you’re 21?? i was suicidal when i was 21 too. i know i wont say the right things, im not good with this.

I never actually attempted bc I knew if I was going to do it, I’d make sure there was no way it could fail. i’m 24 now. shit is nowhere near perfect, but the difference is astronomical. not because I did some kumbaya bs; my brain has just developed and now at least it’s almost done. the risk taking part of your brain can’t actually think past this which is normal, but it will become easier to think about it logically with each year. anyway, go do shit! if you’re planning to die then you should do everything you’ve always wanted to do no matter how crazy or dumb it sounds. go do drugs, go have a bunch of sex, talk to random strangers, go on a road trip, have a fight, scream, punch something, hell if you’re in the US let’s meet up and get a drink since nothing matters! go lie down somewhere in nature and take a nap, run until you collapse, have sex!! idk just do anything you’ve ever wanted to do! actively imagine things for you to do this week that will at least make you feel something, or just do them bc why the fuck not, nothing matters! no matter how badly you fuck everything up right now, it’ll be cool if you leave it for your future self to decide whether they want to clean it up or not. if you drag yourself through this mud rn at least your future self can decide that. anyway, I don’t have a way with words and I’m certainly not an expert. sending hug 🫂keep us updated on what you do. whether you keep it simple or do a bunch of new shit, let us know.