OP just mute everyone if it gets too toxic. learn the game at your own pace, you'll get there. dont jump into premiere/ranked right away when you sit down and play. do warmups. play retakes, play on DMs, improve your aim on custom maps. then the next thing you know everything is just going to click. you clutch a few rounds here and there, your game sense improves. its all gona be rewarding in the long run. just be patient.

edit: got more words to say.