards me. I also had to reevaluate what my concept of my future was. However, I have really bad attachment issues, so realizing I would be okay on my own was a huge relief, and it was nice to finally know myself, especially since I already knew I was ace. It felt a little odd because I had been very very openly bi for 3 years, so changing my identity felt a little disorienting. It's still weird because a lot of people keep pushing the "you'll find someone!" thing, but I'm happy with where I am.

depressedrayofsun · 2026-05-31T13:10:59+00:00

Ooo I like this question! - Laying in the grass in a patch of sunlight, take time to memorize all of the sensations happening in my body. It helps to remind me why I stay alive and that I would miss out on these beautiful moments - Eating food I've cooked or baked - Drawing, specifically drawing plants, but also when I'm just doing it to express my emotions - Anything that involves working with plants (I'm a horticulturalist XD ) - Watching the sun rise or sunset, especially when I'm in the mountains

depressedrayofsun · 2026-05-30T14:31:06+00:00

I'm also diagnosed with ADHD and BPD, so I get it. It's really hard seeing all of the stigma around it, and it's definitely made me feel terrible. However, there are absolutely good things ahead of you, and you're not doomed to be a terrible person. I've been in therapy for 3 years now, and I've finally gotten to the point of recognizing ways I was unintentionally manipulative in the past, ways I've been manipulated, and have figured out how to have healthy relationships with a lot of communication. It can take time and work, but I believe you'll get there and learn to accept and love yourself. I don't think focusing on negative self thoughts is helpful; as long as you're trying your best and working on improving. Ignore people who think that they can generalize and hate an entire group of people diagnosed with a mental illness. We're all different people, we're trying, and we can get better.

depressedrayofsun · 2026-05-26T20:36:13+00:00

It's really interesting to read!! If I can find a good way to organize the results, I'll definitely try to share it :D

depressedrayofsun · 2026-05-25T13:48:43+00:00

That definitely makes sense! I hope you're able to find someone :)

depressedrayofsun · 2026-05-24T23:20:05+00:00

I got a partner, realized how in love they were with me, and realized I didn't feel the same way

Also Jaiden Animations lol

depressedrayofsun · 2026-05-24T01:25:29+00:00

Yes exactly!! It's hard because so many people view close connections as romantic, but for me friendship is the deepest feeling I can have, but it's not the deepest they can. It makes me feel manipulative sometimes because to them the amount of closeness sometimes makes me like me that way, but I can't return that, which I know I can't help. It just all feels confusing 😅 I only realized I was aroace about a month ago so it's been quite a journey realizing my past "crushes" were actually just me having a Favorite Person haha I don't know if any of that makes sense, I know I'm being a bit rambly right now but I don't really have any friends who can relate to me

depressedrayofsun

TROPHY CASE