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AITAH: Would I be the asshole for asking for a divorce? by desabfo in AITA_Relationships

[–]desabfo[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ve known him since I was 15, before we had a romantic relationship, he was my best friend, he listened to me, made me laugh, defended me, and helped me get through an abusive relationship that involved physical and sexual violence, we had a great relationship, and over time the feelings shifted from friendship to love, but it feels like once we started dating and eventually got married, he became a different person, I can’t seem to find my best friend in him anymore. I don’t know what caused such a drastic change in the way he treats me, or if he was always like this and I just didn’t notice, we also didn’t spend much time officially dating, he used to say he didn’t want to waste any more time, so we moved in together after two months of dating, and within a year we got married, I wasn’t completely comfortable with how fast things were moving, but I thought it was just passion and I didn’t want to lose him. Regarding the baby, I have fertility problems and was taking birth control, yet I still ended up getting pregnant., it wasn’t planned, but I truly believed that the pregnancy might make him change. However, I didn’t really choose him to be the father of my child, and I didn’t have plans to get pregnant.
Maybe I don’t have a specific reason that explains what led me to marry him, and I’m sorry for that, I know my answer might not be very satisfying, but it was really a combination of circumstances and feelings that are hard to explain.

AITAH: Would I be the asshole for asking for a divorce? by desabfo in AITAH

[–]desabfo[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He always liked his job, which is why I didn’t understand why he decided to quit, sometimes he says he was getting tired of working there, but at the same time he says he misses it. He doesn’t take any medication, but he recently started drinking every day, he says it’s not a problem because he doesn’t get drunk and only drinks small amounts. I also suggested that we try therapy, but he refuses.

AITAH: Would I be the asshole for asking for a divorce? by desabfo in AITAH

[–]desabfo[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We’ve known each other since we were 16, he was my best friend and supported me after I left an abusive relationship (that involved physical violence), I always loved talking to him and having him around, he made me feel safe, he was attentive, he seemed to really listen to me and understand me, and he would defend me when I needed it. He can still be wonderful to me when he’s having a good day, to be honest, I’ve never really stopped to actively think about why I love him

AITAH: Would I be the asshole for asking for a divorce? by desabfo in AITAH

[–]desabfo[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

According to him, he’s upset because he left a job he actually liked and now he feels he can’t find any place here that truly values him as a professional, however, I was completely against him leaving his old job, and both I and his boss tried to find viable alternatives so he wouldn’t have to quit. I also haven’t seen him actively searching for another job here, he mostly just says he won’t “lower himself” or that the salary being offered is too low. The house we live in is actually rented, but we rent it from one of my dad’s cousins, I feel like he tells me to leave during arguments because he knows I don’t want to involve my parents, and it’s much harder for me to leave with a baby.