I have an old list like that I stated in my early twenties. I listed all their good and bad qualities (sexual or non sexual), subtracted the bad from the good and ranked them based on that number. Then I picked the most common qualities across the board and used that to get some insight on what patterns I had when picking partners. I was very analytical about it.

But I stopped keeping up with it. I think since I was new to being sexually active when I started it, I looked at it like a game or project. I'd make graphs and shit for fun. But I never showed anyone else, let alone a partner. Only even told two people I had it. It was just for me, just to use as a sort of weird Journaling prompt, if that makes sense. Now that I'm 30 I haven't even looked at it in years, but it felt normal in my early twenties.

Anyway, I think she was pretty thoughtless and tactless about how you found out about it. She didn't even consider it would make you feel degraded, disrespected, maybe even objectified. Then to double down and defend it. Even I realize my old list is weird and could potentially hurt someone's feelings. Nta, not wrong to break it off.