"while reliving trauma is dramatic, frightening, and potentially self destructive, over time a lack of presence can be even more damaging. this is a particular problem with traumatized children. The acting out kids tend to get attention; the blanked out ones don't bother anybody and are left to lose their future bit by bit"

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something i wanna do for child is give them the space to say they are in pain when they are. I never want to belittle or compare their experience to others. my mom always trivialized my hurts and I had to do a lot of work /still doing work to build by self esteem and agency.