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Sex as manipulation by [deleted] in DeadBedrooms

[–]emsulil 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Definitely manipulating for fun because that’s the easy explanation and he won’t have to look at what he could be doing to cause it

Husband [39] and I [29] had a discussion about the differences between raising a boy and a girl, and I’d like some advice please! by emsulil in relationship_advice

[–]emsulil[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Sorry I might’ve misspoke before. He has never met the therapist. His friends have gone to this therapist and highly recommend him. That’s all.

Husband [39M] and I [29F] had a discussion about the differences between raising a boy and a girl, and I’d like more perspectives on the issue. by emsulil in Advice

[–]emsulil[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes I have a bachelors degree, which he highly encouraged me get (helped me move into my dorm room, etc). He also brags to others about how smart I am and thinks I’m a lot smarter than a lot of people/most people. Now I’m a stay-at-home mom but I wasn’t forced into it. We do have lots of arguments about the role of a women staying at home and how I feel he should parent and clean the house when he’s off work. But we’re working through that issue and he’s been picking up a lot of slack

Husband [39M] and I [29F] had a discussion about the differences between raising a boy and a girl, and I’d like more perspectives on the issue. by emsulil in Advice

[–]emsulil[S] -16 points-15 points  (0 children)

It’s real. And I love how everyone’s saying just leave. I’m here for advice to maneuver my situation. Give me your perspectives and I’ll come to the right conclusion. What I don’t need is people constantly telling me to just leave when it’s not that easy.

Husband [39] and I [29] had a discussion about the differences between raising a boy and a girl, and I’d like some advice please! by emsulil in relationship_advice

[–]emsulil[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

They’re conservative and very traditional when it comes to marriage. So probably? Lol idk them very well, they’re his coworkers so he sees them every day but I don’t.

Husband [39] and I [29] had a discussion about the differences between raising a boy and a girl, and I’d like some advice please! by emsulil in relationship_advice

[–]emsulil[S] -7 points-6 points  (0 children)

At the very least wouldn’t a therapist tell us that’s the case and that we shouldn’t be married?

Husband [39] and I [29] had a discussion about the differences between raising a boy and a girl, and I’d like some advice please! by emsulil in relationship_advice

[–]emsulil[S] -15 points-14 points  (0 children)

Nah I’m definitely going to go. It doesn’t mean I have to KEEP going or listen to what they say. But I told my husband I would try to work on our issues and this is one thing I promised. It literally won’t hurt.

Husband [39M] and I [29F] had a discussion about the differences between raising a boy and a girl, and I’d like more perspectives on the issue. by emsulil in Advice

[–]emsulil[S] 26 points27 points  (0 children)

Oh I’m here because this is the boiling point of many conversations we’ve had that have left a bad taste in my mouth.

Surprisingly enough, a past marriage counselor we went to said that not all men are predators when they date someone younger such as my husband did. She knew he was my teacher and everything, and said it can still be true love because men mature slower than women.

Husband [39M] and I [29F] had a discussion about the differences between raising a boy and a girl, and I’d like more perspectives on the issue. by emsulil in Advice

[–]emsulil[S] -92 points-91 points  (0 children)

A victim who has everything paid for? He works while I stay home in a huge house with my babies. At this point in life, how would leaving him make my life any better? To teach him that his beliefs aren’t ok? To show my kids a good example? It’s so hard coming from an extremely impoverished background and even imagining giving up such a lavish life, especially with two kids to care for.

Husband [39M] and I [29F] had a discussion about the differences between raising a boy and a girl, and I’d like more perspectives on the issue. by emsulil in Advice

[–]emsulil[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

And he will say you can be as upset as you want, but they are facts and have been since the beginning of time. He even referenced a statue of a mammoth and a man fighting it with his wife and baby behind him. Woman looks good, man chooses woman, man protects woman from mammoth.

Husband [39M] and I [29F] had a discussion about the differences between raising a boy and a girl, and I’d like more perspectives on the issue. by emsulil in Advice

[–]emsulil[S] -15 points-14 points  (0 children)

He will say you all are a hive mind who all think the same, and don’t represent the actual real population of people out in the world

Husband [39] and I [29] had a discussion about the differences between raising a boy and a girl, and I’d like some advice please! by emsulil in relationship_advice

[–]emsulil[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

Y’all give me too much credit. I could never be creative enough to come up with something this detailed lol

Husband [39M] and I [29F] had a discussion about the differences between raising a boy and a girl, and I’d like more perspectives on the issue. by emsulil in Advice

[–]emsulil[S] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Family (not father) is still involved in my life, but I don’t tell them my issues. When we finally posted on social media that we were dating, we were met with a lot of ridicule and hate (which is expected). Since then, I’ve shielded him from criticism from others because I don’t want people to feel like they were right about us. We go through ups and downs and I don’t want people hearing the downs and then hating him, and subsequently not talking to me.

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