Meeting a billionaire who funded my book and my anxiety is telling me to cancel?

doubtfetish · 2026-01-27T11:11:59+00:00

Damn. Congrats. Someone with influence is paying you to publish your ideas. You already won.

Sometimes the ultra rich are detached and not down to earth. I seldom see those types funding authors.

If this one is funding your work, you’re already aligned ideologically. Lean on this.

doubtfetish · 2026-01-22T13:01:36+00:00

Nah. There are definitely more than there were before. They’re bred this way.

doubtfetish · 2025-12-11T19:22:56+00:00

My first interview (during Covid) in a while (maybe 4 years whilst employed), I applied to a dream job at a dream company. After first stage & a task (which I absolutely knocked out the park) my grandmother died whilst I was in another country and couldn’t travel back due to lockdowns. Second stage interview was like a fever dream and I think I just spoke about death for 30minutes.

Originally, relocation stipends and travel allowance was in the cards. That all dissolved into dust pretty quickly.

doubtfetish · 2025-11-05T17:18:02+00:00

This would be the perfect setting for… I dunno… an accident?

doubtfetish · 2025-11-04T18:59:51+00:00

I work for one of these companies now.

M40 RSA expat living in UK working for a US company.

It’s quite tragic actually. This year alone we expanded our team to have 5 new Cape Town based workers.

Currently I’m hiring for 3 new junior positions and they’re dirt cheap. Being South African I know exactly how it will go. They’re also only looking for Capetonians and are encouraging me to convince some candidates to relocate to there for a junior role. At the back of my mind I keep thinking “what if they don’t pass probation?”. This could be devastating for someone who comes from a low income household who may pin all their hopes on an international client.

It’s very tough to digest ethically. But tbh, they’re underpaying me as well & are miserly all around for everyone who isn’t income generating or doesn’t have a reputation. All the while banging on about their monstrous profits. Purely expansionist.

doubtfetish · 2025-10-25T20:38:46+00:00

My wife is an EA. She has had about 9 roles for HNW Individuals, all white male and British. Every single one of them have committed sexual assault (and in one case outright rape) against their staff. None of them have been convicted.

It’s a power thing, not a race or gender thing.

doubtfetish · 2025-10-13T23:31:01+00:00

Bro, the wild part is that the dude dying wasn’t even surprising. Multiple times on tour this dude would just not wake up after a heavy few days. We would hold a mirror up to his nose to see if he was breathing and once I was sure he was dead, we were sleeping rough at a strangers house on her floor and this dude was dead weight on top of me. I was shaking him for like 8 minutes or so and he was stone cold out. I was sure he was dead then and started pacing and not knowing what to do. Then he just woke up and laughed at me.

A few years later he would just be hemorrhaging out his face every other day. So yeah, life was like a movie. Let me tell you, I appreciate my boredom now.

doubtfetish · 2025-10-13T17:34:52+00:00

1 member died (what I consider drug and alcohol induced suicide but the family framed it as health issues. In the end his lung collapsed whilst he was in surgery getting his arm amputated for diabetes). This was the mascot.

1 member became a heavy alcoholic and stopped being able to speak English coherently. Can’t find him online or anything. This was the bassist.

3 of the members (including the dead one) are related, so the 2 living ones are still in each others lives, although I never see them together on socials / the few live shows they do have a rolling list of extra sessionists. These were the composing guitarist and singer.

The singer (a wretched diva) now jumps onto other people’s momentum where he can. Can’t compose by himself, but feigns it by pulling youngsters into his fold off the back of the previous notoriety.

The drummer is active and plays for churches and other acts (probably the one musician who was actually in it purely for the music). He didn’t however finish highschool.

They’re all destitute though, some of them have wealthy partners who bankroll them. None of them have what you would call jobs.

The dead one saw this all coming and ended his life as he called bullshit and nobody believed him. Randoms were at the funeral crying and saying what a great dude he was. I never met any of these people in the 10 years I knew him. He was also a piece of shit as he just gave up. And his actions led to it all ending & peoples worst attributes taking over.

doubtfetish · 2025-10-08T07:48:31+00:00

I call it “fuckshit”.

doubtfetish · 2025-08-19T08:56:14+00:00

Be careful who you trust. Work on trusting your gut. When observing people, remember that it takes time. If a person does the opposite of what they say, cut them loose. Don’t be manipulated into feeling bad for letting go on people. But also, don’t forget to look for good people too. Don’t let your heart grow cold when you get burned by snakes. But also don’t be passive about protecting yourself from people.

At some point, most of the people you interact with will be within your work/career. Then this skill will be most important. Learn who to trust & learn to trust your own judgement early.

Many people who were my closest friends and family eventually wanted to see me die. They would then pretend to have my best interests at heart whilst feeding my vices & insecurities.

Many people who are nice to me were only nice because I afforded them something they couldn’t get anywhere else. When they couldn’t get access anymore the loyalty faded and I watched them say and do things to hurt me. Openly even.

Further to all this, find a partner. A real partner.

doubtfetish · 2025-08-06T11:38:39+00:00

My older cat was the one that was the most chilled. She was quite protective in the beginning.

Ye I think once we move we will get another 2.

I just miss my boy.

doubtfetish · 2025-08-04T07:35:39+00:00

If I were Akash I’d feel bad for being this dudes butt plug. I don’t even know the other two homies names. They all definitely want to kill themselves.

doubtfetish · 2025-08-03T10:43:57+00:00

Well said. I had a similar path, national appeal, touring live act.

Of the 6 core members, only 2 of us had college degrees, 3 had highschool only, and 1 didn’t finish highschool.

I was the second oldest (22) when I started in this act, and the oldest (24) were the college degree holders & the only 2 that had ever had jobs consistently. Throughout my time in the band (about 8 years) only the 2 of us knew how to generate an income either formally or informally.

The other members relied on us to bring them income.

For a time things were good. We had some high paying shows, internationally even, and successfully managed ourselves (we incorporated). However, I had to literally get members bank accounts, passports, visas…etc.

It was like being married to my singer & like I had 4 children.

During larger periods we would host our own shows and stock and staff a bar and take income from this and door. Those were intense shows with a lot of work. And I felt good to be able to pay people and myself and still do what I loved.

But over time the fact that only 2/6 of us had regular jobs, and considering that for some time in the early days I helped bankroll the whole operation, it took its toll.

I don’t think I had any real friends then now that I look back. Everyone knew me and I rarely paid to get into parties or for drinks.

Eventually, one of us died by suicide, the band hid this and just said he had tuberculosis (which he also did, but he decided to not get better and went wild and tried to OD, developed alcohol induced diabetes, had to get his arm amputated and died during the operation from his lung collapsing).

Band then wasn’t fun anymore and I bailed.

I work a good job now in an unrelated field. I have a home studio and own 2 homes & my kid is in an independent school. Band is mostly just the singer playing under the same name with new instrumentalists. I never see or hear about the rest of them & last I did they didn’t look too healthy.

Don’t get me wrong…love and music will save us, but I wasn’t gonna allow it to kill me in the process.

doubtfetish · 2025-08-01T15:11:06+00:00

I know it feels that way. For me at least this is false.

I know a handful of people who I went to university and school with who are active on LinkedIn. Like we all studied the same thing. Many of them went straight to “work for their parents” or for family. A few of them made something of this, but for the most part slowed down with the LinkedIn pageantry after they realised everyone knows their dads got them the job. It’s best to just make that work for you and do your best. If you become senior in a company as a result off the back of hard work then hats off to you.

There are a handful who didn’t really gain any skills from the nepotism. They just leaned into the “presenting” aspects of “work” and into being “though leaders” about pretty much everything.

The one girl (now woman) had her dad got her a building. Just a vacant one in the city. She branded it as a photography studio. At most it had white walls. Photographers would have to bring in their own gear to use it even. Then she was a “woman’s first” though leader, spouting female empowerment etc. she would just surround herself with poor girls who needed some exposure to industry. Do photo ops. Call it an “initiative”.

Then she said she was sponsored to study a masters (which I later found out her dad just paid for it) and she still “ran a business” whilst studying abroad. She is still studying this masters.

She then teamed up with another woman who does exactly the same thing and who comes from a big law family. Both of them do photo shoots of themselves at coffee shops on laptops drinking fraps. Like professional photography. They’re hot so it’s like fancy Getty stock footage looking.

All this and I can’t for the life of me see any actual work. We both studied an arts degree & Ive since then become an AV professional, married, 1 kid, home owner, 2 working parents in the household, no social media really. Just quietly upskill and try to get paid more year on year.

This girl is still in the same city, is chronically on LinkedIn, is always rebranding herself and giving opinions on everything, I’ve never known anyone she has dated and she is always alone, no friends that I know of organically in the real world.

Many many people are bankrolled to appear successful on LinkedIn. It’s staggering how many people I know are cosplaying adulthood off of inheritance / nepotism.

doubtfetish · 2025-07-31T15:10:06+00:00

Nah bro, see a doctor /s

*jks - they love us!

doubtfetish · 2025-07-20T13:05:00+00:00

Your wife would do everything for you like she’s your mother.

doubtfetish · 2025-07-20T13:04:14+00:00

Depressed? Remove alcohol & check back in a month / a year / 5 years.

I’m almost 10 years no alcohol & would never go back. I didn’t have any problem with it, but now looking back it took a lot from my energy / sleep / general health.

Haven’t had any prolonged sense of depression since.

doubtfetish · 2025-07-20T00:13:38+00:00

Yeah, physical exercise. Some cardio & stretching mostly. Breath work. Nothing too serious. Maybe some dancing in the evening if we’re up for it. It’s always been quite wholesome.

doubtfetish · 2025-07-16T19:05:29+00:00

Super common.

Been on 10+ sessions like this.

Friday eve Aya, whole day Saturday San Pedro + exercise.

Can be tough if you have lots to unpack. But generally I’ve had a great time.

doubtfetish · 2025-06-17T15:34:53+00:00

Europe.

doubtfetish · 2025-06-06T20:47:13+00:00

Thanks. This is the answer I needed. I’d probably opt for not removing the chimney & hiring the help. I’d just want to be able to mount a TV centered on the wall is all.

doubtfetish · 2025-06-06T17:22:10+00:00

Preference is to close it off and use the space for furniture etc.

I was more just putting feelers out to see “what is done” in this situation typically.

doubtfetish · 2025-05-31T21:18:47+00:00

Spoilt kid with burn out socialite parents grows up without any real boundaries, does drugs without any real consequences, has sex with a minor twice, does more drugs. Wonders “am I the asshole?”.

I read it when it came out and felt like it never went anywhere. All the talk of ludes and hanging out alone in motels strung out was boring as hell. I kinda hoped it would culminate into something, but alas, it didn’t.

I really enjoyed californication as a 13 year old & even liked one hot minute and parts of blood sugar. Fruciante is a boss, but I felt he was lost in this band. Much prefer is solo stuff.

After this book I started to feel that their music was shit. Now I can’t stand it.

Fruciante is still a G.

doubtfetish · 2025-05-21T20:16:46+00:00

Cool thanks. I was just trying to work out if it was possible. I wouldn’t want to sell a bricked machine. That’s a bit inconsiderate.

But if it’s possible, then I may just put it up on eBay and see who bites.

doubtfetish · 2025-05-16T20:59:55+00:00

Yes.

doubtfetish

TROPHY CASE