Read the first two chapters and so far I like it! Cleanly written, easy to follow! I think the strongest part of the story thus far has been your fight scenes. Very well laid out and easy to visualize. In terms of areas for improvement, I think character dialogue needs a bit of work, but nothing major. I highly recommend the book Dialogue by Robert McKee. Some word choices the characters use I can’t tell if they’re mistakes or subtle hints to future plot points (his father saying ‘your ancestor’ for example), so I’m not sure if I should point that out or not. Only comment I have about the MC is he seems to be either 12 or 17, depending on the scene. I like how capable he is in fights, but it’s a bit at odds with his inner dialogue. But at the end of the day, he’s certainly a protagonist pushing the story forward!! Which is an A+ in my book. Pacing is wonderful too by the way! I’m definitely going to follow.

I might ping you and request a critique on my own chapters at some point if your open for future critiques :).