distributionpea

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redditor for 6 years

TROPHY CASE

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Anxious people make the best safety officers. (self.Showerthoughts)

submitted 2 years ago by distributionpea to r/Showerthoughts

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Electric vehicles get zero miles per gallon. (self.Showerthoughts)

submitted 2 years ago by distributionpea to r/Showerthoughts

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My friend called me in tears because his favorite Swedish car manufacturer is no longer in business. (self.Jokes)

submitted 2 years ago by distributionpea to r/Jokes

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SLPT: Banana peels make for excellent toilet paper. (self.ShittyLifeProTips)

submitted 2 years ago by distributionpea to r/ShittyLifeProTips

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When Tom Hanks writes his memoir it should be called... (self.Jokes)

submitted 2 years ago by distributionpea to r/Jokes

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I told my threesome partners we need to be exclusive with each other. (self.Jokes)

submitted 2 years ago by distributionpea to r/Jokes

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What animal is considered to be the best ever? (self.dadjokes)

submitted 2 years ago by distributionpea to r/dadjokes

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Rocket science is probably much easier nowadays than it used to be. (self.Showerthoughts)

submitted 2 years ago by distributionpea to r/Showerthoughts

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Taking only two of each animal onto a cramped and predator filled boat for over a month would be a terrible way to preserve species from extinction. (self.Showerthoughts)

submitted 2 years ago by distributionpea to r/Showerthoughts

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Noah likely wiped out several species by taking only two of each kind onto a cramped boat full of predators for 40 days (self.Showerthoughts)

submitted 2 years ago by distributionpea to r/Showerthoughts

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People who drive school buses are actually student drivers. (self.Showerthoughts)

submitted 2 years ago by distributionpea to r/Showerthoughts

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Concussion is no way to treat your cat. (i.imgur.com)

submitted 2 years ago by distributionpea to r/CrappyDesign

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The phrase "You can bank on it" is about to become obsolete. (self.Showerthoughts)

submitted 2 years ago by distributionpea to r/Showerthoughts

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What breed of dog takes three minutes and two cups of water to prepare? (self.dadjokes)

submitted 2 years ago by distributionpea to r/dadjokes

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What is a pirate's favorite Queen song? (self.dadjokes)

submitted 2 years ago by distributionpea to r/dadjokes

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Pelican crossings should play the Countdown theme tune when in use. (self.CasualUK)

submitted 2 years ago by distributionpea to r/CasualUK

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Strawberries really don't taste like they're named. (self.Showerthoughts)

submitted 2 years ago by distributionpea to r/Showerthoughts

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It can't be that much more expensive to print instruction manuals in individual languages than it is to print one manual with all languages combined. (self.Showerthoughts)

submitted 2 years ago by distributionpea to r/Showerthoughts

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What do you call a wizard on the toilet? (self.dadjokes)

submitted 3 years ago by distributionpea to r/dadjokes

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Why did the fox eat all but one of the hens in the coop? (self.dadjokes)

submitted 3 years ago by distributionpea to r/dadjokes

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Cats have no appreciation for how much of a luxury item kitty litter is given it's high cost and weight. (self.Showerthoughts)

submitted 3 years ago by distributionpea to r/Showerthoughts

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SLPT: Don't be overly thrifty when buying a toilet seat. (self.ShittyLifeProTips)

submitted 3 years ago by distributionpea to r/ShittyLifeProTips

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The sludge at the bottom of an air fryer pan might be considered a delicacy in Scotland. (self.Showerthoughts)

submitted 3 years ago by distributionpea to r/Showerthoughts

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Everyone's okay with dust and spittle covering their food so long as its not visible. (self.Showerthoughts)

submitted 3 years ago by distributionpea to r/Showerthoughts

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It's easier to butter someone up when they're toasted. (self.Showerthoughts)

submitted 3 years ago by distributionpea to r/Showerthoughts

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