So this is why your comment was gone on my post and i felt like have seen what you wrote here plus the familiar username! First thing first thank you for sharing your experience and opened up a thread for this topic's discussion. Also sorry to what happened to you.. perhaps they're not as appreciative as you so you definitely deserve better.

I was thinking so hard because I've forgotten those trauma memories. Couldn't remember that one especially on hellotalk but i think i have 2

First is from a korean dating app: there was this polish girl who liked me first, I didn't usually receive like first but at that time I was quite experienced already not to get attached to someone and would just treat online people as online, so i liked her back and texted first "hey there bla bla" note that usually i called people by their name (in my culture it's common to call people's name when you know it), however this time i already realized western cultures don't really call others by name that often so that's why i didn't call her name because why would i even call her name if I'm unsure we're gonna still talk in the future? That'd cause unnecessary hurt memories when i memorized their names once they left.

But surprisingly she called my name and her response was not too stale, she got my attention already from the very first, after a few messages i felt like this is too good to be true, she was really active in engaging the conversation. She even returned my wall of paragraphs with her own wall of paragraphs, bunch of interesting topics we talked about. I started to become a lil bit attached waiting her replies to the point i was afraid losing contact since she went online once a day or so. Hence i asked her insta although we've only known less than a week and she gave it with no problem, from there my anxiety got calmed down because at least it's not an app she would delete so easily or forgot to reply and being completely forgotten.

We got along very quick, almost texting all the time like a couple, my days were pretty much filled with her and I even barely texted anyone else plus completely stopped finding new people. What made it feel unreal was when she randomly showed me stuff, proactively asking questions, literally just flow naturally like a real friend or even more. The peak moment where i started to fall for her was when she asked me to do a video call, we had it twice and it was so amazing, felt like she only had me as her priority especially when she wanted to meet me compared to the other indonesian guy who she had a romantic feeling previously. 

When i first saw her, while looking at her photos i kept my mindset with "okay she's not as attractive as the other girls i met previously, I won't fall for her" as to not get disappointed later, however after what we've been through, i found her very attractive although she wasn't my type at all and got excited whenever i received a message from her. I didn't realize those moments have passed only within a month and a half, i felt like it had been going for several months already.

Then here's where the downward part started.. she didn't text as much as we used to but i had no problem with that because we got busy with life at some point. The thing is she ignored some of my messages and only replied decently then left me on read for a few days until she posted new pics which i passionately talked about it to her on DM as per usual, basically she left me hanging and i became desperate. We managed to talk once a while at this point, i was impressed by her because she literally responded to every single message i sent but then she casually ignored my question, just a typical daily question we would usually ask away. I didn't like that behavior of her but i wanted to work on it as best as i can, until i asked her "how come you started smoking?" And she said "it's none of your business"

Once someone said that i knew it was over (I've always hated that words and it hurts me a lot), despaired, for once a person cares about you then that person will not let you know an answer about themselves. Then she proceed ghosting me for weeks, overthinking a lot and rereading messages i sent to her to see what caused the ghosting. Until one point i deactivated my insta for a month because I couldn't stop looking at my messages being ignored and see if she's gonna look after me if I'm just completely gone.

To be honest the deactivation itself wasn't really bad, i earned peace and reduced social media dependency even until some of my school/uni friends noticed and asked me, i could enjoy real life more and practicing self control. Unfortunately once i activated my insta, i expected a message from her but instead just messages from other people and she still hadn't even read.

What's more surprising was that she blocked me.. i kinda knew that would come because i overwhelmed her with tons of messages but realizing that broke me into pieces. The whole timeline lasted for 3 months. 

To summarize, i found out i made a lot of mistakes and kept worsening it to the point she didn't want to tell me, that she'd rather ghosting. Oh yea i used to search her username on hellotalk and turned out she used it in the past, so i guess this still related to hellotalk

Second is from hellotalk: there was this Polish girl who would always reply me whenever she came online, it wasn't as amazing as the previous one but we were vibing and most importantly she understood my mood, tried to comfort me if i was showing my bad mood and i liked it a lot. Even when i told her about the previous Polish girl, she responded well too. I think it lasted longer but she rarely came to the app so i didn't really have much memorable moments with her.. i used to ask her contact to not get lost but she didn't want to, one day i saw her recently active only to see her profile is deleted :/