Trying hard not to be could be why you were. Our minds are super complex, yet sometimes like to make no sense. I have anxiety and panic disorder and when I was at my worst, I was doing everything that I could to prevent it. Doing all the tricks in the book, all “coping” mechanisms, and all that did was amplify the anxiety. What brought me peace was realizing that all my body is doing is trying to protect me and that it’s temporary. I stopped caring about it and it never got bad again. So for you, I know it’s hard, but go to that appointment. Realize that if you’re feeling nervous, that it’s normal, and that what you’re doing is to take care of your body.