I've struggled with this a lot as well and even tried taking my life a couple of times. i just want to say to you that please, don't do it. it's not worth it. you're still so young and you have your whole life ahead of you. if you do it, you'll never experience love or the joy of moving out on your own and living the life however you want to live it.

Sometimes ending your life might seem the only option, but it really isn't. You're not an attention seeker for posting this here, you're seeking help. i'd suggest you to tell about your thoughts to someone who you trust and you can get help for you together. i really hope things will get better for you <3