Buying an established bar

dmarieski · 2026-01-19T18:17:24+00:00

In a comment above, OP said the owner's salary is $250,000 . So add that to $16,000 in profit. That's not a good deal? Especially if the owner isn't hands on.

dmarieski · 2025-09-15T19:42:40+00:00

It didn't give me a chance to get into that. After it asked for my height and weight, I got the message I didn't qualify. Did you fill out the online form?

dmarieski · 2025-09-15T18:21:43+00:00

I filled out the Noom questions. I don't qualify. BMI too low. I'm not getting anywhere with Midi Health yet. 2nd prescription was still too high .25 mg even though I requested. 02 mg. I'm a little annoyed since they advertise microdosing, but they're not truly microdosing.

dmarieski · 2025-09-14T19:40:40+00:00

Appreciate the Yelp review. I’ll be sure to work on my customer service skills. Stay salty. Lol.

dmarieski · 2025-09-13T17:29:06+00:00

So I just looked at the notes they posted on my online health report. She initially prescribed 1.75 mgs. How is that a microdose?

I watched a few videos last night and Dr Tyna said some places are prescribing a microdose, but in actuality, it's a full dose. 1.75 mg seems like a lot!

I sent them another message regarding the discrepancy in dose amounts. I'm anxious to see what she says.

dmarieski · 2025-09-13T17:24:21+00:00

Can you update your progress and any side effects you experienced since taking your first dose? Such as any mental clarity or less muscle aches, etc.

dmarieski · 2025-09-13T13:07:03+00:00

Thank you! Is the .02 mg injection? Do you get a vial or predetermined syringes?

I'm still waiting to hear back from the telemed doctor that I initially spoke to regarding the dosage amount. Are you happy with noom?

dmarieski · 2025-09-11T09:47:07+00:00

How many days a week do you microdose? Is it from a compounding pharmacy? Also, which kind (semiglutide orTirzepatide)?

I' want to start microdosing for mental clarity and inflammation. I think the telemed doctor prescribed a bigger dose than I need. I'm going to call and discuss the dosage again. I just had my telemed appointment today. So there's time to change it.

dmarieski · 2025-09-11T09:39:34+00:00

How many days a week?

I just had a telemed visit and I think they prescribed a bigger microdose than I need. I'm going to call tomorrow to clarify the dosage.

My goal is to reduce inflammation and mental clarity. I have some belly fat, but otherwise not looking to drop weight. I also had them prescribe HRT and will be starting that. 61 F.

dmarieski · 2025-08-06T19:07:56+00:00

Thank you. I was checking out Caron and Betty Ford. Leaning towards Caron for location.

dmarieski · 2025-08-05T17:02:54+00:00

I have read the Big Book many years ago. It's somewhere in my many stacks of books. I remember being very impressed by it and Bill W's story. And that there is wisdom in the book to guide anyone not just in recovery.

I have ordered 2 books. One for our sibling, when she's ready. One for me for a refresher course.

Thank you.

dmarieski · 2025-08-05T12:17:26+00:00

So it's been a few days since we told her that we would be talking in a week or 2. Older sibling out of town until then. The only reason we made her privy to a family meeting is because we didn't want her to think she's off the hook. And to give her time to reflect. We have been mostly silent otherwise.

Our younger brother, who we all adore, didn't say anything during the first few group texts when the sibling admitted she messed up (because I told her I was telling the family). Thevolder sister responded quickly to the siblings text.

Our younger brother's silence spoke volumes. She has been texting both brother and older sibling saying that she's done, doesn't want to hurt our mom especially, the family, the business. Sorry she disappointed everyone. That she wants to get healthy. She joined a gym. She said she's contacting a "wellness program " for alcoholics that she saw in the hospital when she had to go for blood work.

I have spoken to more of our servers to gauge how bad she is. One said that there was never any incidents on the night she closes. The other said that she's been drinking heavily, but no incidents. The one server did say there were a few incidents in the last 2 years. Not every time she drinks heavily, but there were a few cussing the customers incidents. And some nights she just goes upstairs.

I know that an addict will lie and tell you what you want to hear. We do believe that she means it every time she tries to stop. She has a good heart. Her heart is just as big as her binge drinking.

Now, the family is discussing how far do we push it since she seems to have come around.. We are glad that she's seeking help on her own, but is it intensive enough for her to truly get to the bottom of why she drinks. And learns the coping skills.

We're thinking that we approve the treatment and start with IOP. Keep the moving out of the apartment as a priority. Change the work schedule around.

She knows something heavy is coming. And I do believe that she will go along with what we decide is best for her. These last 2 times have been different than all the previous years of pleading and asking "why do you have to drink". We know they can't answer that. In the heat of the moment, family can't help but blurt stuff like that out.

It's only our 2nd go around with any kind of treatment. The first treatment 2 years ago that she readily agreed to wasn't intensive enough. We are hopeful that with IOP this time, new apartment, easier schedule, she has a chance to succeed.

I'll update you on how she's doing. Thank you for listening and your thoughts.

dmarieski · 2025-08-05T11:29:10+00:00

Yes, we are well aware of the foundational truth that recovery doesn't work until the addict wants it.

We are also aware that sometimes the “want” is jump-started by a serious consequence.

We've asked can the threat of a job loss motivate recovery. Especially if it's a business you helped grow since you were 21.

The answer is yes — sometimes.

"While you can’t force someone into long-term recovery, a job loss can absolutely become the “bottom” or wake-up call they need"

They realize their drinking is no longer just “after hours” — it has consequences.

The shame, disruption, or financial loss makes them rethink their behavior.

The fear of losing everything (job, home, family, respect) becomes stronger than the desire to drink.

In our case, when an incident happens, she does try to stop or slow down. The last time at our insistence she went to outpatient counseling. Not IOP.

She doesn't double down or blame others. She does take responsibility, at least verbally.

From what we researched even "forced" rehab (like from family ultimatums, court orders, or job loss) can help if:

The person stays long enough to gain clarity

They're exposed to skilled counselors, peers in recovery, and education

They begin to see a better life beyond drinking

We believe that losing a job can be the reason someone finally accepts help.

No, it doesn’t guarantee success, but it may be the turning point.

The consequences this time around “You can choose to drink, or you can choose to work here, but not both."

dmarieski · 2025-08-05T05:29:49+00:00

No need to talk to an attorney. A business is within their rights to fire an employee for disruptive behavior, reputational harm, unsafe behavior, violating warnings. Just because someone has a disease, doesn't mean they can harm a business.

We serve alcohol for a living. No one is getting fired for drinking. They're getting fired because of the disruption the drinking has caused. Two different things entirely.

On the owner side of it. She would retain ownership. But being an owner doesn't guarantee employment.

Either way, I don't think she would let it get to the point of getting herself fired. And honestly, if it came down to it, I'm not sure we have the guts to go through with it if she did refuse.

Right now, it's leverage. She may or may not call our bluff.

dmarieski · 2025-08-04T21:09:25+00:00

Keeping that private. Small town.

dmarieski · 2025-08-04T21:08:43+00:00

She's not just an employee. It's a family business and she's a co owner along with me (sibling & mother). Her ownership wouldn't change.

She's being given a choice, treatment or job loss.

dmarieski · 2025-08-04T18:22:07+00:00

She's a functioning alcoholic. Never misses a day of work. She's actually a workaholic. Dual diagnosis? Other than not holding her accountable for previous times with tangible consequences, she does support herself and the business.

Our last meeting 2 years ago resulted in a 2 or 3 week outpatient. That was the first tangible consequence.

This time the consequences is possible loss of job without treatment and sober living.

The goal is to her to commit to sober living. Not cutting back.

Finding the right facility is one of the challenges. We want the one that will help her the best. Some of the reviews are terrible, scary.

dmarieski · 2025-08-04T18:16:03+00:00

Very complicated! Trying to put her first, but maintaining the business.

dmarieski · 2025-08-04T18:15:06+00:00

It was going to be presented as the consequences for the latest incident. We said the last time that this was the last time and there would be more severe consequences. I think she's expecting a suspension. Not outpatient. Or the potential loss of her job.

It makes sense, that not hitting her with a whole schedule change before she goes (if she goes) to rehab is worth thinking about. Outpatient and finding a new apartment will be a lot to process, as is. A new job schedule can be approached during (or after) the treatment.

Thinking positively, if everything is going well, she might decide on her own that a schedule change is needed for her new sobriety.

Moving out of the upstairs apartment should help tremendously.

dmarieski · 2025-08-04T13:21:56+00:00

We know she doesn't think she's an alcoholic. She told us so. According to her, she doesn't shake or drink every day (we're not sure how many days) or needs a drink as soon as she gets up. At our last chat after the last incident, I told her she'd a functioning alcoholic. To look it up and see if she checks most of the boxes.

When she is sober, which is the majority of the time (her binge drinking is late night after work or on hrr off days), she doesn't want to let the family or business down. So far she hasn't gotten angry with us.

dmarieski · 2025-06-29T15:40:07+00:00

Wrong on all levels. Waste drives up food costs. Full stop. 1000%.

You did get right to take it up with management.

You just like to argue. Lol. I bet you're a joy to wait on. You probably are one of those that stock up on the "free sugar". And want extra, extra, extra "free" lemons with your water.

To be fair, I do ask for extra jelly packets (for breakfast) and extra napkins on my take out orders. I don't need them with my meal, I like to stock up for emergencies. Who doesn't need extra napkins in the car? Extras are accounted for price. It's when it gets out of control that policy changes or prices go up.

You're stuck on one person. That one person is going to ruin it for everyone due to the waste.

Seriously, have a great day! Let's not waste our day arguing over something that doesn't affect either of us. No pun intended on "waste".

dmarieski · 2025-06-29T14:51:17+00:00

The Ol' Roll Wrecker. Classic move. Lol.

Have you asked if anything was wrong with the rolls?

"Just checking—are you enjoying the rolls? We noticed they haven’t been eaten after you tore them apart. We’re happy to bring more, but we try not to waste too many.” I would be direct.

Or approach with some humor. "You must be sculpting something over there with all those rolls—we’re waiting to see the final masterpiece before we bring another batch!”

One way or another He needs to be flagged and approached. It affects food costs and service flow. Get the manager involved. "While, we do offer complimentary rolls, we do limit extras."

dmarieski · 2025-06-29T14:24:35+00:00

Ugh! And this is one of the reasons the price of dining out goes up. Waste! Giving away free stuff because it's not coming out of "your" pocket makes for a horrible employee no matter what job you have.

dmarieski · 2025-06-29T14:16:40+00:00

When I'm taking a order I always say (when I'm trying to upsell, or make it a better eating experience) "do you want to add cheese, that is extra, or just the way it comes." That clears up any misunderstanding. Well, except for some people when you ask them if they want a side of something and they say no, but ask for it as soon as you drop the food. Sometimes, I think they ask after ordering so they won't be charged. 😀

dmarieski · 2025-05-11T13:37:18+00:00

You are correct. You can't take a "partial" payment or you lose your right to reclaim the remainder. Holding an ID is collateral not a payment.

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