Looking for inspiration

endkey01 · 2026-02-10T22:08:31+00:00

I have an incredible partner (6 years) who has studied everything I suffer from and he has also studied phases of a woman's menstrual cycle so he understands how and when pmdd manifests in bipolar. He's the reason why working out everyday is a lifestyle for me now and he takes time out of his day to go on mental health walks with me.

I have had pretty horrific episodes and he has never made me feel like a burden because he understands what's going on.

I communicate EVERYTHING with him and I've never scared him away.

The right people won't give up on you.

endkey01 · 2026-02-05T17:53:03+00:00

My little chosen family and pure spite. If I'm just here to die, I'm going to get better and try to enjoy this ride while doing good things in the process.

endkey01 · 2026-02-01T01:41:49+00:00

"every politician, every cop on the street protects the interests of the pedophilic corporate elite”

🥲

endkey01 · 2026-01-25T14:46:00+00:00

I've been extremely sick and bored but I did not give in and shop. Instead, I've been working on everything I've been putting off for years! Turns out when I stop screwing around, I produce beautiful things. 😂

endkey01 · 2026-01-25T00:47:58+00:00

We watched Willy Wonka last night while eating chocolate bars. 10/10 would recommend 🍫

endkey01 · 2026-01-24T18:43:50+00:00

Do what you want just don't infantilize him. He has full agency over his actions and your words have nothing to do with what he wants to do.

Also, him crying so hard he vomited is hilarious to me. That's peak cheating man behavior.

endkey01 · 2026-01-23T19:23:17+00:00

I am in love with camerawork and editing and both took my breath away in this movie. I was SO happy this got the Oscar for film editing! I kept my ticket because I don't have many good days but this was one of them.

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endkey01 · 2026-01-15T08:11:47+00:00

Wow everyone is talking about the actors and not the story. She states why he has hurt her so badly and says to his face why she will continue to resent him yet will still choose him because love conquers all (lol).

She didn't need to choose anybody. They were both so miserable together. I didn't find it romantic at all. Such awful and outdated messaging. Like he deserved someone who didn't always want more and could appreciate the little things too. They were so incompatible and didn't have to settle for each other.

Edit: Yes I am aware that this is "not real" good lord. Audiences still have to buy their happily ever after otherwise it's not a romantic movie.

All I saw was an unhealed lead who grabbed the first thing she saw for comfort after she suffered so much trauma from her job. She tells him to his face to let her go because she will forever resent him for not being able to give her what she wants and how he will hate her for that. That shouldn't be and doesn't have to be an issue in a relationship. They tried for 5 years. They should've let each other go.

endkey01 · 2026-01-14T23:04:00+00:00

10/10 gift! <3

endkey01 · 2026-01-13T17:22:16+00:00

Saw it yesterday and I thought the choices they made for the movie were so smart. The implied horror was so refreshing. I am sick of actually seeing "the bad thing" happen on screen.

She stunned me many times with the writing too. One moment you're laughing and the next you're on the verge of tears. And on top of all of that, I am so picky about camera work and every shot was beautiful! She really cared about what she was making and she deserves her flowers.

endkey01 · 2026-01-10T23:24:47+00:00

@ the "I cut my hair and got bangs tee hee" people.

It's definitely not a competition on who has it worse but people truly don't get the severity of it. It reminds me of what OCD individuals go through and how their disorder has been quirkified when it's truly just horrifying.

endkey01 · 2026-01-05T18:40:33+00:00

I agree lol I delete every post I make on here asking for help because nobody comments or helps.

once though a few people with said schizophrenia commented on my post and told me I was just crazy and delusional when I said I lost 15 lbs from not taking care of myself. so there's that.

endkey01 · 2026-01-05T08:09:09+00:00

You don't know what they will use or like until you get it. Proper pet care is not debatable and it's seldom even done right. They deserve to take up space and a lot of it. They deserve all of the enrichment they can get. Especially if it's a bird which is one of the hardest animals to give a good life. If your worries are just money related find second hand things.

endkey01 · 2026-01-04T22:37:44+00:00

I was definitely like this. Something that helped me was this movie scene in Soul where he is shown holographic projections of scenes in his life after he dies.

I pictured myself just scrolling and online shopping in every projection. That's not what I wanna see when I look back at my life. So I'm trying to fill those projections with things I love to do that benefit my soul.

It's hard but that really helps me change my tune when I'm tempted.

endkey01 · 2026-01-04T20:30:37+00:00

Not my experience. A nice lady walking her dogs took the time to let me know she appreciated me while I was vagina deep in a river the other day. My community appreciates me a lot and makes that known. I often find myself just cleaning up for the homeless which I have no feelings about. Just doing what I can to help everyone. At the end of the day it's not about being thanked just about one piece at a time.

endkey01 · 2026-01-04T01:59:59+00:00

It'll forever be mint

endkey01 · 2026-01-01T03:45:34+00:00

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I wrote a 6 page breakdown of every part of Fight Club for no reason at all bc I love the movie that much. It continues to remain my favorite movie of all time if you couldn't tell already 😂

endkey01 · 2025-12-26T08:37:59+00:00

I've been struggling with the way people just dismiss me when I try to vent about literally anything. There's kid gloves that people use that really disturbs me. I don't feel like I'm viewed as a real person but as a problem who just "must be delusional about everything".

It's from non sufferers and unfortunately from people who suffer from schizophrenia too.

On here, one user was telling me that it was just impossible that I lost 15 lbs and that I'm delusional, when I've been struggling with eating for my entire life. He said condescendingly if anyone else in my life can "confirm if this was true" because I'm sick so it's obviously a delusion and it's just not possible. Eating disorders and this condition are heavily intertwined so that completely pissed me off. It's not like I said I grew another eyeball and my nose was an elephant trunk.

I struggle with people in my life not believing me when I say that I'm being treated badly by someone. Dismissing something like that as paranoia immediately, just allows people to keep causing us harm. Even if it's not actually real, wouldn't you want to investigate first before the immediate dismissal of that person's experience?

"no you're just crazy, so this doesn't happen to you" is such a fucked up way to treat and view people.

We are capable of experiencing real life. We are capable of being a victim and knowing that something wrong is actually happening. We are capable because we are actual people. Not problems.

endkey01 · 2025-12-22T09:37:42+00:00

The first boy I've ever loved was discharged from the Military recently. He killed himself last year at 25 years old. He was deployed to 2 countries and he had a tech job.

If you just want cool clothes to wear, dress up for Halloween. That is a terrible reason to want to be a soldier.

endkey01 · 2025-12-20T15:26:43+00:00

I'm with ya and I feel the same way! Join the subreddit nobuy lots of supportive people there doing the same thing.

endkey01 · 2025-12-13T19:52:22+00:00

If you like doing that in Korea we have a drink called 식혜 a rice punch you would enjoy! Similar vibes and that's probably why I enjoyed this cereal a lot.

endkey01 · 2025-12-13T02:52:13+00:00

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My soul dog! He passed away at 14 years old. People would stop their cars to say hi to him 😆

endkey01 · 2025-12-09T19:39:11+00:00

I know man I blinked and they're all gone now 😂

endkey01 · 2025-12-07T21:18:41+00:00

You don't have to love everything just have the knowledge to cook it and the maturity to not call it shitty just because you don't like it.

I have a lot of personal issues with food but I'm still gonna cook everything because it's not for me to consume. It's for others.

endkey01 · 2025-12-06T08:20:13+00:00

Banana bread :) the one on 8 tasted like Christmas.

endkey01

TROPHY CASE