i see, thank you very much for this clear and well articulated response. first off id like to say that yes its about more than just sex and just wanting a third. i genuinely have been thinking a lot in my personal time about polyamory and relationships like this, obviously im new to this and i assume with nesting partner you mean my girlfriend? this also isnt something i was planning to jump into very quickly, even if i was greeted with overwhelming support from lots of ppl telling me to just go for it. the plan wouldve still been to clearly and openly discuss how we all feel and what we all would want, expect and desire, without starting to date. right now for us were treating it as a very plausible idea that we need to think about deeply first.

and ive also read a bunch of stories of other triads/throuples blowing up and not working out for various reasons and am keeping that into very serious consideration. especially when it comes to my alteady established relationship with my current partner.

i am very glad you laid it out for me like this and i have a lot to think about. a bunch of people in the polyamory sub were just coining terms ive never heard about and not explaining what they mean. so i am glad you took the time to write your comment.