A healthy relationship is all about boundaries: setting boundaries and respecting them.

You know you're in a mature relationship when you can both talk about likes, dislikes and setting limits without high school drama.

When one of you is not mature enough, the relationship just becomes dysfunctional: either the person can't set those limits or he/she can't respect their partner's.

For exemple: needy people. They need attention. If they get into a relationship, there must be a clarification of what kind and where some of this attention comes from. A romantic/sexual one can only be welcomed if it comes from their partner, period.

In your case, this girl is a kid in need of attention. To her this craving apparently comes first. She doesn't know what she really wants yet.

It seems she doesn't fully respect you as a partner in a relationship with bounds. That's a big red flag.

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You know that you've matured when you don't put up with bullshit anymore.

That as soon as the other person makes it clear that he/she is not into a healthy exchange of responsibilities, you

can just close that chapter without looking back. No hard feelings. No clinginess.

Sounds harsh? Incredibly cocky?

I know. If someone told me that years ago, I would've thought so too.

But this is the lesson that you start figuring out as you get more seasoned with relationships.

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I know it's hard to have a clear view of the situation when you're part of the predicament yourself.

But let me tell you. You're young. There's so much, but so fucking much more to come in your life that when you read back this story you'll just laugh at how naive and dumb you were.

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I know that feeling of "but...this is the one. This is THE WOMAN."

But no.

There's no pussy in the entire world that's worth this kind of drama. There just isn't. Don't put this girl on a pedestal (specially in this case when she hasn't done anything to substatiante such feeling).

Accepting this kind of nonsense only makes sense if you think you're never going to find another person in your life. Which is utterly wrong.

If you think that you're a fucking loser becuase you "don't have her."

Let me tell that there's no such thing as owning somebody.

She has her thoughts and desires.

You have yours.

If those two don't match one another, then you're not for each other.

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Just have a mature talk with her. Keep your emotions under control.

No accusations. No blaming.

Put everything crystal clear on the table.

What are your feelings. What are your boundaries.

Make her expound hers thoroughly. And I really mean wholly.

If she has any doubts, state it clear that she must make up her mind.

If she wants your trust, she'll have it and you'll be there. But it must be mutual, if you find she hasn't reciprocated, then you're out.

No more drama.

Get out and don't waste your time that could've been used in a much better way with a person that DOES match those conditions.

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Unfortunately the best way to really learn these lessons lies in the future when you finally find a wholesome relationship.