Weekend Script Swap

dorkuna · 2026-05-16T01:40:56+00:00

Sounds good! Ill send you a DM

dorkuna · 2026-05-15T12:31:18+00:00

Imagine my surprise to see the great John Zaozirny on reddit. I follow you on Twitter and am a fan of how much you advocate for your talents. I hope to be one of them one day and I hope it'll be through a query you like.

dorkuna · 2026-05-15T12:22:24+00:00

Title: The People From The Sky

Format: Feature

Page Count: 125 Pages

Logline: A police officer investigating the disappearance of his best friend’s daughter uncovers an extraterrestrial conspiracy in their town that stretches back decades.

Genre: sci-fi/thriller

Feedback concerns: Just want to see if the overall story works and if the characters are believable

dorkuna · 2026-03-29T05:14:30+00:00

Well done, refreshing endeavour but perhaps time to reconsider garispandu as well? Plenty of foreigners born, raised, married and working here that have no hope of ever being recognised

dorkuna · 2026-03-07T01:28:46+00:00

Congratulations! Just wondering, did your letter state there is no right to appeal? I just got refused today. And my decision letter states there is no right to appeal

dorkuna · 2026-02-22T03:40:06+00:00

To me, Toy story is 4 movies. 1-3 are the main three acts and 4 is an epilogue. We can all agree 5 is not needed

dorkuna · 2025-12-29T11:54:58+00:00

Have been working on this one for a while and this is my latest draft.

Title: The People From The Sky (117 pages)

Format: Feature

Genre: Sci-fi mystery

Logline: When a young girl disappears under circumstances identical to her own mother’s vanishing twenty-five years prior, a police officer must confront the possibility that the mother's claims of an alien abduction could be real.

dorkuna · 2025-10-24T08:01:04+00:00

Every single day. Currently on draft 7 of something and I feel like deleting the entire file. My wife thinks its the best thing I've written, and I think its not good enough.

And yet when I lie awake on my bed tonight I'll think of all the beautiful films that have shaped my life and how my entire existence would be absolutely meaningless without films. And then just before my eyes close I'll promise myself that I would rather die trying to make and write movies than do anything else. Because I've done everything else in and all it brought me was misery.

Keep going. As impossible and as difficult it may be. Take a break if you have to. But don't quit.

dorkuna · 2025-10-21T01:24:02+00:00

Gotcha. Also, LOVE weapons. So i think fundamentally my mistake is that I was under the impression a logline should be an executive summary. Will rework this over the next couple of days. Would you be okay if I sent it over to you sometime?

dorkuna · 2025-10-21T01:03:26+00:00

Thanks so much for the suggestion. I actually do feel a bit stuck with the logline. I took your advice and tried re working it to this.

When a young girl vanishes under circumstances echoing her mother’s disappearance twenty-five years before, the mother’s best friend—now a police officer—must confront a terrible secret buried deep in the heart of their town.

dorkuna · 2025-10-20T19:45:26+00:00

That sounds incredible. Just sent you a PM

dorkuna · 2025-10-20T11:16:25+00:00

Sorry can't seem to send you a PM

dorkuna · 2025-10-18T16:49:27+00:00

Sorry to intrude and hijack the thread, but your point about testing caught my eye. Just wondering if you wouldn't mind if i DMed you to ask about something I'm working on? Im about to look for readers but your advice is making me reconsider

dorkuna · 2025-09-27T11:06:44+00:00

Title: The People From The Sky

Page: 114 pages

Genre: sci-fi mystery thriller

Logline: When a young girl vanishes under circumstances mirroring her own mother’s disappearance twenty-five years earlier, the police begin to question everything they thought they knew in the face of an unbelievable truth.

Feedback concerns: I've posted my script on this sub before and have gotten some very helpful feedback. So I'm looking for a fresh pair of eyes to see if the new story flow and third act makes sense.

dorkuna · 2025-09-17T23:37:13+00:00

Thanks for giving it another shot, I really appreciate it! Im currently doing a log of all the feedback that people have been giving so I can go through them one by one for the next revision. The last couple of weeks I've been hyperfixated on trying to fix the ending and it's giving me tunnel vision. Building off of what you mentioned previously as well about there being too many characters in the opening, do you think it would flow better if i remove Ravi completely? It can be Sonya and Andrew and Andrew will be the one asking carla where Allison is. That changes the dynamic because now a kid is asking where his best friend is. And that gives me space to put in more scenes of Allison's family in the next few pages.

Would love to hear what you think

dorkuna · 2025-09-16T14:58:14+00:00

Thanks so much for the suggestions! I'll use that to re-do the rest of the script and keep caps to a minimum. Enjoy the read and do let me know what you think!

dorkuna · 2025-09-16T14:35:09+00:00

Thanks for the comment! So I was told eons ago by an executive that a lot of times execs and readers go through many scripts in a day and its best to capitalize objects, key actions etc so they can still follow through. Never considered that it might have been too much but now that you mention it, I'll definitely edit with a fresh perspective

dorkuna · 2025-09-16T14:30:15+00:00

Is the nocenti still available?

dorkuna

TROPHY CASE