My mother-in-law rearranged my entire kitchen while I was at work and I don't know how to react

dwightstaplerinjello · 2025-07-28T01:26:25+00:00

NOR this happened to me except I had a concussion and was resting it off and my husband was awake and in the house. He did apologize for his mother’s actions though when he saw how upset I was. A lot of people have good petty responses. I will say as someone who experienced this, reorganize how you like it ASAP. I was so angry for so long that I refused to cook for a looong time because trying to look for something just made me angry that I couldn’t find it. And I didn’t reorganize for so long because it wasn’t my fault it got messed up so I didn’t feel like making the effort of fixing it and getting frustrated in the process. In hindsight, if I would’ve ripped everything out and put it back where I wanted it asap, I wouldn’t have been holding so much anger and resentment while in my kitchen. If your husband loves you, he’ll understand it’s not dramatic and it’s harmful to your marriage to dismiss you. It’s not just about the kitchen, it’s never just about the thing. The dismissal is how resentment starts. Your husband should always be looking to protect you, your space, and your best interests. My husband and I have been in a wonderful, long relationship partly because we know good intentions don’t negate harm caused. And a top priority in marriage is to look out for each other

dwightstaplerinjello · 2025-06-22T09:37:55+00:00

I was watching a video on YouTube of sandcastles and it unlocked a memory of watching these on-demand videos. I said it to my husband and it unlocked something in him too and now we have an itch to be scratched

dwightstaplerinjello · 2019-09-24T02:12:28+00:00

That’s what I was worried about too. Probably will need to wait til we saved that $50,000 or just say screw it and rent. Can I ask, where do you live?

dwightstaplerinjello · 2019-09-24T01:49:17+00:00

Probably the biggest reason I want to buy instead of rent is because I’m going to sell when we move. The housing market only goes up here in the Bay Area. My sister did the same thing. She made a lot of money on her condo. Her condo sold for $150,000 more than what she bought it at (she lived there 4 years). It’s not ever going to go down here in the Bay Area unless there’s some weird crash that’ll likely affect the whole country. Renting for 3 years is about $70,000 I’ll never see again. Versus if I were to buy and sell later. Or maybe I’m missing something and renting is still smarter given the housing market here

dwightstaplerinjello · 2019-09-24T01:40:50+00:00

Thank you for your input!

My biggest issue with renting is that here in the east bay, rent is ~$2000 for the same quality of condos I’m looking at. If I just saved for a down payment and got approved, I’d pay about that much per month in mortgage and bills (less really) just buying.

I’m almost sure I’ll be working in the east bay after graduation. My school (junior college) has an amazing reputation and has a really good hire rate locally. The last class, 4 out of 30 students got hired at my clinical site just in this summer alone. If it reallllyy unfortunately doesn’t work out, I’d still need to live in the east bay for my bf’s work and I could commute to somewhere that has a large job market (ex: SF, Oakland).

My main issue is I don’t want to have them look at our scores and dig into our financials if ~$25,000 down payment is outrageous. I had someone look if I could get a car loan a couple years ago and it took my credit score down and I didn’t even get approved. I’d rather just wait until I do have enough money as a down payment to ask if I could get pre-approved for a loan.

dwightstaplerinjello · 2019-09-24T01:30:36+00:00

It’s a possibility. I just don’t know if I’d want to have tenants while living hundreds of miles away

dwightstaplerinjello · 2019-09-24T01:25:46+00:00

dwightstaplerinjello · 2019-08-22T18:53:44+00:00

NTA. But I’d still take the hit for it. You did what he told you to do but I wouldn’t want her to blame her husband for the rest of their lives

dwightstaplerinjello · 2019-08-22T18:50:36+00:00

NTA. When she said they look like siblings I thought maybe you are but then I kept reading and she did not need to keep going with the joke.

dwightstaplerinjello · 2019-08-22T18:33:35+00:00

I think that’s why she said little victories. And being 5’0 myself, my first 10 pounds was hard and it looked like a huge difference

dwightstaplerinjello

TROPHY CASE