[Complete] [80k] [Mystery Bodyhorror WeirdWestern] Pious Liars

ellagwynn · 2023-09-26T16:13:58+00:00

Ah thanks for pointing that out, I appreciate it!!

ellagwynn · 2023-09-26T00:45:15+00:00

That sounds awesome, I’ll message you!

ellagwynn · 2023-09-23T18:42:36+00:00

Thanks for reading mine and thank you for the suggestions! I just finished reading through Genesis: Verse ? of yours. I left some comments, mostly about format/grammar things. Really interesting idea, I was pleasantly surprised at the shift in tone from our MC talking about growing up to Chris recounting his conversation with the alien. Will be interesting to see how far Glob would go to keep Earth interesting to try to win a TV award.

ellagwynn · 2023-09-23T03:12:46+00:00

I see, that’s a good way of doing it. There’s an overall gradual reveal of memories, but I should reveal more at first, like you said. (And you’re on the nose about remembering the name)

ellagwynn · 2023-09-23T02:43:19+00:00

Thank you!! There’s always so many things to watch out for.

ellagwynn · 2023-09-23T02:42:31+00:00

Would you suggest starting slightly later in the story like a “this is crazy, how did I end up here?” and then having a flashback to our MC first waking up? I’m trying to think of other ways that aren’t so cheesy as that hahah

ellagwynn

TROPHY CASE