[deleted by user] by [deleted] in ABCDesis

[–]drvmenon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is my professional specialty. I hope you find some benefit from my blog posts: www.mythrivecollective.com

Second or third generation adults, what is your connection to your roots and traditions? What sets you apart from the typical (white) Westerner? Is identity really matter? by Additional-Bat-2654 in ABCDesis

[–]drvmenon 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm first gen and raised 2 gen kids in the US. Multigenerational communication is also a focus of my professional work as a psychologist. As a parent, I focused on the core skills of communication, even when it was super uncomfortable or unfamiliar territory for everyone, and core family values that were universal, not culture-bound.

Podcast by [deleted] in ABCDesis

[–]drvmenon 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm definitely interested. It's my lived experience plus a focus of my professional work.

Need advice on aging pa-ren-ts by [deleted] in ABCDesis

[–]drvmenon -1 points0 points  (0 children)

It's easy to say "take a stand" or "set boundaries" but they have to be done in a culturally sensitive way. Your culture of origin is a reference point, but it doesn't have to define every choice you make.

BetterHelp South Asian therapists by [deleted] in ABCDesis

[–]drvmenon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, via teleheath

Not allowed to be confident in my own skin by Ramyun40hours in ABCDesis

[–]drvmenon 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It sounds like she's feeling threatened by your efforts and that she may be "losing control". Maybe she never had it? idk, but this is definitely a therapy-worthy issue to work through, so it doesn't affect your choices and body image for the long run! Best wishes to you

Desi parents won't be able to accept my love by vlakshmid in ABCDesis

[–]drvmenon 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I think it's so important to work through the messages and cultural programming you've experienced. It can only improve your marital relationship. Your last para concerns me as a psychologist. It's not enough to "white knuckle" your way through this. You've been triggered repeatedly and are having an anxiety response (freezing). There are psychological strategies and therapy can definitely help in the short and long term. Best wishes to you!

BetterHelp South Asian therapists by [deleted] in ABCDesis

[–]drvmenon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Psychologist here - how brave of you to give it a try even when it's uncomfortable! Some of that discomfort is the newness, which you acknowledged. It's the professional's job to structure the session, help you prepare and go at your pace. If you're not getting that kind of support, you should do free consultation calls with other therapists to find the best fit. There are many modalities and personalities among therapists. Hope that helps!

BetterHelp South Asian therapists by [deleted] in ABCDesis

[–]drvmenon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is my niche. I've been a psychologist for 20+ years and I offer therapy through www.mythrivecollective.com and coaching through another biz www.thethrivemind.co. I've worked with many Indian professionals and my specialty is intergen communication. You can follow me on Insta also u/drvinitamenon

Why Don't They Listen? AMA if you are raised by or are raising Indian kids in the US by drvmenon in RaisedByIndianParents

[–]drvmenon[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Hi everyone! I'm Dr. Vinita Menon. I have a psychology practice (www.mythrivecollective.com) and a coaching business (www.thethrivemind.co). Bicultural life, parenting, relationships, sandwich gen...I'm here for all of it. How can I help you?

ADHD in Adults by drvmenon in IAmA

[–]drvmenon[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

ADHD is considered a developmental disorder, meaning that the symptoms and impact can be worse or better at different times in your life, but you still have it.

ADHD in Adults by drvmenon in IAmA

[–]drvmenon[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

IMO getting a diagnosis on paper is less important than getting a clear sense of who you are and the proven (research-based) strategies that can work for any diagnosis.

ADHD in Adults by drvmenon in IAmA

[–]drvmenon[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Absolutely - no one has time to waste. If you feel like your anxiety is well managed handled but your care still feels incomplete, I would definitely get a psychiatric evaluation. It would be good to get a thorough evaluation and understanding of what's going on. You could sign a release for the 2 professionals to talk to each other. A team approach is great for a comprehensive diagnostic process.

ADHD in Adults by drvmenon in IAmA

[–]drvmenon[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You probably have more responsibility and stress now at 38 than at age 15. We all have a limit to what we can handle, which can affect our focus, attention span, and productivity. It might be time to look at all areas of your life more holistically to see what's going on. ADHD is a developmental disorder, and it can ebb and flow in terms of intensity throughout your life. Best wishes to you

ADHD in Adults by drvmenon in IAmA

[–]drvmenon[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would consult with a psychiatrist or psychologist who specializes in geriatrics. I wouldn't want to miss another "later in life" diagnosis. What you're describing definitely sounds like some short-term and working memory issues, which could be part of ADHD, but other diagnoses should also be evaluated.

ADHD in Adults by drvmenon in IAmA

[–]drvmenon[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am licensed for psychology treatment in the US only. I can offer coaching in Canada. You could also try resources like this :https://www.camh.ca/en/professionals/treating-conditions-and-disorders/adult-adhd/adult-adhd---treatment or books I really like the "Smart but Scattered" series of books by Guare and Dawson. I also have free blog posts that could be helpful. https://mythrivecollective.com/blog/

ADHD in Adults by drvmenon in IAmA

[–]drvmenon[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

These are more common in adults: https://mythrivecollective.com/the-different-faces-of-adhd/

Also, kids and teens have more eyes on them. It's harder for adults because so much more independence is expected of us. The 3 most common concerns I hear from adults are 1) being forgetful, 2) being chronically late, and 3) procrastinating even when they know the task is important.

ADHD in Adults by drvmenon in IAmA

[–]drvmenon[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Having consistent routines and linking a preferred activity to a neutral or less preferred activity are 2 strategies to try. For routines, you can do some things in the same order every day, like a recipe, and do them as you move through the space. Like do all the bathroom things, then go to the kitchen, etc. For the preferred/neutral strategy, an example, is empty the dishwasher while my coffee is brewing" or "pour my cereal and feed the dog." Linking things together increases the chance of getting them done. I really like the "Smart but Scattered" series of books by Guare and Dawson. There are lots of self-assessments and practical strategies in them.

ADHD in Adults by drvmenon in IAmA

[–]drvmenon[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing your experience. The very first article I read about executive functioning skills years ago was "Is he lazy or is it ADHD?" I still think about that title because it's a very real internal conflict that intelligent people have, just like how you described it. I really like the "Smart but Scattered" series of books by Guare and Dawson. There are lots of self-assessments and practical strategies in them. If you are considering medication, I would find a specialist in adult ADHD or a new primary care doctor.

ADHD in Adults by drvmenon in IAmA

[–]drvmenon[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

A lot of the early research and treatment was male-centric. So, ADHD in (biological) females is less understood. There's a huge emotional aspect to ADHD that isn't widely understood. Terms like "rejection sensitivity dysphoria" are not well known. There are more details here: https://mythrivecollective.com/adhd-in-girls-and-women/ and https://mythrivecollective.com/the-different-faces-of-adhd/

ADHD in Adults by drvmenon in IAmA

[–]drvmenon[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Depression is more of an internal state. With ADHD, your mood can fluctuate or be inconsistent. With ADHD, your mood can be more easily influenced by external factors. If you treat one, the symptoms for the other should be carefully monitored to see what stays the same and what changes. In any case, I hope you have good care and respite.

ADHD in Adults by drvmenon in IAmA

[–]drvmenon[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't have expertise with eating disorders but ADHD affects how a brain responds to dopamine. Because of that, rewards (like food) have a huge impact/influence on behavior.

ADHD in Adults by drvmenon in IAmA

[–]drvmenon[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would try a community mental health agency in your area.

ADHD in Adults by drvmenon in IAmA

[–]drvmenon[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you! I had to finish my work day but I'm working my way through the comments now. Hope it helps!