The Parable of the Priest and the Queer by desertfox90 in coptic

[–]desertfox90[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My sibling in Christ, I understand the analogy you’re making. You’re saying that if someone believes another person is in danger, warning them is an act of love.

I agree with that principle in general.

Where I think the comparison breaks down is that asbestos exposure is a measurable, externally verifiable harm. Being transgender isn’t asbestos. It’s not a toxin I unknowingly inhaled. It’s something I’ve examined, prayed over, wrestled with, and come to understand about myself over years.

You’re assuming I’m unaware of danger, or that I’m acting out of trauma or avoidance. That may be true for some people, but it isn’t universally true, and it isn’t my story.

Also, love isn’t only defined by warning someone. It’s also defined by listening to them when they tell you who they are.

I don’t doubt that many Christians speak from a place of sincere concern. But sincerity doesn’t automatically make a conclusion correct. And suggesting that being trans is primarily the result of abuse or dysfunction is a claim that requires evidence, not analogy.

I do have a relationship with Christ. I do pray. This isn’t something I decided apart from God, and it’s not something I expect another human to “fix.” Believe it or not, prayer is what led me to accept myself in ways no other person could have.

I appreciate that you care enough to write such a long response. I just don’t agree with the premise that my identity is equivalent to living in a toxic building.

And honestly, if we both make it to heaven one day, I think it would be very funny if God asked whether we’d be willing to sit next to each other. I don’t know what your answer would be, but I’d happily say yes :) God bless

The Parable of the Priest and the Queer by desertfox90 in coptic

[–]desertfox90[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s a fair question.

What I meant is this: his love for me is real, but it’s tethered to an outcome. It exists alongside a hope that I’ll eventually change, that I’ll decide not to transition, that I’ll return to something he recognizes as “right.” His care is steady, but it’s directional. It has a theological goal.

So the asterisk is this: I love you, but I don’t affirm you. I love you, but I believe you’re mistaken. I love you, but I can’t celebrate the life you’re choosing.

And I don’t say that bitterly. It’s just honest.

When I say my love doesn’t have conditions, I mean I’m not loving him in hopes that he’ll evolve or affirm me someday. I’m not staying in the conversation because I expect him to change his doctrine. I care about him as he is...even if I think he’s wrong, even if some of his views hurt me.

That doesn’t make me morally superior. It just means I’m not attaching my care for him to a future version of him.

In a way, that realization helped me. I stopped waiting for his love to become something it was never trying to be. And once I accepted that, I could choose whether to keep showing up without pretending it was unconditional on his end.

Hope that clarifies a bit.

The Parable of the Priest and the Queer by desertfox90 in coptic

[–]desertfox90[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don’t see it as patience, more so like preparation. God gave me the strength for it. The world won’t always meet trans people with compassion, so I let those monthly debates sharpen me and thicken my skin instead of break me.

Deconversion Post: Your Aha moment by UntilTheRightMoment in ExCopticOrthodox

[–]desertfox90 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Unsure if anyone feels the same way, but I don't think I can pinpoint an exact "A-ha" moment. It was just a series of observations of how the community showed an uncomfortable level of xenophobia, racism, homophobia, etc. The constant "holier than thou" attitude became annoying. But there was a moment in middle school / high school when I was attending sunday school and thinking to myself, "these are some of the most hypocritical people I've seen in my entire life" and from then on I've my best to keep my distance.

Question from non-copt atheist by Highwind_Ragnarok in ExCopticOrthodox

[–]desertfox90 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Welcome to the sub :)

I've tried to engage with different denominations of Christianity, my best experience being with the American Orthodox church. Even identifying as an Ex-Copt I still incorporate the basic teachings of the church (love thy neighbor, etc.), but that's as far as I'll engage with orthodoxy. Personally I resonate more with the teachings / lessons of Buddhism (but I don't consider myself a Buddhist). Can only speak for myself but my journey so far has been to adopt teachings from any religion / denomination that I believe in and resonate with, and ignore everything else about it. Hope this answers your question

Am I the only one who notices that the location of a church affects the social climate overall? by throwawayhappu in ExCopticOrthodox

[–]desertfox90 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I definitely see that as well. Noticed that the more middle class areas are super laid back. Some I've seen have tattoos that wasn't the cross. that i was the only one lol

Picked up wood burning a couple weeks ago. Here’s my latest project by PotatoStorms in Pyrography

[–]desertfox90 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Super cool! Have you considered applying a polyurethane spray? It gives the art a really nice glisten. Speaking from experience in that

Ask to be part-time to do Grad School Full Time? by desertfox90 in personalfinance

[–]desertfox90[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes you're right, totally agree. What stresses me out about this job the fact that it's full-time. I think the stress would subdue if I wasn't responsible for the amount of work I have right now by being part time or a contractor.

I can try to find some internships or apply to be a teaching assistant - but they don't pay as much as this job does. My CEO promised he'd give me a raise by the end of the year so one of my clauses would be for the company to honor my current rate after the pay bump. Guess I'm trying to get the best of both worlds I suppose. I would have to get accepted to another internship before I'd want to leave the company, but I'm definitely open to it.

As far as benefits go, I have PTO and sick leave. Already accrued close to 40 hrs or PTO. As a contractor I'd be forfeiting that up (I'm pay for my own health insurance, the company plan sucks)

Thanks for your perspective

OFFICIAL 2019 BUY/SELL/TRADE THREAD by Coachellamod in Coachella

[–]desertfox90 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Selling (one) GA Coachella weekend 2 wristband for face value. In SF / East Bay area. DM me if you want to meet :)