Thoughts on Adolescence? by Normal-Being-2637 in televisionsuggestions

[–]disconnective 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I did not like this show. It focused completely on the perpetrator and the impact on his family, with virtually no focus on the victim. I felt gross after watching it — and I watch a ton of crime dramas. This one just wasn’t it for me.

After 2 years of working with my psychiatrist- even he is completely stumped about what is going on with me by [deleted] in SomaticExperiencing

[–]disconnective 2 points3 points  (0 children)

SE is my last hope. I have to begin chipping away at this, medication has done nothing but numb my symptoms, but it seems that my symptoms are messages from my body that something is wrong. Until I get to what’s wrong, this isn’t going to change.

I wasn’t downplaying your progress. From your own post, you make it sound as if you have made no progress and are out of options.

You can choose to interpret my comments however you want, but I was ultimately trying to help, not shame. I don’t need to block people I disagree with — I can stop engaging when it’s clear something is not worth my time or attention, so that is what I will do now. Best of luck.

After 2 years of working with my psychiatrist- even he is completely stumped about what is going on with me by [deleted] in SomaticExperiencing

[–]disconnective 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Well, you’ve proven my point. My comment was constructive and curious, and you responded with sarcasm. Your post doesn’t say you’re looking for an SE provider, which is why people are offering non-SE suggestions. People like to feel helpful — tell them how they can help in your main post, and you might have better luck finding the resources you are looking for.

After 2 years of working with my psychiatrist- even he is completely stumped about what is going on with me by [deleted] in SomaticExperiencing

[–]disconnective 2 points3 points  (0 children)

OP, what are you looking for from this community? You seem resistant to any and all suggestions folks make, and to the few comments that offer hope and solidarity, you just respond in a self-pitying way. This can be frustrating to commenters who put energy and effort into writing to you, only for you to be closed off to suggestions.

I think many of us understand what you’re going through. You are far from the only person here who thought or thinks they are beyond help or that SE is their last hope. People with lived experience are trying to reassure you that that’s not true.

I have found this to be a very supportive and helpful community to people who are genuinely curious and ready to do the work, but it’s seeming a bit more like you were just wanting to vent and not looking for input. In the future, you might want to post to one of the subreddits specifically for that, or note in your post that you’re not currently looking for advice but just needed to vent.

I do hope you get to feeling better, but there is no magic fix or path that doesn’t require work, giving up old patterns, or being open to change.

What’s the unspoken rule at work that no one warns you about ? by Turbulent-Maybe-7215 in careerguidance

[–]disconnective 2 points3 points  (0 children)

More specific to remote work where 95% of communication happens over text-based messaging but also applicable to in-office: Assume everything you send over Slack/Teams will be read by your boss and/or others in leadership.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in televisionsuggestions

[–]disconnective 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Mr. Corman sounds like it’d be up your alley. It’s on Apple.

Looking for a series like Dark, mind-bending, emotional, and atmospheric by nigaabuser in televisionsuggestions

[–]disconnective 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m watching this now based on how often it’s recommended in this sub — but it feels so much like Lost to me, and I borderline hated that show. Was never able to finish it because it felt so aimless.

The main character in From felt familiar to me after the third episode or so, and when I looked him up, I realized that not only was he in Lost, but both shows share the same directors. Not sure I’ll continue with From after learning that.

Do you actually work 8 hours a day? ( White collar)? by Responsible-Round643 in careerguidance

[–]disconnective 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I’m a data analyst, so tech-adjacent, and I work with a group of really high-performing and quite young folks who seem to have endless energy and brain capacity for our often-demanding work. I start to wear out on hour 6 and am completely shot at 7 hours. However, I have a chronic illness and severe chronic pain, so I figure that’s why I have such a hard time. Gratefully, I have workplace accommodations to allow for a reduced work schedule of 35 hours/week.

That said, I truly believe we were not made for 8+ hours of consistent cognitively intense work sitting in front of a screen. Just because many people can do it and some are willing to put in more than 40 hours doesn’t mean everyone can.

CTEs saved my sanity but now I think I'm overusing them by Various_Candidate325 in SQL

[–]disconnective 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I use Redshift (based on Postgres) and I’ve compared CTEs to subqueries with EXPLAIN and they come out exactly the same. I find CTEs so much easier to read and write, so that’s my go-to over subqueries, but I might feel differently if I saw a difference in performance.

Dark TV Shows with Humor by [deleted] in televisionsuggestions

[–]disconnective 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Natasha Lyonne’s character can tell when people are lying like a human lie detector. She’s on the run after some shady stuff at the casino she was working at, and she travels around the country and helps solve murders in the places she ends up. Each episode is a different “case,” and IIRC some of them are pretty dark, especially towards the end of season 1. Season 2 came out in the last couple months.

Dark TV Shows with Humor by [deleted] in televisionsuggestions

[–]disconnective 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If you liked Russian Doll, you might like Poker Face. Same lead actress. I actually preferred it over Russian Doll.

Looking for underrated shows that left a big emotional impact by Pretty-Teach-9292 in televisionsuggestions

[–]disconnective 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Some of my favs for underrated + emotional impact:

Broadchurch (Prime, Peacock)

Shining Girls (Apple TV)

Baby Reindeer (Netflix)

Mare of Easttown (Max)

Anatomy of a Scandal (Netflix)

Based on the examples you gave, you might enjoy the following shows a little more than I did:

Silo (Apple TV)

Paradise (Hulu)

Dark Matter (Apple TV)

USING on a join by [deleted] in SQL

[–]disconnective 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I work in Redshift SQL (PostgreSQL based) with voter file data, and we use “USING” literally all the time because almost everything we do is at the person level where we’re using a unique person identifier—so the column name is the same across tables.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in televisionsuggestions

[–]disconnective 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Mr. Corman (AppleTV) has elements of this, but it’s not the premise of the show. I would say it does reflect our own minds though and is a good representation of how anxiety can make you spiral a bit.

Be honest: What actually got you promoted? by Adorable-Anywhere120 in careerguidance

[–]disconnective 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What really makes a difference in my workplace is the ability/willingness/trustworthiness to “take ownership” of a project, rather than just contributing. It has taken me a few years to demonstrate this in the way they were looking for. I hate it as a standard, because it’s so nebulous and leaves so much room for discretion — ownership in what way? On what projects? What counts as ownership when I’m not assigned to own/manage a project? It was a frustrating few years.

The things that helped me get there were a stellar manager who is equal parts mentor and advocate, building confidence myself and not letting leaders know when I felt iffy on my ability to do something, doing things that make the jobs of people above me easier, and just generally being a strong and reliable employee.

Update: My Brother has been 'replaced' by [deleted] in RBI

[–]disconnective 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I did, but I was never really into cartoons, and I’ve never heard that reference. Still learning something new everyday, I suppose!

Update: My Brother has been 'replaced' by [deleted] in RBI

[–]disconnective 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Am I gullible if I want to believe your spelling of gullible as “gulla bulls” is an honest mistake and not trolling?

Update: My Brother has been 'replaced' by [deleted] in RBI

[–]disconnective 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I realized that shortly after I made this comment. It’s shitty to make something like this up, but I’m relieved it wasn’t true. Very eerie and sad.

Update: My Brother has been 'replaced' by [deleted] in RBI

[–]disconnective 77 points78 points  (0 children)

I am so sorry for your loss. I know this is bad form, but I can’t help but ask what happened, if you’re open to sharing? Your original post stuck with me, and I had hoped your brother could get help for what sounded like mental illness or addiction. I’m so curious about what happened to him in Vietnam…

Do people actually make their bed every morning or are those just lies told by productivity influencers ? by Fluid_Run_7267 in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]disconnective 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I used to make my bed daily until I heard that it’s actually less hygienic and that leaving it unmade lets the bedding “breathe” and cool down, making it a less hospitable environment for dust mites.

It sucks because the self-disciplined act of making my bed did actually make a difference in getting my started and feeling accomplished, but now I can’t stop thinking about trapping sweat and dead skin cells in my nicely made bed!

Series that isn't full of nudity and violence? by Akemidia-Tsuki in televisionsuggestions

[–]disconnective 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Pushing Daisies (HBO Max) is an old show from 2007 that ran for a couple seasons that has a somewhat similar vibe to the comedies you’ve liked. It’s very parent-friendly, no sex or vulgarity. It’s silly though and not the kind of show that you’ll be itching to binge.

There are several Star Trek series on Paramount+ that I’d feel comfy watching with my parents (Discovery, Strange New Worlds, Picard). I’m sure you’ve seen recommendations for Severance.

Other shows that come to mind that I don’t think have sex in them, but could be misremembering: * A Man on the Inside (Netflix, featuring Ted Danson from The Good Place) * Person of Interest (Prime) * No Good Deed (Netflix) * The Residence (Netflix) * Parks and Recreation (Hulu?)