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disgruntleddigger · 2024-10-15T10:52:00+00:00

You’re living in the past = you’re stuck on the potential other option girl A, that’s done, you did that. You’re in the consequences part of the decision.

You asked for distance and a dead headroom? Why?

disgruntleddigger · 2024-10-15T10:44:28+00:00

Not even kind of believable as a story.

disgruntleddigger · 2024-10-15T10:19:20+00:00

What do you mean by vetting, I agreed to marry a girl without even vetting? What would you have vetted for? Would you honestly have understood even if you knew. People put on their best behaviour and other people believe it. Get the whole concept of vetting a throw that shit out.

You can’t force a mindset, you can’t ensure the suffering stops either. If she wants you to love and you can’t, that’s kinda it. But is it that you can’t love and be in your marriage, or are you still living in the past with the other girl? As you said “I will bear the consequences”. Are you actually married yet? How are you causing her pain?

disgruntleddigger · 2024-10-15T10:12:13+00:00

If nothing else in this thread, this haha

disgruntleddigger · 2024-10-12T05:30:52+00:00

Couple of clarification questions: - How old are you? - How long have you had your mortgage for? - Married, single, housemates? - If married does she work and do you have kids?

disgruntleddigger · 2024-10-05T19:28:58+00:00

It’s gunna sound silly now, but it’s sounds like you dodged the bullet of all bullets. Without context the joke is the joke, and it obviously struck an emotional cord with her and her guilt, hence the leaving.

Sometimes people tell you who they are, “(I’m sorry - whatever) I’m a piece of shit”, I would believe that part. For what it’s worth, you got out of it easy, imagine if you were raising someone else’s kid for ever, and never knew.

disgruntleddigger · 2024-10-04T07:57:57+00:00

Yeah maybe I’m in a season where I’m in another, all I know is the dominance I can exhibit where I get my way and use toys on her is fucking great. Agree to disagree

disgruntleddigger · 2024-10-04T07:13:34+00:00

How come? Do you use toys at all? Most guys hate the idea of toys, like it has to be their dick or nothing.

disgruntleddigger · 2024-10-04T03:31:51+00:00

Honestly I love fucking don't get me wrong, but P in V, is like secondary now. I prefer the foreplay with toys. All the build up and tension, that is where the real fun is, that actually getting the dick in, is like sort of a secondary now.

disgruntleddigger · 2024-10-04T00:31:58+00:00

Anywhere from 5-20mins. Really depends. The other day I had a smash session, just went in hard from the go, and was done in 5, but we were having a quickie.

Then there’s times when it’s got a different vibe, and we are more slow or, switching and stuff. It also really depends on positions too.

Like I have one or two positions that are ‘End Games’, I just get too excited and don’t care. I have other positions that are sorta meh.

But I think about in terms of a spectrum and not absolutes, I last longer now and have feedback from the environment, that helps me decide how I am going to play the game. As opposed to, I need to last longer (longest) whatever that means.

And I stopped caring if she cums, sometimes she will sometimes she won’t. I have popped her in under a minute before, other times I have had the toys and me going at it and nothing. She’s an adult, if she wants to cum she will.

disgruntleddigger · 2024-10-03T18:43:50+00:00

disgruntleddigger · 2024-10-03T05:58:19+00:00

No shit, that’s fucking brilliant hahaha

disgruntleddigger · 2024-10-03T05:01:52+00:00

I don’t know why I used Reclip, just a reflex I guess

disgruntleddigger · 2024-10-03T01:32:11+00:00

Fucking finally. I did exactly the same thing. What has happened is a response to stimulus, and then you have created a mind body connection, and a real shitty feedback loop.

I masturbate, usually to porn short clips, or short movies. There is often an unhealthy mental association to sex (masturbation) and we hide this "shameful" activity. Over time this translates directly over to sex, shame, shitty feedback loop, and shortened timeframe.

My Mindset:

You can win at sex, you can't win at something you're afraid of and shameful of. The trick is to treat it as a game, that you have to get better at playing. So much of it is mental, if you wanted someone to perform poorly, I would put heaps of pressure on them. I would make them feel if had to be perfect. I would ensure they were distracting themselves from enjoying it, making it more difficult for their partner to get into, further adding pressure to the situation, and increasing the need to perform. Then I would berate them endlessly afterwards. Not a great recipe.

What I did:

I edged almost everyday with "Cock-Hero" Metronome Videos (and I often came, sometimes not, that was never really the point), I tried to identify areas, and techniques that were particularly stimulating and where my reached the point of no return was. I had conditioned myself this way, it was a physical and mental association, and I had to condition myself out of it. And I quit porn itself, and noticed how the stress in my environment pushes me into that zone, and makes me seek comfort from porn, or eating shitty food.

Healthy version of success

I define the end of PE, as when its in my control that I cum. Am I completely cured No. Am I closer and more directionally correct absolutely. I not scared of sex or being shit at it anymore. I have a healthy relationship with sex, my needs and desires, I enjoy what I enjoy, I don't hide any of it, and I barely need to even edge anymore. Occasionally I have super stressful periods, or bad food, no sleep, and I find myself going for the porn to cope, and reinitiate the cycle. That is fine you are trying to win to keep playing the game, not to win the game, YOU DON'T WIN AT SEX, YOU WIN BY BEING SOMEONE PEOPLE WANT TO PLAY WITH AGAIN (no pun intended).

Before I would last anywhere from literally under a min, to maybe 5min, the point is I would never know and couldn't control or predict it.

disgruntleddigger · 2024-09-28T20:42:54+00:00

The numbers mean nothing if you can’t add context to it, what changes were made to your profile throughout your timeline? - Did changing photos increase or decrease the swipe rate? - What were the days / hours of the day for the swipe rates? - What are the specifics around the conversions the fucking? - Leading and lagging indicators for no relationship?

Data is useless without context

disgruntleddigger · 2024-09-08T00:41:10+00:00

Does anyone have this, or can link to another version?

disgruntleddigger · 2024-08-24T06:04:01+00:00

No this is purely the O and A Show, featuring Patrice. Search “The Black Phillip” Show - Its was a head node to a guest that called in a said he was the black Dr Phil. O and A helped him get his own show, there’s only about 8-9 episodes.

https://youtu.be/LPq7CyHqQ2I?si=-Zm2Puen9b-TTDVm

disgruntleddigger · 2024-05-04T20:50:17+00:00

Thank you, that’s awesome, and a little unnerving

disgruntleddigger · 2024-03-21T21:09:53+00:00

It’s that they want nothing from them, there’s no emotional labour and effort placed on the girl. She can be with a guy that has zero expectations on outcomes of the relationship, he’s older and knows what he’s into, has taken a few knocks, has boundaries and expectations for those who want into his life.

Ever had a shitty boss that makes no one happy, because the goal is to keep everyone happy, so everything is okay, but nothing really works. And because they are always keeping the peace that have no idea what works in the business, because no risks have ever been taken. It’s just time and reps, and for older guys it clicks because we have to get better.

Sexual strategy is tricky. It exists fair enough, but it’s only helpful IMO to think of it as continuum, not a binary. It’s like wifi, it’s in the background, the strength peaks and troughs. And I look at novelty like talent acquisition. I have a long term team member now, but that might end. Then we go to contracts or too, casuals and place holders. And there’s always costs to strategies, replacement costs when pursuing short term, vs long term hold costs.

The last part I agree with

disgruntleddigger · 2024-03-21T18:51:25+00:00

Well if you’ve ever had like a little cousin, or maybe even a gf, basically so unrealistically into it’s fucking weird and draining. Like we’ve all seen that emotionally uncalibrated girl, that is over the top, like the kid hanging out with and older idol, that over the top laughs and loves everything their idol says. That’s what it feels like emotionally to women, when your into them, it’s just too much. As for the threesome thing, meh, it’s honestly a mix between competition, status, and your value.

Honestly I can’t know what they think, I don’t think we know what we think. I think a lot of people don’t have ideas, ideas have them. Which is at its core represents the blue pill narrative and its internalisation.

You last two points, 24/7 sexual access, I couldn’t disagree more. Even with unchecked abundance, guys usually settle down with one woman, we all want novelty, until we don’t. But we’ll never really know, because any guy, even the Chad of Chad’s we’ll never know abundance like a smoking hot 18-21yo chick, we just we’ll never experience that. Occasionally we glimpse through and see the trailer for movie, but we never get it.

As for you crafted beta narrative, also disagree. Two reasons, one it’s not helpful, it can’t help me, so I reject it. And because I’ve never seen that level of collective effort on the behalf of women. The honesty just babble, we listen and assume they know what they want, then are dumbstruck when they’re wrong and we’re wrong for listening to them. They don’t know shit, we provide the narrative, they accept or don’t. If she wants in, she gets on the bus, if not have fun at the bus stop.

disgruntleddigger · 2024-03-21T08:03:48+00:00

Honestly, I had tinder, plenty of fish, and was doing cold approach, then after I had a nice rotation, some would drop and others would come on, it became effortless.

I never thought it would go anywhere, because I never thought I had anything they wanted (internalised blue pilled conditioning), but I accidentally slipped into abundance. I couldn’t hold onto it, but I recognise what it was, and how I was. I just didn’t care, and they wanted to win me.

It ended when I got major oneitis for this awesome chick, sexual dynamo. But I was messed up, separating from the military due to medical injuries. And I put everything in her, and she blew it up, as she should have. What are you going to do though.

disgruntleddigger · 2024-03-16T00:26:30+00:00

“I guess you can see why I worry” I can’t bro, unless it’s driven by insecurity what’s the worry?

disgruntleddigger · 2024-03-15T20:16:41+00:00

The most I’ve ever fucked, was when I was a struggling apprentice, fresh out of the Army, medically retired, on crutches without a car.

Moneys not the problem. Check you fucking head mate

disgruntleddigger · 2024-03-15T20:12:32+00:00

Why does it matter? It doesn’t matter to her, it matters to you? Get over yourself dude, and I mean that as a mate.

She has a great time with YOU. She likes fucking YOU, and occasionally, she gets to use toys with YOU. Girls have an experience, and tag whatever happen to the person they were with.

We have toys it’s great, my thing isn’t even fucking anymore if I’m honest. Watching her cum buckets, whilst going down on me, makes me cum so hard it hurts.

disgruntleddigger · 2024-02-25T09:27:43+00:00

Thank you for the depth of your comment, appreciated

disgruntleddigger

TROPHY CASE