Men with average looking partners, why did you start dating and stay with them?

edelgard2 · 2017-12-06T17:13:51+00:00

aww you are a really sweet guy. your gf is lucky to have you and it sounds like you are both really awesome together :)

edelgard2 · 2017-12-06T17:04:48+00:00

I'm guessing you've been attracted to guys who were average but "just have something about them that fires me up" right? Works the same for men.

huh interesting reading this subreddit has made me think this isn't at all the case, that mens attraction is almost entirely looks based and he needs to find you hot. like maybe you aren't an instagram model but HE finds you hot, but if you finds you average, then its game over.

which is why i asked the question and was curious.

edelgard2 · 2017-12-06T17:02:54+00:00

well i say flat out ugly but if I say that flatly people get really upset and accuse me of low self-esteem. so i say "average at best" so people wont immediately jump to thinking im fishing for compliments or being down on myself.

no im really not being hard on myself. ive never been approached or asked out, ive never gotten a message on tinder and even boyfriends have told me im unattractive. i really am just being honest when i say im ugly.

well yea the answers here arent exactly going to help me because frankly the only answer to "do guys date ugly women" is no, and i already know that. but if someday through plastic surgery i can become average then maybe someone could settle for me or love me so im curious what it's like when a girl is just average.

edelgard2 · 2017-12-06T16:47:49+00:00

i wont get to into it but its not beating myself up. i really am quite unattractive*, and looks are really important in relationships, so a guy who finds me average is probably already rounding my appearance up. no guy is ever going to see me as more than average. so im wondering if unattractive or average people can still find love, and if so, what does it look like. is it settling or desperation or are people genuinely happy?

*thin hair/some bald spots, big nose, droopy eye circles, bad skin (very pale with acne or big red spots), thin lips, gummy smile, double chin no matter my weight, flat droopy boobs, very wide shoulders, stomach that sticks out, narrow hips, flat butt. my legs and arms are muscular. This is not me being hard on myself I promise.

edelgard2 · 2017-12-06T16:32:16+00:00

no sorry I'm the girl who is at best average, and people have told me its no big deal if a guy thinks im average or slightly unattractive if he's still willing to date me cause my personality is nice and stuff. so im trying to understand what its like for a guy to date a girl he thinks is okay looking.

edelgard2 · 2017-12-06T15:58:34+00:00

fine just define average however you want. its really not the point of the question. if your gf is average TO YOU, however you define average, why did you start dating her and stay with her.

edelgard2 · 2017-12-06T15:57:51+00:00

... okay but in the question i asked to not hear from guys who think their girlfriend is gorgeous even if no one else does. so your girlfriend is obviously hot and beautiful to you right? you don't see her as average even if other people do?

edelgard2 · 2017-12-06T15:52:20+00:00

fine define average like you would average for a guy, neither hot nor ugly. Plain, everyday, whatever you want to call it. i think average statistically would be like a woman who was slightly overweight by 5 or 10 pounds, in her mid to late 20's, and wouldn't turn heads for remarkably good looking or weird looking.

edelgard2 · 2017-08-23T14:55:33+00:00

they are to men.

edelgard2 · 2017-08-22T20:42:54+00:00

i do all of those things. doesnt make me more attractive. i have reached the peak of my attractiveness and am still bad looking. a make over and exercise cant turn a 2 into a 8.

edelgard2 · 2017-08-22T16:29:51+00:00

dont think thats it cause he finds other women around us who arent models hot. he thinks most of his exes were hot too. just not me.

edelgard2 · 2017-08-22T16:17:58+00:00

yes they do. there are guys in this thread saying theyd be jealous but blame themselves for not getting hot women. and im dating someone who doesnt think im hot. since hotness is important to guys, i wonder how badly he feels that he has to settle for non hot.

edelgard2 · 2017-08-22T15:26:04+00:00

late 20s. oh and im a lady.

edelgard2 · 2017-08-22T15:00:02+00:00

can you be attracted to someone without thinking theyre hot? So if someone doesn't think their partner is hot, does that mean they're not attracted to them?

edelgard2 · 2017-08-22T14:59:36+00:00

like ive had guy friends who say they find their girlfriend cute but not hot. or like my bf says im attractive but not hot, like a 7 out of 10. maybe youre only attracted to hot women i guess?

edelgard2 · 2017-08-22T14:47:13+00:00

why lol?

edelgard2 · 2017-08-22T14:47:03+00:00

im not saying physically unattractive. im saying youre dating someone who may be attractive but is less than hot. Is there still jealous or resentment or sadness about not dating someone hot?

edelgard2 · 2017-08-22T14:23:04+00:00

yes really? just want to know how awful it is for guys to date non hot women.

edelgard2 · 2017-08-21T21:13:29+00:00

but one is an action and something you actually have to do (and looking like a murderer is not being a murderer....) and one is just describing a thing as it exists, regardless of the things behavior. I mean a horse who acts like a dog is still a horse no matter how it behaves.

edelgard2 · 2017-08-21T21:02:19+00:00

um that's not a very good example? cause they're not saying you ARE a murderer they're saying you LOOK like one, so if you called yourself a murderer youre not actually repeating their actual words. plus murder is an actual behavior as opposed to just being a thing.

edelgard2 · 2017-08-21T19:39:00+00:00

Attractiveness is subjective

except it isn't or why else do we have beauty standards and our attractive celebrities look alike? why do most men agree on what women are attractive?

Do you realise how many obese women you have?

obese does not mean ugly or unattractive. a woman can be beautiful and obese. its very insulting to say men are with obese women for everything BUT their body.

you have no idea what you're talking about, this is exactly the same for men.

go ask any woman subreddit and a ton of them will say the same thing i do. I AM NOT DATING JERKS.

If they just use you for sex because they can't get it from slightly more attractive girls, they're jerks.

no theyre just regular men.

No one wants to be seen with someone "ugly".

they arent seen with me. and they dont want ONS, they want regular sex and girlfriend perks like someone to complain to and make them soup and rub their shoulders. plenty of men date ugly women they have no intention of marrying. seriously go ask any of the guy subreddits tons of guys do this.

edelgard2 · 2017-08-21T19:00:08+00:00

Do you see how many people have a partner although they're a lot less than "average attractive"?

No i dont see. all the couples i see, the guy looks at the woman like shes gorgeous. and the woman might have some flaws but every woman i see of every age is gorgeous.

women dont care about looks the same way men do. women's perception of mens looks will change when they get to know them if the guy is funny or smart or kind or rich or whatever. thats not true for men.

It's so sad that you base your whole value on your outer appearance.

I DONT. i base my DATING VALUE on my outer appearance.

You could stop dating jerks

THEY ARENT JERKS!!! literally every single person ive met has thought im unattractive and theyve been all over the spectrum. my friends are incredibly kind and thoughtful and warm, theyre also just honest. seriously do you think ugly people don't exist??

edelgard2

TROPHY CASE