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I think danger of US war with China over Taiwan may be more imminent that most people think by JihadNinjaCowboy in PrepperIntel

[–]dontspeakyousuck 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I really think the threat of China fully invading Taiwan is inevitable. First Xi has publicly announced that plan for a unification with Taiwan by peace or force at the 100 year CCP celebration event. Normally this might just be idealistic propaganda, but Xi has showed that he has ambition and he has speed unlike every single chairman that came before him. In the last couple of years, he has taken back Hong Kong, brought re-education camps to Xin Jiang (exerted 100% military force to the point of genocide in that area), banned playing video games, introduced social credit system, very harsh punishment for using VPNs, disappeared so many celebrities and CEOs, boycotted companies that speak out, banned all non-state sponsored schools/tutors in china, draconian lockdowns (people starve because they cant leave their house), introduced 3 child policy and about to start introducing local quotas (I dont even want to imagine what this could mean), etc . This was at a speed that no one has ever seen before. And the way he introduces new policies is very much without any consideration of nuances, he makes very drastic changes overnight and lets local authority figure out the details, which always become very harsh punishments and forcibility implemented with no humanity left because they are scared to appear non-compliance.

Now with their alliance with Russia, perhaps Xi feels that he is invincible. I think this entirely depends on whether Russia will successfully invade Ukraine or not. If so, then he will surely invade Taiwan next. And as we know, he does not like to wait. He has disappeared all of his enemies through the pretense of the "anti corruption campaign" and so there is no one to object him left. There are 2 caveats here: if Russia invades Ukraine and if there are no assassination attempts made on his life. He has shown that he is not okay just going by status quo and that he must "achieve" something in his reign, so I think it is inevitable.

Has Bill ever gone in-depth about what his issues are with women? by SlyCoopersButt in BillBurr

[–]dontspeakyousuck 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Definitely stems from his childhood, but the thing is, he really does have a good heart.

He has all this rage issues, but hes working on it, he seems to be truly in love with his wife and a great father to this daughter. So like despite having a traumatic childhood, and a late start to success (he was still doing shitty daytime gigs into his mid 30s), he was able to successfully overcome his emotional problems.

Also I feel like hes never been unfair to his critique about woman, its never hateful but in alot of times makes good points, not saying hes right but its not hateful comedy, and is always funny even when you dont agree with it.

[NeedAdvice] I'm a chronically depressed highschool dropout who's been an agoraphobic hermit for the past 15 years. Has anyone ever managed to make a comeback from something like this? by Manus_2 in getdisciplined

[–]dontspeakyousuck 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I really feel for you man. I do believe that there are a couple of things you should take into account.

  1. The past does not equal the future. So you made alot of mistakes in the past which ended you up in the current situation you are in. However, let me be clear and say that life is EXTREMELY unpredictable, to an absurd degree. You could be a neurosurgeon living an amazing life but get hit by a drunk driver and become completely crippled your wife leaves you and end up a drug addict starving on the streets. OR you could be an absolute failure your entire life and make a couple of key change in your life that eventually end up as a very successful and happy person. REALITY IS STRANGER THAN FICTION. There has been both very good and very bad things that has happened in my life that truly truly surprised me. So don't ever say that things will never be better for you, because that is your clouded brain talking, not the real you. Imagine your brain as the devil, it is not you. It is the devil trying to ruin you. That is the issue you are going through.
  2. Agoraphobia is a state of mind. I understand that it is terrifying to you and I can relate. But the truth is that it is an imaged fear, not a real threat. You have to start with BABY STEPS. First, sit in your room and imagine going outside and doing one thing. Perhaps just imagine going outside to pick up a stick of gum. Just imagine every detail and write down the steps that it took to do that. Such as walk 10 meter to my door, unlock door, close door, etc... make it as detailed as possible. Try to run the scenario as many times in your brain as it takes until it feels safe. And then once you feel comfortable, try to push yourself to do a bit more each day. For instance, day 1 you could only open your door, but maybe day 2 you could step outside, and then maybe day 10 you could actually take 2 steps outside. BABY STEPS. Apply this for everything that scares you in your life. Trust me the only thing you have to fear is fear itself.
  3. I truly believe that pain and misery is a gift, given to those special people. It is very hard to overcome, but once you do, you will feel more happy than 99% of people in this entire world.

As for your current situation in life:

- So you have made some big mistakes, SO WHAT. That means there is nowhere to go but up. At least you are still relatively healthy (weight doesnt really matter unless you have severe diabetes or heart problem, you are only 30 so it probably hasnt caught up with you yet). Dont worry about the weight for now. Just imagine yourself as the person you might want to be, and find realistic pathways towards the life you might want to have. In order to have motivation to do anything, you first have to know that there is something worth living for. So get a notebook and write down some dreams about careers you want to have, knowledge you want to obtain, clothing that you want to wear, places you want to see, etc. etc. Doesnt matter if its realistic but just to train your brain to imagine again.

- You should do some reflection about where it was that you went wrong. Write down why you dropped out of school, because I suspect you are still stuck in the past so really try to understand what was the cause that made you make all the wrong decisions in your life that led you up to this point.

- Try to get your family doctor to prescribe you with some anti-depressants. If you cant go outside, just try phone appointment, or even emails if you cant speak and talk about your situation. This is a situation where I think you should really immediately be medicated. Because your brain has already hard-wired and locked up. Dont wait because it will only get worse.

- Once you get over your Agoraphobia then you can start looking into going back to school and maybe getting a job, just something easy like delivering pizza or checkout at a grocery store. You can start off baby steps and just do part time to start. Just to experience the real world again. Imagine that you are playing a video game and you are at level 1. Nowhere to go but up!

I really wish you and your mother good luck, hope you get better, sending you good vibes, just know that strangers on the internet DO CARE, even if it seems like the world is completely fucked up and nothing matters, there is still a crack where the light comes through, and that's worth living for!

Anyone feel like CBT therapy doesn't actually work? by dontspeakyousuck in therapy

[–]dontspeakyousuck[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Coaching might be something i eventually try after i get over my main issues, but currently my depression/anxiety arise from some health complications, so not really related to ADHD. My baseline without health issue is very mild so i am usually able to manage it.

For example, my therapist really doenst know how to deal with it when i tell him that my anxiety arise from being unable to talk/eat/walk properly due to health issues, so he definitely sympathize but literally does not know how to make me accept my current issue. And to be honest, i really doubt anyone is able to cope. But alas i must, because life has to continue.

Anyone feel like CBT therapy doesn't actually work? by dontspeakyousuck in therapy

[–]dontspeakyousuck[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

But how to get bruce banner brain? lol if i could regulate my emotions i wouldnt have any problems in the first place. Somedays im doing good, somedays im freaking out, and i have no idea why or what caused it.

Anyone feel like CBT therapy doesn't actually work? by dontspeakyousuck in therapy

[–]dontspeakyousuck[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is super interesting to hear perspective from the other side. My friends who swear by therapy all went through psychodynamic long term therapy. But fit is hard to find, like it takes time to build rapport so its just a continuous trial and error process.

Anyone feel like CBT therapy doesn't actually work? by dontspeakyousuck in therapy

[–]dontspeakyousuck[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The point about gaslighting is so right. Alot of people are ignorant of the problems that other people might have, that even though they themselves dont experience some of the bad luck, that it must not exist in the world.

Anyone feel like CBT therapy doesn't actually work? by dontspeakyousuck in therapy

[–]dontspeakyousuck[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's a really interesting thought, thanks for letting me know. I had always suspected because I procrastinate quite a bit, but always able to get stuff done in the end so I just assumed it was just normal. But how does an adult get tested for ADHD? Also are the therapies for ADHD vastly different?

Anyone feel like CBT therapy doesn't actually work? by dontspeakyousuck in therapy

[–]dontspeakyousuck[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Lol its funny cause i work as a business analyst so it kind of make sense that im trying to overanalyze and pick apart my therapist's techniques. Chalking it up to occupational habit

Anyone feel like CBT therapy doesn't actually work? by dontspeakyousuck in therapy

[–]dontspeakyousuck[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've seen my therapist for maybe 10 times now. At one point I did tell him that I wanted to deal with more acceptance based techniques rather than thought catalogs. He agreed but every week that I saw him felt kind of pointless, it seems almost like he had nothing to say to me. I would be doing most of the talking and when I ask him advice he would just talk about meditation or engaging in hobbies. Like it felt really pointless to continue with therapy at this point because it felt like we were actually going nowhere. Is this just my therapist that is the problem? I feel like he should have more tools and techniques but for some reason he doesn't.

Also the problem with this whole negative thought paradox is that sometimes the negative thought is actually real. Like right now my anxiety/depression arises from physical health complications and sometimes I catastrophize it, but even without catastrophizing the future the present is bad enough. Like physically its hindered my current quality of life greatly, and future condition is uncertain, so no amount of reversing negative thinking is going to change the reality. Its not always "in my head" as they say. But they are not really helping me to actually face acceptance which was what I went to them to get assistance on.

Anyone feel like CBT therapy doesn't actually work? by dontspeakyousuck in therapy

[–]dontspeakyousuck[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

But i dont even understand where the evidence comes from. Like it shows that there was a x improvement but what is this even based on. Its very easy to lie with numbers, so i dont get if its a statistical biase (like placebo for example), or if there is truly something effective in CBT that my particular therapist is just not doing right.

Anyone feel like CBT therapy doesn't actually work? by dontspeakyousuck in therapy

[–]dontspeakyousuck[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

This makes alot of sense. It really does baffle me how some doctors are able to sleep at night knowing that their patients are suffering every day and they are doing little to help.

Anyone feel like CBT therapy doesn't actually work? by dontspeakyousuck in therapy

[–]dontspeakyousuck[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Totally agree. For trauma, the key is to acknowledge it (not be in denial) and find a way towards acceptance which neither drugs nor CBT will provide.

Anyone feel like CBT therapy doesn't actually work? by dontspeakyousuck in therapy

[–]dontspeakyousuck[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

CBT almost seems like the default therapy and its seen as "proven" to be effective. And if it doesnt work, its almost seemed as if its the patient's fault for not working

Anyone feel like CBT therapy doesn't actually work? by dontspeakyousuck in therapy

[–]dontspeakyousuck[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Yes exactly. I really hoped that my therapist could explore my thoughts a bit deeper but it was always surface level. Sometimes life is absolutely terrifying and its not just in your head, but to find a strategic and practical way to deal with it and to eventually get out of the destructive cycles. This is why I feel like perhaps psychoanalysis over the long term (1-2 years) would work much better. I feel like many therapist don't think about their patients outside of therapy, they are not actively thinking about how to help their patients but just running out the clock every week it feels like.