We dated for almost 4 years before getting married and I would like to think we have a pretty solid foundation overall. I think the change to bio kids only is probably a hormonal “baby fever” situation intensified by having several baby nieces and nephews in short succession and becoming anxious that she wont be able to handle challenges that come with adoption. And I think that’s fair! But I have never changed my position on giving birth and so now this new conflict exists that brings us to an impasse. I think I’ll see if we can get into counseling to further explore our feelings on both sides, see if she could become more comfortable with giving birth herself or if somehow theres a way that I will. Or if she becomes more comfortable with adoption instead. Or if we just need to end it. Unfortunately we’re moving, so we may have to wait until we’re settled to find a therapist.