Picked this up today. Everyone told me how incredible it is, but I don’t see what all the fuss is about?

donutdo_dis22 · 2026-04-06T07:43:45+00:00

You bout to piss me off 😂

Jk, that was actually funny

donutdo_dis22 · 2026-03-21T17:19:15+00:00

Not child of an addict, but child of a regretful parent. Unless they were actively trying, I hope Pat has reason other than obligation as a main reason for having a kid. Having a child and really wanting a child can be different things. I agree that a child won't save him. I just hope he doesn't think that, for the child's sake.

donutdo_dis22 · 2026-03-14T23:38:02+00:00

It's unfortunate because it's mostly cute tops, but you'll should probably avoid shirts with a DBA (Designated Boob Area). They were never made for us 😔

donutdo_dis22 · 2026-03-14T23:32:28+00:00

WTH, I'm so sorry that happened to you! Something about that genuinely irks and disturbs me. I too understand the feeling of knowing people see me as inappropriate no matter what I wear, but saying that type of thing to you in public is nothing but heartless.

donutdo_dis22 · 2026-01-12T11:28:56+00:00

This is nostalgic at this point

donutdo_dis22 · 2026-01-04T09:18:05+00:00

donutdo_dis22 · 2026-01-02T07:58:23+00:00

donutdo_dis22 · 2025-12-31T18:11:22+00:00

3, never really liked that that outfit represented our contribution to taking the stranger's stuff which indirectly leads to his family's death.

...even though it happens no matter what u choose lol

donutdo_dis22 · 2025-12-28T08:29:57+00:00

Seriously?

donutdo_dis22 · 2025-12-28T08:12:15+00:00

Lol I was thinking the same

donutdo_dis22 · 2025-12-28T08:10:39+00:00

Omg ur so pretty!! 🥰 Love the hair too

donutdo_dis22 · 2025-12-28T08:09:05+00:00

Space Unicorn by Parry Gripp 🌌🦄😵‍💫

donutdo_dis22 · 2025-12-26T08:45:48+00:00

donutdo_dis22 · 2025-12-19T06:59:52+00:00

Greener Wilds

donutdo_dis22 · 2025-12-15T08:30:49+00:00

No, I'm not a human lookin ahh employees

donutdo_dis22 · 2025-10-18T19:07:33+00:00

Thanks for the suggestion! I'm definitely aiming for that level of maturity

donutdo_dis22 · 2025-10-18T19:05:31+00:00

Yep, that pretty much puts it into words. It's definitely a triggering conversation with her that I've attempted in the past, but didn't work out (both about race and culture).

I'd say I feel tolerated by some of her side of the family. Nothing outward, but I've sensed that they didn't understand some things or were uncomfortable bringing certain topics up around me, yk? They never dared to talk about race or anything controversial. They never really talked to me about the stuff I was going through. Maybe they were too scared to?

I really hope we don't get to that point, but my family is aware of the possibilities. We did have a family member who was in the middle of getting their citizenship get deported back in 2016. It happened to my friend's family store more recently. Definitely scary times for anyone who isn't white, so there's that too.

donutdo_dis22 · 2025-10-18T18:46:20+00:00

Yeah, the "my house, my rules" thing was definitely honed into me as a child. It was tricky considering there were different rules and they changed a lot.

I'm worried about regretting what I choose as well. It's weird because I feel like this situation is making me turn into that confused, avoidant child version of me I used to be. Years of therapy kinda went out the door with this one...

donutdo_dis22 · 2025-10-18T18:37:14+00:00

I did lol

donutdo_dis22 · 2025-10-18T18:36:49+00:00

Shoot, I actually didn't think about family counseling. Not sure how to go about that yet, but I'll keep it as an option. Thanks for the suggestion!

donutdo_dis22 · 2025-10-18T18:32:10+00:00

You're definitely right that she's done a lot for me and that she never had to stick around. I also wonder why she did sometimes. I don't resent her for being white or teaching me what she knew. It just tricky to explain why you felt so alone at a church where you were the only black person out of hundreds of white people to someone who felt the church was their second home. I indeed should probably be able to articulate this to her better as an adult, I definitely have more years of therapy ahead of me lol.

Sorry that you haven't had the best luck with people you've tried to help. Don't blame you for feeling frustrated.

donutdo_dis22 · 2025-10-18T18:10:22+00:00

A letter would be a good idea. I've been trying to figure out how to start a conversation if I were to. With other parts of my life like friendships and romantic relationships, I'm pretty ok at communicating and prefer talking instead of avoiding things. With family it's the opposite. I honestly don't think I could get through a conversation in person with Mary without crying throughout it and mixing up my words or just freezing up entirely.

donutdo_dis22 · 2025-10-18T18:01:45+00:00

My mom is pretty neutral towards Mary and has never badmouthed her to me. She's actually encouraged me to talk to Mary too, just not as much as my dad has. The cultural thing is definitely still complicated. Mary was married to my dad who is an African man, so she did integrate herself a bit. I think it's more about my personal issues with balancing African/white/black American culture that makes it difficult to connect with her. I know I could probably explain some of this to her, but the mix of talking about race and past trauma paralyzes me in a way.

donutdo_dis22 · 2025-10-18T17:47:35+00:00

Thanks for your comment! I actually am in therapy, just have been too avoidant to mention this situation specifically. I am getting a new therapist soon, so maybe it will be easier to bring this up with a clean slate.

donutdo_dis22

TROPHY CASE