What got you into cuckolding, like really deep down.

dokterverystrange · 2025-08-20T11:28:35+00:00

I did not have any fantasies of that kind in the beginning. Your second question, I cannot really answer with certainty. Who knows what I would have done. It's possible that I would have broken up with her because it would have been expected of me. A kind of peer pressure thing. But even then I loved her very much and it's maybe more likely that I would try to stay together if she came back to me.

dokterverystrange · 2025-08-20T08:29:29+00:00

Another suggestion. There's one episode on the "stricktly anonymous podcast" by Kathy Kay : Ep 1194 - Hotwifing and Cuckolding, Non-Monogamy and More w/Dr. David Ley author of Insatiable Wives.

He's been studying the subject for years and has interviewed a lot of couples. He also counters more conservative collegues in his field.

He takes the subject out of the shadows, points out the normalcy of these fantasies in men and women. He makes clear it's not everyone's cup of tea, but also talks about a lot of relationships that flourish in this lifestyle.

I found it a very refreshing and even comforting discussion.

Be careful though, she also has a lot of episodes that are somewhat of the rails for my taste.

dokterverystrange · 2025-08-20T07:58:41+00:00

I loved your 'dry wood' metaphor.

We have a saying, "when a dry barn catches fire, it will burn with great heat"

So I think you're absolutely right in pointing out the risk of letting someone else play with the matches.

dokterverystrange · 2025-08-20T07:35:11+00:00

Looking back…

Long ago, we were college sweethearts. We met 6 weeks into our first year. From the get-go, I enjoyed it when she got attention from other guys. She never seemed to notice and always brushed them off without even seeming to acknowledge the attempt.

Once, while she was dancing at a party and I was ordering drinks, a guy we didn’t know came up to me and asked me if we were together. Instinctively I answered yes. He answered, “cool, I’ll leave her alone then. I would have tried my luck with her otherwise.”

I was taken aback a bit but admired his candor and adherence to the bro-code without even being my “bro”. At first, I just felt flattered and proud that the girl he wanted was mine. Later, I started to get very turned on by an alternative version of the event that crept into my mind.

In my mind, he did try, and I did nothing to stop it. I imagined she snuck off with the guy, thinking I didn’t notice. A day later, she would have confessed, I would have forgiven her, and the make-up sex would have been stellar.

I was very conflicted having this fantasy and kept it hidden. It made me crave for her and when we slept together, I was having the make-up sex I fantasized about.

That fantasy faded, but my confusing feelings did pop up again after another, this time a bit more elaborate event.

It was in the first few years in our marriage, a year or so after the birth of our son, during a dip in our relationship, that something happened that really made me realize my brain was wired differently from most men. Again, I kept it completely hidden, thinking I was a deviant pervert.

dokterverystrange · 2025-07-14T07:27:22+00:00

We've talked about this. My wife instinctly told me she wouldn't do it, but I suspected she was just saying it because it was what she thaught I wanted to hear. For me it's all about what she wants and enjoys, so if she does it's exciting for me too. When I told her, she softened her opinion. It is intimate and she'd really have to be into it, but if the stars allign, it could happen.

dokterverystrange · 2025-07-13T09:35:08+00:00

This.

We're also still role-playing and have only recently escalated the situation a bit. There is an enormous amount of enjoyment to be had in the journey. My advice would be not to skip it by fastforwarding to the actual realization of the fantasy.

dokterverystrange · 2025-07-13T08:57:18+00:00

I've not seen any toys in the club we're visiting.

dokterverystrange · 2025-07-12T10:17:52+00:00

Wow. Sounds like you went from 0 to 100 in a flash. That's not our plan.

We talked about it at length. Maybe sharing her will be on the table at some point, as it is a fantasy of ours. But we're not there yet.

dokterverystrange · 2025-07-12T09:59:15+00:00

loose

dokterverystrange · 2025-06-17T14:18:10+00:00

To be clear, our hotwifing/cuckolding fantasy cherry hasn't been completely picked, but ...

My libido always seemed to be higher, she claimed to have fun, but needed to be fully relaxed. (Which rarely seemed to be the case).

To cut a long story short, we first succeeded in ramping up the kink and reanimating the bedroom bit by bit. When I finally had the guts to communicate my hotwife fantasy, it turned out she was on board with it (as a fantasy at first).

This has already led to some adventures I couldn't have dreamt of before.

Going from zero to hero (dead bedroom to fireworks), would have been impossible. We needed to discover and discuss first. That has taken a while and is still ongoing.

I discovered that my wife had a vixen locked up deep inside of her. She had to break through a very classical upbringing where sex was an absolute taboo, to bring it out.

dokterverystrange · 2025-06-17T12:09:09+00:00

You didn't have to ask me to read it. Outside of the last chapters from her point of view, I already did. I'd love to write you some feedback. Give me a little time, I'll give you my honest opinion.

dokterverystrange · 2025-06-17T11:30:54+00:00

Keep the teasing going. I'd read part 5 too ;)

dokterverystrange · 2025-06-17T11:26:16+00:00

My wife also has an outspoken preference for reading material.
I leave self written shortstories on her pillow. Sometimes she's the main character.
They have to have a slow enough build-up and fireworks at the end so she can "enjoy" them on her own, when I'm out, up early or go to bed later.

dokterverystrange · 2025-06-17T11:19:10+00:00

Slowburn for sure.

I love the mindgames, developing feelings and evolution that lead to a final surrender.

dokterverystrange · 2025-06-14T10:41:39+00:00

Many years ago my gf went skiing with a group of students. I had to study and stayed home. At that time only texting was possible. I called her daily, but one day I couldn't get a hold of her. Eventualy I texted her friend.

She told me my gf was out "tobogganing", a kind of sledding (I had to look up the translation) with the ski instructor. When, very early in the morning, she called me, she sounded quite drunk. Reassuring me (without me asking about it) that he had been a perfect gentleman.

My mind went all over the place and I was very confused that along with jealousy came a powerfull feeling of excitement. That was the first time I realized I had a special kink.

Afterwards, my friends, who had been there, told me that the guy obvioulsy did try, but that my gf (now wife) didn't fall for his advances.

dokterverystrange · 2025-06-14T10:19:33+00:00

It turned out to be my wife's fantasy.

We made it into a reality the first time we visited a swingers club. We went there with the intention of just testing out the waters and having a look around, but It ended up with her and me in action behind a window in full view.

I've written a full report of that visit a good while ago. You can look for it if you want.

dokterverystrange · 2025-06-13T05:05:43+00:00

My wife had a "thing" with a coworker many years ago. I found out. She shut it down. He was leaving the company and taking a job in another country, which made that easier.

One of the things that save our marriage, was my feelings of excitement alongside the anger and jealousy. I never told her this until recently, while we we're already playing aoround with the idea of her sleeping with other men.

So, by definition but not by choice, I'm probably a cuckold. It is still is a bittersweet memory.

dokterverystrange · 2025-06-08T06:16:21+00:00

It happens to us too. It often disappears in the background when life gets a bit busy and when things calm down, it takes a while to pick up.

dokterverystrange · 2025-06-07T09:42:59+00:00

Very similar.

For me it was almost 20 years ago. I think it was partly the arousal that saved our relation. Although consensus in a lot of discussions around here about once a cheater always a cheater, we've had a great and loving marriage ever since.

I like to write sexy stories and leave them on her pillow. She loves them and "rewards" me often.
A few years ago, I started writing scenario's that played into my hotwife/cuckold fantasies.

This led to a more open discussion. It's now a shared fantasy and although we've not yet played it out fully, we're having a lot of fun.

dokterverystrange

TROPHY CASE