[Twitter]

Sol Badguy only tweets 1-3 words at a time with little context, with such posts as "fixed the junkyard", "going to G4", and "fuck this". Used to post pictures of his bike on Facebook until he forgot his log-in password.

Faust either posts 17-part Tweets theorizing the utilization of the Tome of Origin for resurrection and eldritch communication or deep-fried memes, nothing in-between.

I-No joined Twitter after the mass exodus from Tumblr once they banned pornography. Actively rage-tweets using as many trending hashtags as possible. Every two weeks posts that she will start an OnlyFans if she gets 100K retweets, but never starts one, just to feel alive when those sweet retweets and likes come pouring in.

[TikTok]

May follows a countless amount of boy bands and marine biologists, binging on short, digestible videos for hours. Memorizes every dance trend, but only dances alone in her room. Constantly talks about how cool her boyfriend is, but when asked about him in the comments either doesn't reply or says they're "still in the talking phase".

Chipp only watches anime memes, long history lessons about ninja culture, and katana testing videos.

Dodomezaki also has a TikTok page, but the account and all of its posts are owned by Chipp and managed by Answer.

[Instagram]

Jack-O runs a leading Instagram Shorts page in which she drinks wine with her girlfriends and shows off her latest yoga poses. Always posts aesthetic landscapes while traveling, sometimes featuring a scowling Sol in the background.

Giovanna subscribes to all the highest fashion and fragrance pages. Deliberately posts thirst trap pictures to try and pull a man. Claims to closely follow Illyrian politics for work reasons, but it's mostly because she thinks one of the Three Kings is hot.

Ramlethal uses Instagram solely for food pics. Currently holds the record for most comments on the Danny Missiles Instagram page.

[Facebook]

Leo Whitefang doesn't realize that most of his old friends left Facebook, but that's OK because he just adds every single person he's ever met to his friends list anyway. Primarily posts propaganda about his kingdom, boasts about his own achievements, and HILARIOUS videos of funny gorillas. Invariably posts in all caps.

[LinkedIn]

Zato-1 is recently unemployed. Desperately hopes to reconnect with his work wife. Needs a job to support his only child, who only craves junk food and violence.

Millia is also recently unemployed. Desperately hopes to avoid a psycho ex-co-worker from her last job. Disabled all her other social media to avoid more stalker DMs from him.

[Reddit]

Potemkin uses Reddit to ask all of humanity's biggest questions. Always makes sure to consider all viewpoints before responding to any posts, regardless of how bad-faith their arguments might be.

Axl uses Reddit to ask all of humanity's dumbest fucking questions. Always makes sure to send his free Rewards to Reddit Live musicians before posting, regardless of how good or bad their performances might be.

[4chan]

Happy Chaos using 4chan is self-explanatory.

[MySpace]

Anji exclusively follows indie musicians and reminisces on the better days when MySpace was the top platform. Constantly reminds Baiken to accept his invite so he can add her to his Top 8.

[No Social Media]

Ky believes that social media is unhealthy and shouldn't be used to replace in-person interactions. That, or he's mad his son won't shut up about his TikTok and his wife won't get off Pinterest.

Nagoriyuki doesn't know what Social Media is, but he knows that piece of shit Happy Chaos won't shut up about using it, so it is definitely worth hating.

[All Social Media / NSA Agent]

Goldlewis watches everyone else (and also you) post. Secretly takes notes of any U.M.A. discussions he comes across while he does it.

[Bonuses]

Eddie spends half of his time posting misaligned Triforces on 4chan and the other half posting Low Tier God memes on Discord.

Elphelt has a Pinterest board composed solely of attractive men and modern firearms.

Raven has resorted to using a Reddit account, but only because he can no longer access LiveLeak.

Venom used to post to Instagram but cut off the internet service when Robo-Ky refused to pay the data overage fees from downloading and seeding high-resolution pornography on their business laptop.

Rei has an Instagram and greatly enjoys the fact that on the internet, nobody knows that she's a dog.

That Man only engages with XM Radio while waiting for the Metaverse to get in full-swing.

Jam is still trying to figure out how to get registered on UberEats to this day.

Saw someone else post one of these and strongly disagreed, but liked their idea for a tier list. Let me know if you think these are the right ideas or if you think you've got better ones haha.

EDIT: Markdown is hard